And Baby Makes Three
by CArfwedsonFan91
Summary: Zosia gets a shock when a drunken night out with Arthur results in a positive pregnancy test- how will the young doctors cope with the demands of impending parenthood? Rated M for swearing. DISCLAIMER I DO NOT OWN THESE CHARACTERS.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys, first of all I'm super-nervous about posting this! It's my first fanfiction I've ever started writing (mostly writing as a means of self-therapy I guess, it relaxes me and I'm just writing this for fun), despite reading them for a long time! Please do leave a review, I'd love to know your thoughts and what you think I could do with the story or improve etc**

**I've written up to chapter 6 already so I'll upload these tonight!**

 **Thank you!**

 **BTW whenever it's in italics, it's Zosia's thoughts.**

'Zosh? Zosia hurry up, my shift starts at the same time as yours and I really need a shower and get ready! This hairstyle doesn't keep itself fabulous, you know' Dom moaned through the bathroom door. Zosia was occupying the bathroom, kneeling on the floor in front of the toilet, holding onto the seat for dear life with one arm and holding her hair out of her face with the other. She didn't respond, thanks to the crippling nausea she was currently battling. All she could do was take deep, cleansing breathes. _'In through the nose and out through the mouth, Zosia...this isn't fair"_ she thought to herself. _"I only had one drink last night, I've had hangovers where I feel less crap"_

'Zosia!' Dom said raising his voice slightly, banging on the door. Again, silence. Zosia's head was spinning, her stomach curdling and she wanted nothing more than to be left in peace.

'Well at least Arthur's not home, only one to compete with today' he mumbled to himself as he stepped away from the door momentarily. However, he was stopped in his tracks by a noise he hated but one that concerned and worried him.

Zosia proceeded to projectile vomit into the toilet. 'Oh god please just end' she moaned to herself, unaware that her flat mate and friend was now slowly opening the door. As Dom peered inside the bathroom, he saw his flat mate struggling and after grimacing, he threw himself down next to her, and held her hair out of her face.

'That's it, get it all up' he comforted, rubbing her back in small circles. 'I'm sorry, I didn't realise you're unwell' he continued, starting to feel guilty that he was trying to rush her before. As she finishing vomiting, she grabbed some tissue, wiped her mouth and flushed the toilet before attempting to stand. 'Thanks' she muttered, although her lack of enthusiasm wasn't down to mood, it was all part of how awful she was feeling.

'What's brought all this on Zosh? You hardly drank last night' Dom asked, helping Zosia to stand. As she stood, she felt a little uneasy on her feet. She felt her blood rush to her head and then flush down again and she wobbled, but Dom caught her.

'Woah easy' he said, sounding worried, putting his arm around her waist to support her, and pulling her other arm around his shoulder for support. As the room stopped spinning after a few moments, she composed herself.

'I'm fine' she insisted but her pale complexion and shaky voice did nothing to convince the young doctor before her that that was true.

'Seriously, what's going on?' He asked her as he sat her down on the sofa, and leapt to the kitchen to get her a glass of water.

'God knows- stomach bug, stress, food poisoning, it could be anything' she replied, shrugging and taking a small sip of water. 'All I know is I feel vile'

'Pregnancy?' Dom laughed- in his usual style, he wanted to put a jokey spin on everything. Zosia laughed.

'Very funny...not possible' she laughed. But that one joke planted a seed. Of course, she didn't want to make it obvious to Dom that his joke had made her consider pregnancy as a possible answer to her problem of what was causing her stomach to spontaneously evacuate. _"But, it couldn't be...could it?"_


	2. Chapter 2

'Yes Mr Levy...I'm sorry but I'm going to be a little late...Zosia isn't very well...she almost collapsed this morning...ok, I'll-'

Zosia snatched the phone out of Dom's hand. 'I'll be in Mr Levy, I feel fine now' she hung up abruptly and Dom's dumbfounded expression still rendered him incapable of working out what had just happened. Was she crazy, planning on going to work when she near enough just collapsed just standing up?!

'Zosia, you're not well. You're not coming into work, which in case you'd forgotten, is in a hospital, where you'll be treating ill patients' Dom argued, snatching the phone back. Zosia went to argue back, but the return of her wretched nausea rendered her unable to respond. After realising she wasn't going to be able to win this argument with her flatmate, she gave in with a barely audible sigh and small nod, and Dom sat smugly triumphant that for once, Dr March was taking his advice before she leapt up and ran straight back into the bathroom to resume her previous position.

After Dom had to leave for the start of his shift, Zosia slowly stepped out of the bathroom and went back to her bedroom, picking up a bowl and her glass of water on the way. As she lay back down on her double bed after tying her hair up into a messy bun, she gently sighed, still feeling uneasy.

 _"Why do I feel so strange? Is it even possible that I could be...that?..._ " She wondered as she picked up her phone and opened the calendar app. In her teens, when she started taking the pill to help regulate her periods, she had taken to writing down the start and end dates of all of her monthlies, and since she was 14, her cycle had never been more than 15 days overdue from the previous month. But this time, she counted back _'1...2...no, two and a half...wait, three...months?!'_ She choked internally as she swallowed the lump of fear that had just formed in her throat and had unfortunately caused her nausea to return.

 _'How the hell did I not notice?!'_ She internally shouted as she vomited again, this time in the bowl she had brought into her room. Although, she was soon able to answer her own question. _'Life has been hectic...work, assignments, research, my diagnosis...oh god...ok, don't panic Zosia...now think woman, could there have been a time where...'_ And then her heart sunk, her pulse started to race and her chest felt tight, her breathing short.

' _Oh, God...no...could that have been 10 weeks ago?'_


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N Zosia's POV, Flashback: 10 weeks earlier**

'So Dr March, are you joining us for my birthday drinks tonight?' Sacha asked. 'It wasn't really my idea, but you know what Dominic is like' he added, taking a file from a nurse before we wandered over to our new patient.

'Of course' I replied. I knew that Dom, Arthur, Jesse, Colette, Dad, Ms Naylor and Ms Campbell, as well as others from AAU and Darwin would be likely to be going.

'Excellent, um, I believe the plan is to start at Albie's at 7.30' Sacha grinned. Dom looked over at me and smiled. I knew he was planning for this to be a messy, messy night. 'God help us all' Sacha sighed as he saw the look on Dom's face.

That evening, we all sat having some drinks at Albie's, and unfortunately for everyone else, because Dom, Arthur and I had been rushed off our feet all day, the alcohol was going straight to our heads.

'Zoshie, go careful' my dad warned as he bought himself and Jesse a pint, and Colette a glass of wine. He placed his hand on my shoulder as I downed another shot of tequila.

'I'm fine' I tried to convince him, but the fact I could barely walk in a straight line was not of comfort to him. He looked around for my flat mates and had to assess who he thought would be the most sober and sensible.

'Dr Digby!' He called over, and Arthur immediately tensed. He wandered over, tail between his legs.

'Y-yes Mr Self?' He stuttered. He may have been tipsy but he knew that whenever the CEO wanted to talk to him, that it wasn't going to be good news.

'Relax Frank' he laughed, adopting Jesse's nickname for him. 'No, it's just, I can see that Zosia is having rather a lot to drink, is everything ok?' He asked, fatherly concern in his voice, looking over at me as I downed another shot that Dom had just bought for me.

'Yes, yes I think so' he answered, looking at us too, pushing his glasses further up his nose.

'Please can you keep an eye on her?'

Arthur nodded, and dad patted him on the shoulder with gratitude as he returned to Jesse and Colette with their drinks.

As we danced and drank more and more, the others started to join in, and in my drunken state I became emotional, the kind of emotional where you cry over things that would t normally bother you when you're sober, and 9 months after breaking g up with Jesse, I found myself crying about him. Without knowing why, I found myself sitting out on the pavement outside Albie's in floods of tears and Arthur came to find me.

'Hey, hey what's wrong?' Arthur asked, sitting down on the kerb next to me, putting his arm over my shoulder.

'I miss him!' I cried, tucking myself into his shoulder. He put his other arm around me and held me close.

'Jesse?' He asked and I nodded, still crying my heart out. 'Zosia, he isn't worth it, you're worth so much more than him, you'll meet somebody who deserves you'

Arthur, sweet Arthur. He always knew what to say to make me feel better. When the sobs subsided, I pulled away. 'Thank you Arthur' I sniffed, and then looked at him. We looked into each other's eyes and the look lingered, yet neither of us looked away. His hand moved to gently stroke my cheek and then together, we moved in until our lips came together and neither of us pulled away. Our kisses got more passionate, heated, and the next thing I knew, I was getting in a taxi and Arthur ran inside to tell Dom and Sacha we were going because I'd had too much to drink, and although that was true, we were going back to the flat to spend some time alone together. It was no big deal, we'd slept together twice before. What was the harm?


	4. Chapter 4

'SHIT!' Zosia exclaimed, out loud this time. Details were hazy from that point but she remembered kissing in the flat, going into Arthur's bedroom, more kissing, and then... _'wait, we definitely used protection...so how on earth could I be pregnant?'_ she wondered. ' _I guess they aren't 100% effective, and we would have noticed if it broke...then again maybe not...fuck'_

she sighed as she lay down flat on her bed.

Zosia knew she had to find out for sure, so despite the occasional nausea, she pulled on some leggings, black boots, a long top and her grey Holby hoodie, and got a taxi to the nearest supermarket. She knew she must have looked like death, but she didn't care, she had to know. She picked up 3 tests of different brands just to be sure, paid and hurried back out to the taxi who she had asked to wait for her.

She hoped to get home, take the test and hopefully be relieved by the negative result she was hoping for before Arthur got home from his shift.

 _'Bloody Digby'_ she thought to herself. But then she remembered that it couldn't be all his fault, or anyone's fault in fact. She was 100% certain that they used protection, _'these things happen...just hopefully not to me_ ' she thought as she paid the driver and hurried inside.

'Thank god' she sighed, as she entered what she thought was her empty flat. She took the boxes out of the bag, and then something startled her. It was Arthur, coming out of their kitchen.

'Zosia, do you want-' Arthur started, and as Zosia was startled, she had dropped one of the boxes and he leant over to pick it up. However, he also happened to glance at what it was...

'Zosh...are you..?' He asked, his voice shaking and his face paling.

'I think so' she replied shyly, as Arthur stepped towards her. She wanted to go small, to shrink into the ground and go invisible, but instead she had to deal with the fact that Arthur was now grabbing his coat and running out of the flat. 'Arthur? Arthur come back!' She shouted, panicking, but he ignored her. As the door slammed, tears started streaming down her face. _'I've finally done it'_ she thought. _'I've finally fucked everything up'._

Still crying over an hour later, she knew that she had to know for sure whether she was, she supposed, with child.

She opened them all and took them all in one sitting, and then as she left the bathroom, tests in hand, she heard the front door click open and her other flatmate, the one who helped her get into this potential mess, reentered. She quickly tried to shove the tests in her pocket, and then realised she didn't have any pockets and by the time she considered a contingency plan to avoid upsetting Arthur again, he was already stood before her, staring down at the three white sticks she had in her hands.

She expected him to be angry, but instead Arthur took her by the arms and reassuringly stroked them, making eye contact with her.

'Let's sit down, and we'll talk' he said kindly.

'What? Why are you being so nice?' She asked, confused. She had expected him to run for the hills and leave and stay there, so why was he still there?

'Because if it's positive, it would be my baby right?' He asked nervously. She nodded in response. 'Then I need to do the right thing, and we would need to talk about this' he replied. At this moment Zosia was so glad that he was Arthur Digby, her friend- her old-fashioned, loyal, caring friend. He had been there for her through so much- the Polish Christmas he threw for her the first Christmas after her mother passed away, the time she got suspended by her dad, the complaint she backed against her dad, the time she overdosed, her bipolar diagnosis, and to some extent at least, her break up with Jesse.

They went into the living room and sat down on the sofa next to each other, both of them staring at the three white sticks lined up in front of them.

'If it's positive' Arthur said quietly, breaking the silence, 'what...umm...what do you want to do?'

Zosia thought. 'I don't know. I never dreamed I would get pregnant when I'm not married, especially not while I'm still training' she replied, truthfully. She looked down at her phone _'six, five, four, three...' '_ Arthur, I can't look- can you?' She asked, her chest tightening and heart starting to pound.

Arthur looked over- he had never seen Zosia look more afraid, more vulnerable. He had to be strong for her, despite his own nervousness about the result. 'Yeah...yeah of course' he smiled weakly, reaching over to the pile of tests. Zosia looked at his face, watching him intently to see if she could guess before he said anything. He was silent for a moment, and then looked her in the eyes and took her hand. 'They're all positive.'


	5. Chapter 5

'Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god' Zosia panicked, standing abruptly and starting to pace around the room. Arthur stared down at the tests, now in his hands. _'Fuck, what the fuck have we done?!'_ Zosia thought, welling up and shaking.

'Ok don't panic' Arthur stuttered. Truthfully, he'd never been more afraid in his life, but Zosia was losing it, and she needed him to be strong for them both. 'Zosia, sit down'

'I can't have an abortion Arthur, mama would never have forgiven me' she gabbled, speaking too quickly for her mind to process her thoughts.

'Ok you need to calm down and think clearly. You need to make the best decision for you, and I will support you no matter what.' Arthur said, taking her delicate hand in his. Her eyes welled up with tears, and she tried to take so,e deep breathes.

'We were careful, weren't we?' She cried, looking up into his eyes. He nodded and squeezed her hand. 'So why is this happening?! I can't kill a baby, not when I know it already has arms, legs, a brain, a beating heart...I can't...'

'...so? We're, doing this?' Arthur asked, looking over at Zosia. Zosia turned to look at him and nodded.

'We, are doing this as long as YOU want to be doing this'

Arthur smiled and pushed his glasses up his nose. It wasn't how he had imagined having his first child either, but he knew one thing- that despite his initial shock, that he was excited and thrilled. 'Of course- I'm here, whatever you decide and want to do'. Zosia smiled and Arthur held his arms out, and she lay down into them.

'You're a good man, Digby' Zosia smiled, and then she felt vomit rising from her stomach, and she leapt up and ran into the bathroom, followed closely by Arthur. As she put her head in the toilet, Arthur stood awkwardly for a moment but then kneeled next to her, rubbing small circles on her back. 'This is the beginning, Arthur- just the beginning' Zosia laughed half heartedly before she vomited again.

Zosia spent the rest of the day up and down out of bed with morning sickness, and Arthur tried his best to help and support the mother of his child. He got her black tea, dry toast and blankets and was really attentive towards her. Zosia could hardly believe how supportive he was being, and felt reassured that they were making the right decision. She was worried about Dom's reaction, downright terrified of her father's, and knew that she had to book her 12 week scan soon. But she already had support from an unexpected ally, the most important person in all of this- her baby's father.

'When are we going to tell Dom?' Arthur asked as Zosia laid in bed later that day, after the vomited had subsided a bit. Zosia shrugged, and looked worried.

'Do we have to? Can't we just pretend I'm getting fat?' Zosia pleaded, and Arthur laughed.

'Who's getting fat?' Dom asked- they hadn't heard him come in, and he leaned against Zosia's doorway, opposite Arthur who looked as white as a sheet. 'Diggers are you ok? Don't tell me you've got what Zosh has!' Dom sighed, reaching to Arthur's forehead, which Arthur smacked away.

'Huh?' Arthur responded.

'Zosia's been sick, I joked that she must have a bun in the oven but...' And Dom stopped when he noticed Zosia and Arthur glance at each other for a split second. 'Woah, hold up...am...am I right?!' He asked, raising his voice a little, although not through anger or upset, just shock. Arthur looked down and so did Zosia. Neither could think of a response quickly enough, and that confirmed to Dom all that he needed to know- his hypothesis, although for a laugh, was correct!

'Oh my god, we're having a little Digby...or will it be Marchie?' Dom smiled. Zosia and Arthur looked at each other, thrown by Dom's reaction.

'We haven't thought that far ahead...so, you're not angry?'

'No way! Oh you guys! When did this happen?!' Dom smiled, his hands to his face.

'Sacha's birthday' Zosia replied reluctantly, but she knew to tell him outright because he would only find ways to get the information out of her.

'I bet he'll be thrilled when he finds out-'

'Don't you dare say anything' Zosia warned, pointing her finger at him. Dom laughed and held his hands up.

'Say what?', winking as he hugged his flatmates. 'So, when are you telling your dad?'

 _'Oh god- that'll be a deadly experience'_ Zosia sighed, thinking to herself.


	6. Chapter 6

'So, Dr March, why am I getting reports from Mr Levy, Mr Griffin and Ms Campbell that you've been making frequent disappearances from your shifts? I thought you were giving surgery a serious try.' Guy asked, feeling concerned yet agitated at the same time. The downside to being CEO was that although Zosia was his daughter, he had a duty of care to the hospital and when his doctors were making disappearing acts, it put that duty in jeopardy.

Zosia felt herself panic but tried her best to stay composed. It was true, she had disappeared from the wards a lot over the last week or so, since she found out she was pregnant, but her morning sickness was relentless. She knew it wouldn't be long before her pregnancy became more obvious, and she was certain that now that Dom and Arthur knew, that it wouldn't be long before people started guessing. _'Just tell him, get it over and done with'_ Zosia sighed to herself internally. She closed her eyes momentarily to gather her thoughts.

'Dr March?'

 _'Oh god I can't do this, fuck'_

'Zosia?' Guy pressed, now sounding more like her father than her boss. 'Whatever it is you can tell me.'

'I'm having a baby' she blurted out before she could change her mind and work out a way of concealing her morning sickness from the world indefinitely.

Guy's face dropped in shock and horror. 'You're pregnant?'

Zosia nodded. She almost felt ashamed but she knew she had to remember what she and Arthur had decided- that they wanted to keep the baby.

'Whose is it?' He demanded, short and to the point. Zosia remained silent and Guy raised his voice, shouting 'well?! WHOSE IS IT?'

'Arthur's' She stuttered. Guy looked shocked and upset. 'I'm ten weeks...it must have happened after Sacha's birthday...'

'When you were drunk, you mean?' He snapped, harshly. Zosia was fighting the urge to run out of the office but she knew that now, of all times, she had to be mature, even if her father was going to test her boundaries and push her buttons.

'That's not what I had in mind when I asked Dr Digby to keep an eye on you that night...for gods sake Zosia, how many times have I told you, use protection, wait until you're married until you have children-'

'We did, dad! We did. It isn't his fault, he didn't take advantage.'

Guy sat on the edge of his desk, he head in his hands. 'What about your career?' He asked, clearly sounding exasperated as he gestured with his hands out in front of him.

'I plan to finish my F2 year, take a break when the baby comes, and come back a year later for CT1'

'We both know you'll never come back! Zosia how could you be so thoughtless?!'

'Dad, I-' Zosia began, but Guy interrupted.

'I can't look at you right now, just go!' he shouted, ushering her towards the door. She tried to argued, but before she knew it the door was being slammed in her face. ' _Well that went as well as expected…'_


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N Thank you to NiamhMcGrady-Fanpage and guest for your reviews, it means a lot**

 **I meant to change Chapter 6 slightly- she told Guy when she was 12 weeks, not 10- with that in mind, this chapter should make a little more sense**

Despite having the feeling that telling her father wasn't going to go well, Zosia still felt emotional and overwhelmed just by how harsh his reaction was. She hurried through the corridors and the wards of the hospital until she reached the lift, jumping in at the last second, to the ground floor but when the lift opened, she was abruptly met by Jesse and Colette on their way back from Pulses. The aroma from their coffees in their hand reached Zosia almost instantly and she felt her stomach churn.

'Hey Zosh, how's it- hey, are you ok?!' Jesse asked worriedly, seeing the colour drop from his ex-girlfriends face and she ran into the toilets. Colette and Jesse exchanged a worried glance before heading in the same direction.

Zosia threw herself into a cubicle and without having the chance to lock the door, or even close it, threw herself into her knees as she wretched and vomited. She didn't even notice that her dad's friends had followed her in and had heard everything. Jesse approached her and out his hand on her back in an attempt to comfort her while Colette grabbed a cup from Pulses to get her some water.

'Fuck off Jesse!' She shouted as she felt his hand on her back, the last thing she wanted was her ex-boyfriend to know anything about her situation, even though he was bound to find out from Guy eventually.

'Woah, calm down' he retreated his hand but remained kneeling next to her. Her stomach hurt from the amount of vomiting she was doing the past few days. 'This has been happening a lot lately, hasn't it? Is everything ok?' He asked, concerned, seeing her put her hands on her stomach and close her eyes, as if she was in pain.

'I'm fine' she snapped. It struck Jesse and Colette that she was a lot snappier than usual the last couple of weeks, and coupled with her frequent disappearances to the ladies, they guessed that something was troubling the young doctor they had known since she was a child.

'Zosia, this is us you're talking to. I'm going to ask you a simple question, ok? Are you pregnant?!'

'Shut up' Zosia groaned- she was in pain from vomiting, her head throbbed and her stomach still wouldn't settle, and she was hoping that if she snapped at them enough, they would leave her alone. However, she underestimated how resilient the pair were, and they weren't going anywhere until they had some answers.

'You are aren't you?! Is it mine?'

'Ha!' Zosia laughed, finally summoning the energy to stand and step out of the toilets. 'No don't worry, you're safe there...honestly Jesse, did you go to med school? If it was yours I would be the size of a house and ready to drop by now'

'Silly question...' He replied, slowly, taking it in. 'So you are?'

'...Yes' she sighed, heavily. Colette passed her some water and she took it gratefully. She wanted to lie, but she knew that there was no point.

'How far gone are you?' Colette asked, shocked but trying to be supportive.

'I have my 12 week scan tomorrow' Zosia replied, honestly.

'Wow, I cant believe it, our little Zoshie' Jesse smiled. 'Does your old man know?' He asked, suddenly remembering that his reaction was unlikely to be as accepting as theirs. Zosia's face dropped, and she looked down, shuffling her feet uncomfortably. 'That well, huh?'

'Kicking me out of his office and slamming the door in my face' kind of well' she winced as she passed her hand over her abdomen. She took a cleansing breath and Colette out her hand on Zosia's shoulder.

'You ok?' She asked. Zosia nodded slowly and then tears welled up. Colette saw this and pulled her into a hug. 'He'll come round, he always does'

'Do you know who the dad is?' Jesse asked, and Zosia's shot him a glare. W _hat kind of a question is that?!_

 _'_ Yes' she snapped. 'And before you ask, yes, he is going to be involved'.

'Are you going to tell us who it is?' Colette asked, raising her eyebrows. Zosia smiled a little. 'I didn't know you were seeing anyone'

'I want to keep you all in suspense. I need to talk to him about how we make the announcement' she smiled. 'Look, but I'd better go' she smiled slightly as she exited the toilets and made her way back up to Keller.

'Well. That was unexpected' Colette sighed, finally feeling able to express the shock at Zosia's situation.

'She'll be fine, Col- she's as tough as old boots, just like her mother' Jesse reassured her.


	8. Chapter 8

'Zosh, what time is the scan?' Arthur called out of the bathroom, knowing that Zosia was waiting by the door to come in and use the shower.

'10' she replied, looking at her phone and then rolling her eyes before banging on the door.

'Arthur anyone would think you're the woman in this flat, hurry up!' she huffed as the door clicked open and Arthur stepped out in his towel looking flustered.

'I never get to spend more than 10 minutes in the bathroom in the morning' he muttered before glancing down at Zosia's barely swollen abdomen. She had a really tiny bump, only obvious to those who knew she was pregnant.

'Sorry' she sang as she pranced into the bathroom. 'By the way, I told my dad, Jesse and Colette- guess which two were happy about it?'

Arthur froze. 'What? Oh no' he sighed, raising his hand to his head as he walked away from the bathroom. 'Did your dad go mental?'

'Yep' she called out, removing her dressing gown and pyjamas and climbing into the shower. 'God knows what he'll be like today...I've never seen him so angry...I'd watch out if I were you, he'll probably get us both cleaning bedpans and doing bloods all day'

'Zosh I'm supposed to be assisting him in theatre this afternoon! Oh god he's going to crucify me'

'He'll hang you up by the nether region' Dom helpfully added as he strolled past the bathroom on his way into the kitchen.

'Yeah thanks Dom' he sighed as he rested his head in his hands, shaking his head.

That morning, after an hour of her shift, Zosia and Arthur made their way up to maternity- Arthur's shift started a little later than Zosia's so he was able to attend without people being suspicious about why they disappeared together. Zosia had managed to get Colette and Jesse to tell Sacha that she was needed on AAU to work with Ms Campbell, and he seemed to buy it. Up in the waiting area of the ward, they sat outside the office of Mr T and although Zosia had been excited all morning, she was now quiet, fidgety and pale. Arthur looked over at his friend and comfortingly put a hand on her shoulder.

'It'll be ok Zosh' he smiled reassuringly, even though he felt just as nervous as she did on the inside.

'What if there's a problem? What if there isn't a baby there at all?'

'Zosia, everything that suggests you're pregnant is there. I know it's nerve wracking but try to relax, we're seeing our baby'

'It doesn't feel real yet' she admitted, playing with her sleeve. Arthur had noticed that she always did that when she was nervous so he reached over, took her hand and held it. She looked up at him and smiled. He knew she was grateful.

'Zosia, Arthur, good to see you! Do come in!' Mr T smiled, as he propped the doorway open for his two colleagues to enter. They stood and then just as Zosia was about to enter, she froze on the spot. Arthur took her hand again and held it close to him. She took a deep breath and entered the room. 'Ok Zosia, if you'd like to pop up onto the bed, we can have a bit of a chat and then get down to it!'

Zosia did as she was asked, and then he asked Zosia to roll her top up a bit, which she did. _Oh god, what if something is wrong?!_ She thought and Mr T could see she looked a little anxious.

'Well, the tiny bump is always a good sign' he smiled. 'Now this is going to be cold, brace yourself' he warned as he squeezed some clear gel onto Zosia's tiny, tiny bump, and she winced, grabbing Arthur's hand.

'Sorry' she laughed, and then Mr T pressed a probe to her abdomen and then smiled. 'Yes, you're definitely 12 weeks' he smiled as he measured the baby, and then checked for a heartbeat, which rang loud and clear. Everyone smiled. 'Such a beautiful sound' Zosia smiled just as Mr T turned the screen around for them to see. Both the parents-to-be's mouths dropped open as they took in the monkey nut shaped blob on the screen in front of them. Their monkey nut.

Mr T pointed out the head, heart, brain, an arm and leg, and then Zosia welled up. 'That's our baby' she cried as Arthur quickly wiped his eyes to hide the fact that he had welled up too. Mr T proceeded to measure the fluid around the baby's neck, which was fine, and he was happy with the position of the placenta.

They left the scan with a copy of the picture each, and just before they reentered Keller Ward, Zosia threw herself into Arthur's arms. 'Thank you' she wept as he held her tightly. 'I can't believe we're having a baby, THIS baby' she smiled, but then she caught sight of her father down the corridor and she quickly pulled away.

'Not exactly appropriate Dr March' he scolded, sternly, not stopping to talk, but glaring at Arthur before slamming the door of his office. Zosia and Arthur winced, and Arthur could tell Zosia felt uneasy. He hugged her, just as Colette and Jesse found them.

'How did it go?' Colette smiled eagerly, and Jesse looked at Arthur confused.

'Frank?! Why do I get the feeling that you're involved in this?!' He asked as Colette smacked him in the arm.

'Err, well, yes it is my baby, so...' Arthur stuttered as Zosia and Colette laughed. Zosia passed Colette and Jesse her picture and they smiled at it.

'Looks like Frank!' Jesse teased as Zosia hit him in the same way Colette just had. 'Have you shown your old man?'

Zosia sighed, and looked at his office door. 'No, he's still really mad- I can't stand that I've let him down, I'm terrified I'm going to be a shit mother, but I already love our little monkey nut' she said, welling up. 'But I can't do this with him mad at me'

'We can talk to him if you like?' Jesse and Colette offered. Arthur and Zosia looked at each other before nodding.


	9. Chapter 9

'You know, don't you?' Guy asked as Jesse and Colette came towards him in the office. Jesse had the scan picture that Zosia had given him to show Guy, as she was too afraid to come herself. Both Jesse and Colette nodded, and Guy hung his head, looking deflated.

'What am I supposed to do?' Guy asked, sounding desperate. 'She's still so young, with her whole career ahead of her...'

'Guy, I think you need to remember that Zosia is 27...that's older than you and Anya were when you had her...' Colette began

'And she's the kinda girl who would take maternity leave and then come back to her training, she's got a career head on her. There's no reason why her life has to stop just because she's having a baby, and Arthur's alright! He's going to be there, I know he is' Jesse continued honestly, with his hand on Guy's shoulder. Colette nodded. Guy took the scan picture that was in Jesse's hand and looked at it. It brought back memories of when Anya had her twelve week scan which revealed their baby, the baby that would grow up to be a beautiful, funny, intelligent young woman. He sighed.

'And if she doesn't?'

'That's up to her, Guy...I hate to say it, but your baby girl isn't a baby anymore...she can make her own decisions. But seriously, you need to decide whether you're in this or not, because she needs you. She needs all of us, because despite the love she already has for her baby, she needs you to be strong for her- she wants Anya, and she's heartbroken that she feels she's let you down'

'Of course she hasn't let me down' Guy sighed, upset. He sat down. 'She could never let me down'

'Then you need to tell her...' Colette replied, simply and to the point but sympathetically. She would never understand what Guy is going through but having been a family friend for over 15 years, she knew that despite Guy's favour towards a career, that his daughter meant more to him than she realised, and that if there was going to be a time where he tells her, then surely that would be now.

Meanwhile, Zosia was busying herself on Keller, ordering tests for several patients and conversing professionally with various nurses, and then Dom and Arthur came over, wanting to talk to her. Arthur was concerned that the mother of his child was taking on a lot more work than she usually did, staying late and getting in early, and not taking many breaks. Dom had noticed this too, and although his concern wasn't on the same level as Arthur's he couldn't deny that her behaviour was strange.

'Zosia, we need to talk' Arthur began.

'No, I'm busy' she muttered, barely making eye contact. She stared down at one of the pages of one of the 6 files she had in her arms.

'Zosh, you need to take it easy' Dom added. 'You're running yourself ragged'

'I don't want Mr Self to have any excuse to tell me I can't cope with being pregnant and doing my training' she snapped in a half-whisper- she didn't want her colleagues to know about the baby yet. As she carried on past her two flatmates, her father stepped onto the ward. Arthur and Dom saw him and scuttled away and as Zosia turned to walk away, Guy's voice bcalled after her.

'Dr March, a word? On call room, please' he requested, an air of presence about him.

'I'm busy' she replied, expressionless. She went to tend to one of her patients but Guy called after her again, slightly louder this time.

'Now, Dr March'. Zosia stopped, rolled her eyes and turned towards him. He was waiting for her, arms folded and his face not giving anything away. Along with her stubbornness, she got her poker face from him, only those truly close to her had learnt to read her by her face, and even then it took a lot of practise and a lot of trust.

She entered the on-call room and her father entered behind her, shutting the door to stop them from being interrupted. Zosia stood by the window, her back to the CEO. Guy was hoping that Zosia would be the first to speak, but when it was obvious to him just how much of a mood she was in, he broke the silence.

'The scan...Jesse showed me...it...well, it reminded me of you...did you know that at one of mama's scans, it looked like you were waving to us?' He smiled, remembering that time fondly, and taking a step towards her. Zosia remained with her back to her father, and shook her head.

'What did you want dad?' She asked. She was fed up with always having to try and guess what his motives were.

'I fell in love with you instantly when I saw the screen for the first time...I always loved you, even before, but when it finally felt real it hit me hard...I think it's the same now'. He said, taking a little step closer. Zosia didn't respond, and Guy started to feel really guilty. He sighed and held out his arms. When he didn't respond, Zosia turned around and saw Guy with his arms opened up to her. She was confused, reluctant even, but she knew in her heart of hearts, she wanted her dad's support, so she moved towards him. As he placed his arms around her, she relaxed into them and hugged him back.

'I'm sorry I didn't take the news well...its just, I can't believe my baby is all grown up' he sighed as Zosia pulled away.

'Your baby grew up a long time ago' she replied. 'Dad...Arthur and I...we're going to keep the baby'

'I can't believe you're making me a grandfather' he sighed but then smiled. 'And although I was angry to begin with, I'm happy for you darling, mama would have been thrilled.

'Even though Arthur and I aren't together?' Zosia replied, her eyes watering. She missed her mama so much and would give anything for her to be there. Guy noticed this and smiled weakly, putting a comforting hand on his daughter's shoulder.

'You know, Zoshie, you weren't planned either, but you're still the best thing that ever happened to us. Everything happens for a reason, and your little one will be born into a loving family'

'What if I'm not ready? What if I can't be a good mum?' Zosia whispered, tears flowing down her face. Her father took her in his arms and kissed her temple.

'You will be ready because you'll have Arthur, and you'll have me, Jesse, Colette, Dr Copeland...we're all here to help you and Arthur get ready for parenthood.' Zosia felt relieved that her father was putting her worries to rest, and Guy realised that despite her 27 years of age, his baby girl still needed him.

'Dad?'

'Yes darling?'

'I love you' she smiled, tears still flowing, moving into him again.

'I love you too...so very, very much' he replied, putting his arms around her tightly.


	10. Chapter 10

'I really don't think it's a good idea!' Arthur argued as he fiddled with the lock on their front door as they arrived home after a long shift.

'Tell me Arthur, exactly why isn't it a good idea? Because I might go drinking all the alcohol that I'm not allowed to drink anymore?' She shouted, sarcastically. Dom sat down in the arm chair as they entered the flat and watched his two housemates argue over whether to go to one of the nurses' leaving do the next evening. 'Don't you think that I am responsible enough to not drink when I've got this to think about?!' Zosia shouted, pointing both of her forefingers to her abdomen.

'No, of course I don't think you'll be irresponsible, I just worry that something might happen..'

'For gods sake, Arthur, I'm pregnant, not ill. If this is what it's going to be like for the next 6 months, then I swear to god-' she continued to raise her voice, and then Dom saw fit to step in.

'Honestly you two, it's like watching EastEnders.' Dom quipped, rolling his eyes. 'I almost want to grab some popcorn and watch but I can't do it. Arthur, Zosia is right. She's a responsible adult-' to which Zosia smiled at- '...sometimes' which caused her to glare at him, 'but you need to trust her. She's not going to do anything that'll affect the baby'

'I know...I'm just, I don't know...I just don't want anything to happen' Arthur admitted as he sat down and out his head in his hands, and Dom stepped into his bedroom to fetch something. Zosia sat down next to him and turned towards him.

'And you think I would risk miscarrying for the sake of having a few drinks for someone I'd call an acquaintance, at best?' Zosia said, welling up. _'God these fucking hormones'_ she thought to herself.

'Oh no, no, please don't cry- I was being stupid and wasn't thinking, please' Arthur panicked and then Dom re-entered, instantly confused as to why his pregnant flat mate was in tears.

'Diggers don't tell me you made your baby-mummy cry?!' He asked, sitting down next to Zosia and putting an arm around her, but she stood abruptly and stormed off to her bedroom. When she thought about it reasonably, she knew it was her hormones making her more sensitive, but her pregnant baby-brain was still offended that Arthur would think she'd risk their child's life. _Fucking Digby_ she thought, as she sat on her bed and reached over to her scan photo which was sitting on top of her bedside cabinet before lying down, holding the picture in front of her.

' _Why would he think I'd do something to lose you, eh?_ ' She thought to herself, as if she was thinking to her bump. As she thought this, she ran her hand slowly over her abdomen. ' _They're right, I'm definitely getting a bump_ '

She was brought out of her thoughts by a tapping on the door. She ignored it for a moment but then Arthur opened the door slowly, and poked his head around the door. Zosia sat up and glared at him and he smiled awkwardly.

'Zosh, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to upset you, I'm just so excited about the idea of being a dad, it's just making me paranoid.' He tried to explain and then Zosia nodded.

'I'm sorry too. I'm going to blame the hormones' she reluctantly added and then Arthur opened the door more fully.

'Come on, Dom's suggested we all go out for dinner...mostly because he forgot to go shopping' he laughed slightly, watching for his friends facial expression. After a moment or two it softened, and she nodded and stood up.

'Sorry Diggers...I guess now would be a good time to warn you that I've heard pregnancy makes fiery women practically erupt...' She laughed a little as Arthur nodded.

'Well, be that as it may, we'll get you through it. It'll all be worth it' he smiled.

'I still can't believe it. I've even found myself talking to monkey-nut a lot lately' Zosia laughed and Arthur did as well.

'I didn't mean to upset you earlier. I know you'll do everything you can to protect monkey-nut, and I know I can't wrap you up in cotton wool for the rest of he pregnancy...just, yeah, I'm sorry'. _Bless him- maybe I was a little harsh._

'And I may have flown off the handle a little' Zosia admitted, smiling slightly. 'So are we going tomorrow or not?'

'Yeah. Yeah we'll all go' he smiled. 'Anyway, grab your coat, Dom said something about a 'cheeky nandos'...how that differs from a normal nandos, I'll never know.'

'Oh please don't tell me he actually referred to it as 'cheeky'' Zosia laughed, picking up a jacket and her handbag and towards the front door.

'Oh no, really, he did' Arthur laughed back, following her out and locking the door behind him.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N Huge thanks to NiamhMcGrady-fanpage and perpetualpathology for your kind reviews on my previous chapters!**

 **Hope you all enjoy this chapter!**

Keller was apocalyptically busy one shift a week after the scan- so much so that all three juniors had to work overtime to keep up with the theatre demands. Following an emergency appendectomy, sorting an intracerebral haemorrhage and removing part of someone's skull from a severe fracture, she hurried into the locker room in an attempt to catch 5 minutes to herself. Her feet were killing her, she hadn't been able to eat since before she arrived on shift 16 hours ago, and despite her father now being supportive of her pregnancy, he assumed she was taking breaks when in fact she was being dragged into Keller's other theatre to assist with something else when she was supposed to be resting.

Arthur had a similar idea to Zosia as he came into the locker room and went into his locker. Zosia was sitting on the bench, her elbows on her knees and her head in her hands. _'Relax, you're just tired'_ she tried to reason with herself as her head swirled and stomach jumped hoops. 'Are you ok Zosh?' Arthur smiled. 'Have you had a break?' He asked but became increasingly concerned as he walked over as he could see she was pale and shaking slightly. 'Zosh?' He repeated as she sat down next to her.

'I'm fine' she blurted out, taking more deep breathes. Her ears started ringing, her vision blurring. 'Arthur I think I'm going to f-' she mumbled as she slumped into Arthur. Arthur froze for a second before remembering he was doctor and the person who had just collapsed onto him wasn't just a colleague or a friend, but also the mother of his child.

'Zosh? Zosia?' He panicked as he laid her on the ground. 'Can I get some help in here please?!'

He shouted out hoping some passing people may hear him as he put her onto her side in case she vomited. Thankfully, the door swung open and Sacha ran in just as Zosia was coming round. _'What the hell?_

'What happened Arthur?' Sacha asked.

'She was really pale and then just collapsed' Arthur gabbled as he saw Zosia's eyes open and she began to sit up. 'No Zosia, don't try and sit up, just stay still'.

'Ok, let's get her into the oncall room, I'll page Mr Self' Sacha said, as he went to pick Zosia up bridal style. She went to argue but she was exhausted and didn't have the energy to fight back so she let him carry her out of the locker room and next door to the on call room. _Oh god, now we're going to have to tell him..._

'Mr Levy, there's something we need to tell you' Arthur began but Zosia immediately glared at him. 'Zosh, he needs to know' he whispered as Zosia then rolled her eyes defeated. _For fuck sake…I was hoping to keep it quiet until I was showing…_

'What is it?' He asked, as he lay Zosia down on the bed and taking his pager out of his pocket.

'She's 13 weeks pregnant' Arthur stuttered nervously. Sacha looked shocked.

'And neither of you thought to tell me when I told you this was going to be a nightmare shift? Wow...that aside, congratulations Zosia'

'Thanks' she mumbled. 'And Arthur'

'You two? Having a baby?!' He smiled. 'Congratula-' he began before Zosia sat up and stood abruptly. She threw her hand over her mouth and one hand in her stomach. 'Whoa ok, bowl, Arthur!' Sacha demanded as he supported Zosia in case she fainted again. He stroked her arm reassuringly and held onto her as Arthur shoved the bowl in front of Zosia's face and she threw up violently. 'You ok?' He asked reassuringly and Zosia shook her head. 'I'm going to sit you down then I'll run some tests, ok?' He smiled kindly and she nodded. 'Does your dad know?' He asked as he and Arthur slowly manoeuvred her towards the bed where they lay her down and raised her legs on some pillows.

'Yeah he knows' she mumbled.

'Ok, well I've paged him to come down here, I think it's best that he knows. I'd like to run a couple of tests but I suspect you're exhausted, low blood sugar, maybe dehydrated as well' he smiled. As he stepped out the room, Zosia remained lying down and Arthur took her hand.

'I'm sorry for scaring you' Zosia said eventually. She knew she should have been taking more breaks but she also didn't want anyone to think she wasn't up to working- she'd spent a lot time rebuilding her confidence and her capability to work since being diagnosed as bipolar, nothing was going to stand in her way. She was struggling adjusting to the fact that she was pregnant and that therefore her body needed to take things easy.

'It's ok, I'm just worried about you. You haven't had a break since you got in, have you?'

Zosia shook her head and at that moment, the door swung open and Guy hurried towards his daughter.

'Zoshie! I heard you had a turn, are you ok?!' He asked, pulling her into a hug. She nodded.

'I'm fine, dad. I feel sick and a bit dizzy still, but Mr Levy thinks it's exhaustion and low blood sugar' she explained.

'And Mr Levy is running tests, yes?' He asked, wrapping his arm around her shoulder supportively, and Zosia nodded. 'Good...oh darling I thought...well, it doesn't matter now. I want you to rest up in here today, and then I'm forcing you to take the rest of the week off, I don't want to see you back here until Saturday at the earliest, is that understood?'

'But dad-'

'Zoshie, I don't want to hear that you've collapsed again, it could be a lot worse next time unless we let you fully recover. Besides, you're owed some time off'.

'Dad-'

'I won't tell you again.' He said sternly. 'I'm sorry darling but that's the final word'.

 _Why was I so stupid? Why did I push myself so hard?! Now I've got my dad looking over my shoulder for the whole pregnancy, and Sacha is going to be a nightmare. Oh and Arthur…he is sweet, but all that worrying…_

Zosia stayed in the on call room, sleeping, until the end of the shift, after which time Guy drove all three juniors back to their flat. When they arrived home, Zosia was still incredibly tired so she went straight to bed, and Arthur and Dom sat and ate together.

'Do you think she's ok?' Arthur worried as Dom ate some pasta.

'Pregnancy makes you exhausted, even though your love child is the size of a plum, it saps you of energy. I'm not surprised she collapsed, she's never been one to take things easy, has she? At least now she knows that she can't push herself as hard as she did today, not unless she wants Sacha and Mr Self on her case'

'That's true...' Arthur replied, a little distracted. Dom could sense something else was on Arthur's mind, and he was going to make it his mission to find out.

'Diggers, what's wrong?' Dom asked.

'Huh?'

'Something is on your mind, spill' Dom smiled cheekily.

Arthur paused for a moment. He was feeling different, he couldn't figure it out, but he felt more than just concern for Zosia. He was excited about having a baby, but in the many thoughts he had about it, he realised that his happiness wasn't just that he was going to be a dad, but he was going to be a dad with Zosia as the child's mum. They had something that bonded them now, and that excited him. He enjoyed spending time with her, and the feelings he had reminded him of his feelings towards Chantelle. He had always had a soft spot for his colleague, despite the fact that she did his head in sometimes. Maybe...just maybe, he liked her. And that certainly changed things.

'Diggers!' Dom raised his voice, not angrily, but just enough to break Arthur out of his daydream.

'Huh?' Arthur replied, looking at him.

'Never mind. But I know something is on your mind, and I will find out eventually' Dom smiled cheekily.


	12. Chapter 12

'Did you know that by now, the baby will have learnt how to suck its thumb? How cute is that?' a 16 week pregnant Zosia announced as she sat behind the nurses station with Arthur and Dom. 'I read it in 'what to expect when you're expecting' last night'. She was on a break reading the same book. Her breaks were now being monitored, ordered and enforced by Sacha and Guy following her collapse 3 weeks before, and Arthur and Dom were doing various paperwork.

'Really?' Arthur smiled, as he reached over and stroked her bump. It had weirded Zosia out to begin with when Arthur would touch her stomach but now that her bump was slowly growing, she felt less awkward about it.

'Do you feel monkey nut moving at all?'

'Not obviously...he or she probably does have a little fidget every now and then, but their movements can be easily mistaken for something else, like stomach rumbling or butterflies. It shouldn't be too long before I start feeling actual movements though, apparently' she replied, pointing back to an open page in her book.

'I can't wait' Arthur smiled and Dom rolled his eyes. 'What?' Arthur sighed, catching their flat mates facial expression. Dom looked at he pair and put his pen down.

'Nothing' he smiled, before standing up and walking off. Part of them felt that maybe Dom was feeling a little out of place, what with him being the only one in their little threesome not directly involved with the pregnancy, and Dom being Dom wanted to make them second guess his motives behind the odd little comment, just for mischief.

 **Later that evening in the flat**

'So I'll probably be back late, unless I'm getting lucky, in which case I won't be back at all' Dom smirked that evening as he put his white sneakers and beanie hat on. He was on his way out to a date and Arthur was planning on treating Zosia to dinner that evening.

'Don't do anything we wouldn't do' Zosia called out of her bedroom as she got changed.

'Selfie, I don't think even I could surpass you and Digby...' He teased. In reality, he knew nothing of their sex life, other than that they happened to conceive on one occasion, but he enjoyed winding them up all the same. 'Right, I'm off' he called out as he closed the door behind him.

After a lovely meal and conversation, Zosia noticed that she was feeling different. Warm, almost. She enjoyed Arthur's company but it was like she didn't particularly want Dom to come home yet, she hoped he would stay out. As they sat to watch a film together, she cuddled into him and he put his arm around her. She looked up at him slowly and as she moved, he looked down. She looked up at him and momentarily they looked into each others eyes and moved closer and closer together until their soft lips grazed, and then started kissing. It felt like time had stopped but their hearts beat faster, the kissing got deeper and then Zosia reached down to Arthur's waistband on his trousers.

'Shall we?' She whispered, looking into Arthur's eyes, which he noticed had a glint in. The same glint as the night 16 weeks ago that changed their lives.

'Yep!' Arthur quickly obliged, jumping up and picking Zosia up bridal style and carrying her into her bedroom.

The next morning, Zosia woke up lying next to Arthur and instead of regret, she felt happy. She felt loved and... _squishy._ She smiled to herself and poked Arthur who jumped out of his skin but still appeared to be asleep.

'Dominic, why are you in my room?' He mumbled, his eyes still closed.

'Arthur, this is Zosia, and you're in my room' she laughed and then his eyes flew open.

'I knew that' he stumbled on his words as he sat up. Zosia stood to put her pyjamas on and Arthur looked on somewhat adoringly. She put on an oversized checked shirt which hung gently over her small rounded bump, and he could hardly believe his luck. After gazing for what felt like ages, he was snapped out of his thoughts.

'Digby? Did you hear any of that?' Zosia laughed, sitting next to him.

'Sorry' he mumbled, reaching for his glasses which he had carefully placed on Zosia's bedside table.

'I was just saying, I enjoyed last night...it was, nice' she smiled. _I don't think he was paying attention..._ Arthur smiled back and agreed with her. He loved how Zosia's cheeks blushed a little and how happy she looked. He stood up and got dressed. 'I didn't hear Dom come back...so I'm guessing he got lucky' Zosia laughed as she stepped out of her room. _And at least we can keep our secret a little longer..._

'So would 16 weeks be when your libido is through the roof, by any chance?' Dom grimaced, looking in Zosia's book as the pair emerged from Zosia's bedroom. They froze in their tracks.

'Wh- we didn't hear you come in last night?!' They stuttered. Dom looked at them with his eyebrows raised.

'I'm surprised you remembered the concept of time altogether, I heard what must have been the majority of your...shenanigans...' He shuddered. _Oh my god, fucking hell!_ Zosia was horribly embarrassed, as was Arthur who had just gone to hide in his room.

'So are you two...?' Dom smiled cheekily, raising one eyebrow as Zosia sat down next to him on the sofa.

'No, no...it's just...well, you read the book..' _Why the hell am I talking to Dom about this? And so what if I slept with Arthur again...he makes me feel good and uncomplicated..._

Dom raised his eyebrow. 'Well please can I have some warning next time? It was mildly traumatic arriving home and hearing...that' he shuddered before winking. Zosia smiled sarcastically and she knew she had to change the subject.

'Anyway how was the date?' She asked, smoothing her hands over her bump.

'A disaster, he wasn't nearly as good looking as his photo...Elmer Fudd comes to mind' he frowned and Zosia struggled to keep a straight face. She encouraged him to keep talking about it in the hope that he would forget about her and Arthur...it we like trying to distract a child and she made a mental note to remember this technique for when her little one arrived.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N again, a huge thanks to NiamhMcGrady-fanpage and perpetualpathology for the kind reviews, it really does motivate me to keep writing**

 **I apologise if this chapter isn't great…I needed to have a chapter as a filler so that my plans for later chapters make a bit more sense, so please bear with me- thank you!**

The three junior doctors arrived on Keller for their shift 10 minutes early, and Zosia, although still embarrassed from earlier that morning, was full of energy and in a really good mood. Not just because she was now free of morning sickness and was able to sleep well again, but work was going well and the father of her baby made her feel wanted, even with her expanding abdomen, which was of comfort to her.

'Pregnancy suits her' Sacha laughed, 'well done Arthur, you seem to have tamed the lioness'

'Bleurgh' Dom grimaced jokingly and Arthur shot him a glare, which Sacha picked up on.

'Everything okay?' He asked, looking at the pair, but he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

'Taming is one word for it' Dom muttered and Arthur shook his head.

'So immature' he replied, shaking his head and looking directly at his flatmate, dumbfounded.

Sacha had no idea what was going on but realised he shouldn't have asked, so he gave them their patients and they joined Zosia's ranks at neighbouring bedsides. As Zosia was reading a chart, Arthur was doing the same and they momentarily glanced and smiled at each other.

'Right Mrs Hendrix, I'm just going to examine your abdomen, ok?' Zosia smiled at her patient, and carried on with her work.

Later that morning, Zosia was wandering the ward, about to tend to her patient when she felt something weird in one side of her bump. It felt like gas bubbles but more intense, and after a moment or two she realised that she was feeling her baby kicking for the first time! She placed her hands on her bump with wonder, and shot glances around the ward for Arthur. She turned around and he was approaching her- he'd looked up from some test results and smiled at her.

'Hey, Zosh, are you-' Arthur began but he was cut off by being dragged into the nearby locker room. 'What, now?! Wow you're insatiable' Arthur's shock turned into a flirtatious smirk.

'No, Arthur, feel!' She excitedly squealed as she grabbed Arthur's hand and held it to her bump, and as the sensation moved, she held his hand in the place where her baby was kicking the wall of her uterus, and Arthur's eyes welled up at the amazing sensations he was feeling.

'Oh my god' he stuttered, smiling and looking down with amazement and awe.

'I know' she cried, smiling. 'Makes it all seem a lot more real doesn't it?'

Arthur nodded and then put his arms around her and she moved into them, putting her arms around his back. _Why is he so lovely? Maybe there is supposed to be something between us...but what if he doesn't feel the same way? It'll be awkward, life changing even. Oh god, Zosia, why do you always do this?!_

 _'_ Woah monkey's really going for it now' she smiled, in a bid to distract herself from her thoughts _. Thanks little one_ she smiled to herself.

'That's amazing' he smiled. He couldn't believe how happy he was about their situation. The only way it could be more perfect would be if the two of them made their relationship official. But that would never happen, he thought to himself.

'Arthur? You're staring' Zosia said to try and bring Arthur out of his daydream. He snapped out back into the real world and smiled. 'Anyway, we'd best get on' she added, as she hugged him and went on her way.

 **Later that evening**

'Sacha's right, you're in a freakishly good mood...what's up?' Dom asked, sitting at the breakfast bar where Zosia was chopping vegetables to go in the stir-fries that Arthur was making for the three of them.

'We felt the baby move for the first time today' she smiled. 'It just makes it all feel real'

'Wow, that's brilliant' Dom replied, picking up a packet of fresh green and red birds eye chillies. 'Are you sure chillies are a good idea? We don't want little Diggers to be born all angry or anything, I'd be angry if I was force fed chillies.'

'Good point, it'll probably give me horrendous indigestion' she winced as she put the unchopped chillies back in the fridge. 'Arthur this smells amazing' she smiled as he passed her and Dom a plate each.

They'd agreed to have an evening in together so they watched a film, and although Zosia was in a good mood, she was also tired and ended up falling asleep on the armchair. When the film finished, the two men looked over at Zosia who looked peaceful and happy.

'I'll get her a blanket' Arthur volunteered as Dom stood and said goodnight.

When Arthur returned, he sat watching her and as he moved towards her to cover her with a blanket, he kneeled down and stroked her hair, without realising that the whole time, Dom was watching.

'You like her' a voice came out of nowhere, breaking Arthur out of his daydream.

'What? No, you're crazy' Arthur stuttered, standing up quickly and looking at his flatmate.

'No, you like her, that's what's been going on with you!' Dom gasped, looking at him and then at Zosia who was still asleep. Arthur grabbed Dom's arm and dragged him into his bedroom to try and not wake Zosia up or have her hear their conversation. However, it was too late- Zosia was awake and she was now all too aware of Arthur dragging Dom into his bedroom. She stood and crept to the doorway.

Arthur was mortified, and he knew that there was no denying his feelings towards Zosia. 'So are you going to admit it?' Dom teased, but Arthur wasn't in the mood for teasing.

'Ok! You win, I like her' Arthur blurted as he sat down on his bed and held his head in his hands.

Dom stood looking shocked. 'I like her...a lot...' He stuttered. _'Oh. My. God.'_ Zosia thought to herself, but then she couldn't help but smile.

'Well good luck' Dom replied sarcastically. 'I know you're having this baby together and everything, but don't get your hopes up Diggers. You two are so different...I'd love to see you both happy together but just don't be surprised if she sees you more as a friend...albeit a close one...she's hardly sentimental when it comes to sex' he pointed out. _Arsehole_ Zosia grumbled. She decided to put Arthur out of his misery, and also to prove Dom wrong. _He can't be right about everything._

'Arthur, can I have a word?' She asked coyly as she tapped on and opened Arthur's bedroom door to find the men looking like they'd seen a ghost. Dom exited the room and Zosia had to try hard not to glare at him. Deep down she knew that he was usually right about her...but this was different. Yes, she and Arthur were different and she wouldn't have put them together a year ago, but she knew in her heart of hearts that she was fond of Arthur...enough to want to pursue a relationship, and given her track record with men, that was something of a miracle in itself.

'What's up?' Arthur smiled. He looked a little embarrassed, flustered even, so she just moved into him and he put his arms around her.

'What's this for?' He smiled, and Zosia welled up.

'I don't know' she wept. 'I just, I never expected any of this to be happening and now that it is, I'm excited and happy and...it's made me realise...we've been having fun right?'

'Yes, definitely' he replied, looking confused. Zosia took a deep breath to steady her nerves.

'I heard you' she blurted out, making eye contact with the doctor who suddenly looked embarrassed. He quickly backed away, and rubbed the back of his neck, whilst looking down.

'Oh...' Arthur replied. He felt stupid, but he wasn't prepared for Zosia's response…

'So I'm gonna make this easy for you. I've been wondering... whether the man who got me pregnant...might just be the man I'm supposed to be with' she replied shyly and nervously. She looked at at Arthur hoping to see some reaction...

Arthur was stunned. For weeks he had hoped that they could have their fairytale relationship but he convinced himself that as with every woman, apart from Chantelle, that she wouldn't love him in the same way, yet here she was.

'I'd love to give us a go' Arthur replied, taking her hands in his.

'You need to tell me something though- you need to tell me that these feelings you have aren't just because I'm pregnant'

'The baby, it's just sped up what I wanted anyway. I've always had...feelings, Zosia. Always'

'Well one of us had to be upfront' she teased, and Arthur smiled.

Meanwhile Dom was listening from the other side of the door. 'Wow...I did NOT see this one coming...' He said to himself, before letting out a small smile. As much as he enjoyed teasing the pair, he couldn't deny that he was happy for them...'even if they do make an unusual couple'.


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N Thanks to perpetualpathology, NiamhMcGrady-fanpage and guest for your reviews, you're so kind! It helps me to keep writing knowing you enjoy the story, so thank you!**

'Morning' Arthur smiled at his girlfriend who's eyes flickered awake to the buzzing of their alarm and a small but tired smile appeared on her face.

'Morning' she yawned as she sat herself up. 'Oh, _now_ you're resting' Zosia sighed, looking down talking to her bump, and gently stroking it. The baby had kept waking her up in the night by kicking and moving around, and although she'd managed a few hours sleep, she definitely wasn't as energetic as she would have liked ahead of a 12 hour shift where a number of those hours were going to be observing and assisting in theatre. However, there was one part of the day she was rather looking forward to- the 20 week scan.

'Monkey keep you awake again?' Arthur asked, grabbing his trousers and shirt off the floor. Zosia nodded yawning and then Arthur realised he was actually running late.

'Oh god I'm supposed to be at an MDT meeting soon, I promised Mr Levy I'd come in early to help prepare!' he panicked as he quickly threw on some clothes, careful to grab his own and not Zosia's by mistake!

'Oh god, go, go, but you remember about the scan at 11?' She reminded him.

'Yeah sure, right, gotta go' he rushed as he kissed her and ran out of the flat, still putting his shirt on, and she was sure he had his shoes on the wrong feet. She just hoped he was paying enough attention to remember the scan... _I don't know how he could forget, he's as excited as me and I've been pestering him with day by day, hour by hour countdowns for days_ she laughed to herself as she hauled herself out of bed and started to get ready

As the clock drew closer to 11am, Zosia was becoming increasingly agitated and impatient. She kept checking her phone, pager, even asking her colleagues whether they had seen Arthur. Colette had the unfortunate task of informing her that she'd just seen Sacha and Arthur go into theatre. _WHAT?!_

'Colette, it's our 20 week scan in 15 minutes! I can't believe he's forgotten!'

'Oh Zosh, it's ok, I can go and get him?' Colette offered, putting a reassuring hand on the young woman's shoulder.

Zosia shook her head an turned around abruptly to hide the fact that her eyes were welling up with tears and her face was getting red with anger. 'No, don't bother. I'm used to this from dads' she muttered storming off into the locker room.

Even though Zosia wasn't alone, for Colette had taken it upon herself to accompany her to the scan, with every second that passed, Zosia was saddened. She was petrified of history repeating itself, and although she had convinced herself that Arthur wasn't Guy, the fact that he wasn't there waiting with her right now spoke volumes, no matter how much her hormones were wreaking havoc with her emotions.

'I'm sure he's just innocently forgotten Zosh' Colette tried to comfort, but it was no use. _Cuh..._

'I don't care, he promised he'd be here, end of' she snapped. Colette recoiled and then slowly put her hand on hers to comfort her. Zosia looked down and calmed down and then a tear feel down her cheek. Colette noticed this and put her arm over her shoulder, pulling her in.

'Would you like to come in Zosia?' Mr T smiled before realising that she was crying. 'Are you ok?'

He asked, kneeling down in front of her, concerned. Zosia nodded and stood up.

'I'm fine. Shall we just get on with it?' She sniffed, wandering into the office.

'So if you'd like to pop up onto the bed' he smiled as Zosia sat on the bed and swung her legs round. Colette took a seat in the chair next to her, and held her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. She lay back and lifted her scrub top, and Mr T squeezed the cold gel onto her bump.

'Head, spine and heart all look good...kidneys and stomach too, can you see there?' Mr T smiled as he pointed to the screen. Zosia and Colette smiled, and then Mr T turned back to the screen.

'Your placenta is a tiny bit low so we'll monitor that, but I believe we can continue with a normal scan...now, would you like to know the sex?'

Zosia looked at Colette. 'Its up to you, sweetheart' she smiled. Zosia thought for a second and then nodded.

'I would say...and I'm about 80% sure here...that baby March is a boy'

Zosia welled up and smiled. 'A boy?' Mr T nodded and Colette squeezed her hand. 'I'm going to have a son' she wept with joy and Colette hugged her.

'Arthur will be thrilled' she smiled, and Zosia's face fell slightly. _Oh yes, Arthur- I wonder if he's remembered now?_

Zosia went back down to Keller with Colette, and although Zosia was over the moon that her baby was healthy, she was still annoyed with Arthur. 'Are you going to tell Arthur?' Colette asked as they went into the locker room. Zosia shook her head. 'But-'

'No. I'll tell him once he remembers and apologises.' She replied, sternly as she posted her new scan picture up in her locker and smoothed her had over her bump.

'And if you see him on shift?'

'I don't want to see him' she snapped. 'I can get on alternate theatre lists, go in with dad or something.' Colette wasn't convinced but she knew that she needed to support her decision.

'Ok...would you like a lift back to the flat later?' She asked, and Zosia nodded. The rest of the shift passed quickly, and Zosia had managed to spend the day with Guy in theatre. That evening, Colette drove Zosia back to the flat as arranged and as soon as Arthur saw Zosia's thundery face when she arrived home, he suddenly remembered what day it was.

'Oh god, the scan! Zosia, I'm-' Arthur out his hand on her shoulder and she quickly and violently shook him off before turning around.

'Get your hands off of me!' She shouted. Dom stood up and he backed away along with Colette.

'Zosia, I have no excuses, but I am sorry, I'm so so sorry'

'Is this how it's going to be?!' Zosia snapped. Arthur looked blank, so she elaborated. 'Is our son going to have to fight for your attention over your work?'. Tears were welling up in her eyes and she was so upset, she couldn't think straight. 'I thought you were different, I thought you'd care enough to remember!'

'Our what?' Arthur stuttered. He could have sworn she said 'son'.

'If you'd bothered to come to the scan, you would have found out that we're having a boy' she calmed down slightly but the tears started flowing. She sat down on the sofa and gently stroked her bump and then she felt something, and it wasn't a good something. Meanwhile, Arthur was grovelling.

'I'm so, so sorry, I-' Arthur began but then he was distracted by Zosia who let out a gasp, doubled over slightly, and Arthur saw instantly that the young woman looked terrified, and like a child when they lose a parent in a supermarket.

'I think something's wrong...' Her voice barely above a whisper out of fear and emotion, her voice wavering.


	15. Chapter 15

' _Oh my god, please no'_

'Zosh what is it?' Arthur panicked as Dom and Colette hurried over.

'It hurts' she replied, her voice shaking. _'No, no, please, I can't lose him'_

'Don't panic' Colette tried to reassure, 'it might just be stress or to do your low-lying placenta, but just to be sure we'll get you checked out' she tried to be calm for them all but she knew that pain during pregnancy could be a bad sign. Zosia took a deep breath and Dom and Arthur stroked her arms while Arthur kept one hand on the bump as he desperately hoped his little boy was ok. The guys helped her stand but were alarmed by what they saw where she had been sitting...it was obvious that there was a problem, as indicated by the blood stain she left behind. Zosia looked down and immediately burst into tears. She was shaking and the men realised they had to try and keep her calm.

'Ok don't panic, there's a little bit of bleeding but we'll get you to hospital, it'll be fine' Dom tried to be reassuring as he grabbed Zosia's handbag and some keys while Colette hurried to start her car.

 _'I can't lose him'_ Zosia kept thinking to herself. She couldn't speak, she was too worried but the boys and Colette were doing everything they could to reassure her. Unfortunately though, they were hiding deep concern for the unborn child, but for obvious reasons they couldn't express this- their primary concern was getting to hospital and keeping Zosia thinking positively. Arthur and Dom both sat in the back seat with Zosia, Dom and Arthur allowed her to crush their hands or cry onto them, and she took both of them up on this offer.

'Shh it's ok, we don't know what's happening yet' Arthur whispered reassuringly and Zosia cried.

'I'm sorry Arthur, I'm sorry for shouting' she cried as she stroked her bump.

'No, no, do NOT apologise, you have nothing to apologise for, I'm sorry for being useless' he replied as Zosia doubled over again. Thankfully the drive to Holby wasn't long, so as Arthur said this, Colette pulled up in front of reception and Arthur leapt out of the car and miraculously saw Mr T standing in reception talking to a colleague.

'Mr T! Mr T, help, please!' Arthur shouted out as he leapt out his car and got the attention of the obs and gynae consultant. He ran over just has Arthur and Colette were helping Zosia out of the car. _Please let him be ok, I can't bear to lose someone else I love_ Zosia cried and comforted her bump.

'Ok let's get her upstairs' he replied as he grabbed a wheelchair and Zosia sat down. Arthur held her hands and Dom and Colette followed after them, rushing to keep up.

When they arrived up to the ward, Mr T helped Zosia onto a bed and asked for some privacy as he examined her. He did a scan and an internal examination and thankfully found that the bleed was most likely caused by her low lying placenta, and the pain exasperated by the stress of the argument. As he went outside to speak to Arthur, she settled herself into the bed and waited. She as so relieved that the baby was ok, but just thinking about what the other outcome could have been made her shiver.

'She and little one are fine' Mr T smiled as he caught Arthur, Dom and Colette pacing the outside corridor. 'Zosia has had a threatened miscarriage, and before you panic, she is still pregnant and the little fella is ok. A threatened miscarriage is where there are symptoms of a miscarriage but there is no dilation of the cervix or expulsion of the uterus. I've done a scan and the little guy is hanging in there. Now, I'd like to keep her in overnight just to monitor them both, to dot those 'i's and cross those 't's, but I'm confident that they're out of the woods.' Arthur felt relieved but terribly guilty, and Mr T took hint of this. 'Are you ok, Arthur?'

'We had a row and then before we knew it she was bleeding and in pain...she was angry that I missed the scan, understandably' Arthur mumbled, not making eye contact with the consultant. He was ashamed that he could forget and he felt guilty that because of him, they could have lost their baby. Mr T nodded in understanding.

'Stress wouldn't have helped, but don't blame yourself. She has a slightly low lying placenta which can cause bleeding but you got her here in plenty of time, so no harm done. I think Zosia could do with some TLC now, so why don't you go in and see her?'

'Does she want to see me?'

'Yes' Mr T smiled gently. He went back into his office, and Dom and Colette asked him to pass on their love as they waited to take him home. Arthur stood up and walked out onto the ward where Zosia was sitting up in a bed, playing with her sleeves. He noticed that she always did that when she was nervous, so he sat down to face her, and took her hand.

'Our boy is ok' Arthur smiled and so did Zosia, although she didn't make eye contact. 'Did Mr T explain what had happened?' And again, she nodded.

'Arthur...I need to know that today was a one-off...I need to be able to rely on you to put our son first, no matter what. I know you're not my dad, and I wouldn't compare you, but he put work first for a long, long time and although, yes, we're fine now, it damaged our relationship for a long time. I don't want that for you two' she finally said, looking up at him. He stroked her cheek and looked into her eyes.

'I promise, Zosh. Today I was stupid, unreliable and I never want to put you or the baby second. You can count on me' he said gently, and then Zosia moved in and kissed him as his hands snaked around her back and he held her close. As they broke away, they cuddled.

'You're not out of the doghouse yet' she tiredly smiled as she cuddled into Arthur. 'You can expect me to wake you up for cups of tea, bacon sandwiches, pickles and anchovies from now on'

'What if I'm already awake when you go to wake me up?' He teased.

'No, no, I get cravings allllllll night' she clarified, sounding smug and smirking. Arthur laughed gently and kissed her forehead.

'No problem.'


	16. Chapter 16

_AAAAAAAARRGGHHHHH!_

Arthur and Zosia had taken to sharing a bed most nights, and thankfully for Zosia, when her pregnancy nightmares started, it was one of those nights. She dreamt that the baby was stillborn and Arthur was screaming at her that it was her fault. She woke with a jolt, and sat up suddenly, crying her eyes out. Arthur woke up a start, and realised that she was in deep distress. He put both hands on her arms trying to turn her around to calm her down.

'Sweetheart look at me, look at me, look, shhhhh, what's wrong?' He asked assertively but still sounding concerned. She was so shaken and upset that she started to have a panic attack and couldn't breathe properly. _Oh my god oh my god_

'Zosh you need to slow your breathing down for me, ok?' She was crying more than Arthur had ever seen in his life and it broke his heart. 'Shhhh it's ok, I'm here' he whispered as he kissed her on the cheek and held her. He wrapped his arms around her and she rested her head on his chest, while Arthur stroked her bump gently. The baby felt like it was doing somersaults it was moving around so much. 'Little one is restless, just take some deep breathes' he said calmly and soothingly. 'In through your nose, out through your mouth'. Zosia did as he said and then he spoke again. 'What was your dream about?'

'It's stupid' she sniffed.

'Of course it isn't, you're clearly very upset. Please Zosh, tell me'

'I dreamt that the baby died, and you blamed me' she wept. She heard him comfortingly 'shhhh' her as he pulled her into him gently for a cuddle.

'Zosh it was just a nightmare'. He could feel her heart pounding against him. 'Oh sweetheart it's ok' he sympathetically frowned as he kissed her on the forehead.

'I don't want to sleep' she wept.

'Then we won't' he replied. 'Lets watch an episode of something, and then try again ok?'

She nodded. 'Why are you so lovely, Arthur Digby?' She smiled.

'Because you're carrying my child and I love you'

'I love you too' Zosia said quietly, looking up at Arthur who looked into her eyes. They moved together and gently kissed. Arthur grabbed Zosia's laptop and set it up with an episode of Family Guy. After about 20 minutes, Arthur looked down and Zosia was asleep in his arms. He smiled at how peaceful she looked and kissed her gently on the forehead before turning off the laptop and the lamp and going back to sleep.

'You look tired Zoshie' Guy said with a warning but concerned tone the next morning as his daughter arrived on the ward. She wasn't yet in scrubs but she had bags under her eyes, and she was paler than usual, and Guy knew that meant she would have had a bad nights sleep.

'Shut up' she snapped half heartedly.

'Everything ok?' He asked, standing next to her while sorting through some files. Zosia thought for a moment and then turned towards her father.

'Did mama ever have nightmares when she was pregnant with me?' Zosia asked. Guy looked up, thought for a moment and nodded

'Yes, she did- I remember once she said she dreamt that you were born with spina bifida, because she had been worrying about forgetting to take her folic acid' Guy explained, remembering his wife fondly. 'Why do you ask? Have you been having nightmares?'

'I had one last night, it made the baby really fidgety and restless, he must have been terrified- what if it affects him? What if these nightmares make him a worrier, a nervous person?'

'You know, Zosia, it's perfectly normal to have bizarre dreams or nightmares when you're pregnant, it's your hormones way of dealing with your fears. The baby was restless because he was getting all of your adrenaline, but it's normal' he smiled reassuringly and so did Zosia. 'Your mother had a lot of nightmares when she was around 24 weeks too, and you turned out ok.'

'Apart from the bipolar you mean?' She asked, with one eyebrow raised.

'Zosia!' He laughed. 'Your bipolar is nothing to do with mama's pregnancy, surely you know that?' and she poked her tongue out in response. 'Dear dear, you had me going then. I was thinking, for someone with a penchant for psychiatry, that belief would be worrying' he laughed as he put his arm around her. 'Seriously, though, if you need a rest, take one, for gods sake. And _you_ ,' he looked down towards his daughter's bump, 'we've had enough scares and dramas, thank you little man' he instructed to his unborn grandson.

'You're as bad as Arthur for talking to him...Dom keeps saying that it's weird that he talks to my crotch-'

'Ok, point taken' Guy laughed as he recoiled, lifting his hands in surrender.

Arthur joined them on the ward shortly afterwards, and Guy realised that he looked tired as well. 'Did Arthur help you?' He asked his daughter. She nodded.

'Yes, he calmed me and the baby down a lot, he was amazing' she smiled.

'So things are going well with you two?' He asked, one eyebrow raised, leaning over on the nurses station in front of his daughter who was now checking a record on a computer before going to change. Zosia rolled her eyes.

'What is this, girly gossip hour? Dad, we're fine, everything is great. I'm not going to talk to you about my relationship like we're a couple of 14 year old girls'.

'Woah your hormones are on fire today Zoshie' he laughed. 'I just wanted to know that everything is ok, that's all. You may be having a baby but you're still my sweet baby girl, and I want to look out for you'.

Zosia rolled her eyes again, smiled and kissed Guy on the cheek.

'Digby is harmless dad...reminds me of mama in some ways, and that's why I think you'd get on well, if he wasn't so terrified of you' she laughed as she headed into the locker room to change. Guy thought about what Zosia had said, and when Arthur came out onto the ward, he took the opportunity to have a chat with him.

'Dr Digby?' He called out and Arthur immediately froze in his tracks and looked back to find Mr Self looking at him. He gulped.

'Yes Mr Self?' He replied timidly as he approached the CEO. Despite having a lot more to do with Guy now, he always worried when he wanted a 1:1 discussion...the last time that happened, he got his beloved daughter pregnant...

'Arthur, we're practically going to be family in a few months, call me Guy, please' he smiled, putting his hand gently on Arthur's shoulder. Arthur let out a small smile of relief. 'I just wondered if I may have a quick word in my office?'

The two men went into the office and Guy closed the door before gesturing to Arthur to sit down. 'Please, make yourself comfortable' he laughed as Arthur remained standing awkwardly. Arthur smiled politely and sat down, still not really knowing what Guy wanted.

'I wanted to thank you, Arthur, for looking after Zosia- you're really proving yourself in my estimations and you know what they say about dads and their daughters...I've never wanted to let her go and I've never trusted any of her boyfriends, but you've proven me wrong...you're a good guy' He smiled. Arthur nodded.

'Thank you Mr Self, but it's nothing, really- I just want to do the right thing'

Guy nodded. 'I also wanted you to know, that if you ever want some father advice...I know I haven't been the best dad but I have picked up a thing or two...I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'm here for you as much as I'm here for Zosia. Becoming a father is daunting, but as I said, anything you want to know, just ask' he smiled. Arthur finally relaxed and smiled with relief.

'Thank you Mr Se- I mean, Guy' he stuttered. 'I will.'


	17. Chapter 17

'Urgh...eeeeww that's horrible!'

Zosia and Arthur were alerted to their flat mates whinging as they entered the flat following their shift, and found Dom watching One Born Every Minute from behind a pillow.

'What on earth are you watching?' Zosia asked, not bothering to look at the screen as she passed by into the kitchen to get some water.

'Some poor woman's foof being... disfigured, that's what!' He squealed with horror before shuddering. 'I decided to watch it to help you two research what happens when you breed, but...eeuuurghhh! It isn't normally this...eeugghhh..!'

'Dom, you're a DOCTOR. You've seen worse' Arthur pointed out, rolling his eyes at Dom's dramatics.

'Is it possible to unsee things?' He moaned, putting his hands over his eyes and squeezing the off switch on the remote. 'You two are going to have to prepare yourselves, seriously' he advised.

'Not me' Zosia smiled smugly. 'I already know it'll hurt like hell, but I don't need to watch any of the actual birth. If anything, Arthur is going to need to prepare'

'I don't plan on watching anything, I'll be too busy supporting you' he smiled, and Zosia smiled back, and stroked his face affectionately, while Dom rolled his eyes, but then had a cunning idea...

'You're both scared' he grinned, suggestively. 'You're scared you'll freak out'

'No we're not, we're just preparing in other ways' Zosia argued.

'How about we make this interesting? I bet £20 that you can't get through one episode of One Born Every Minute, that I choose, without shuddering, closing your eyes for longer than a blink, or any kind of disgusted or freaked out facial expression' he grinned, holding out his hand to shake .

'Deal' Zosia asserted confidently, shaking his hand. Arthur looked on in disbelief.

'What? No!' He argued

'Oh come on Digby, how bad could it be?'

'Really bad' Dom whispered, raising is eyebrows and making his way over to the TV. 'Both of you, sit. I'll be watching your faces the entire time, remember' Dom smirked as he turned the armchair round to face them while they sat facing the TV on the sofa. Dom switched on the start of the episode he had recorded, and watched their faces like a hawk as it showed 2 women go through labour.

'Dom, this isn't surprising at all, it's exactly what I was expecting...' Arthur argued but noticed that Zosia was very quiet. He looked over and noticed that she was pale, biting her thumbnail and looked nervous. 'Zosia, are you alright?'

 _Oh god that looks painful...what if I can't handle it? What if the pain relief doesn't do enough? Oh fuck what if he gets stuck? What if...ahhhh no! Hell no, I'm not doing that!_ Zosia thought to herself.

'Zosia you look freaked out! I win!' Dom smirked and then Arthur shot him a glare as he squeezed Zosia's hands. 'I told you it was horrific' he gloated unsympathetically.

'Zosh? Are you ok?'

'I can't do that! What the fuck, I can't do what she's doing! I don't want to have a baby anymore' she panicked, her eyes welling up with tears. 'I've spent all this time happy that I'm pregnant and excited about being a mum, without even thinking about the actual act of having a baby- Arthur I'm not going to be able to do it!' She cried.

'Of course you can do it, women have been doing this since the beginning of time, and you're stronger than you think'

'Arthur, I moan and cry when I get period pains, and labour is much worse!' She panicked. It wasn't like this was new information, she knew things would hurt a lot, but the realisation that in just a few short months this was going to happen to her had hit her suddenly.

'All labours are different- don't panic, you'll be amazing. Won't she Dom?' Arthur looked to his flatmate for help desperately, and Dom was starting to feel guilty.

'Yeah, you can do anything Zosh' Dom smiled as he stood up and approached the sofa to sit the other side of her.

'You promise you won't let anything bad happen?' Zosia wept, looking into Arthur's eyes. The poor woman looked terrified and Arthur's heart broke. He squeezed her hand reassuringly.

'Of course not'

'Tell you what, let's say the bet's off, I had an unfair advantage being that I'm not pregnant or hormonal, I don't have a personal stake in this' Dom offered, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder, and the three of them laughed. 'Ok, let's think about something nice...umm...oh, have you two thought of a name yet?'

'We haven't discussed it' Zosia admitted and Dom shook his head.

'Well why don't you start now? I'll make myself scarce, you two think of a name. By the way, 'Dominic' is totally available...' He added, smirking before leaving the room.

Arthur looked at Zosia pleadingly and desperate. 'Please don't tell me you're considering Dominic as a viable option'

Zosia laughed 'no! But he's right, we do need a name' she sighed, stroking her bump. The baby was moving a lot, and Zosia was sure she could feel his feet sticking out every now and then. 'Do you have any ideas?'

'What about Phillip?'

'Mm...don't know' Zosia replied, screwing her face up a little.

'William?...Joseph?...James?...'

'Arthur I don't know...'

'Ok, what do you suggest?'

'I like Jayden...or what about George?'

'...hmmm, that can go in the maybe pile...Horatio!' Arthur blurted, his eyes shining with excitement.

'No!' Zosia blurted, before turning to Arthur. 'Something that will suit him as a baby, child, teenager and adult...'

'Casper?'

'Hmm quite cute, but I don't think so...'

The argument went on for a couple more hours and Zosia was getting fed up. 'Arthur for the last time, we're not calling him Horatio' Zosia sighed.

'Why not?'

'He doesn't like it' Zosia retorted, looking down at her bump.

'Uh-huh, and he told you that, did he?' Arthur replied sarcastically, eyebrows raised and hands on his hips. Zosia shook her head, stroking her bump.

'He doesn't fit the name, I can feel it...and I just don't like the name on a baby, ok?' She snapped.

'What about Charlie? Oscar?'

'They're all nice names, which is progress, but I still don't know'

'Lucas?'

Zosia thought for a moment, and the baby squirmed for the first time since this discussion started. _Lucas Digby...I actually like it...and I think you do too, don't you?_ She placed her hands on her bump and smiled, looking down. 'I think we like it' she smiled and Arthur reached over and felt him moving.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N Apologies for the longer delay than usual in uploading any more chapters, I've been away for a few days to get away from a few things, and haven't had access to a computer to upload anything I've been writing- however, I did get a lot of writing and planning of future chapters done- the story is going to take a little bit of a twist for a few upcoming (and still be completely written) chapters which I hope you'll enjoy…anyway a couple of new chapters are coming your way this evening, so enjoy!**

'I wonder how long it'll be before Marchie can't reach the table anymore?' Dom laughed as he, Zosia and Arthur arrived on Keller. Dom had been a little jealous of Zosia's extra theatre time lately, but Zosia was quick to put him in his place.

'Well Dominic, if you'd like to swap places and pass 3kg through your, ahem, and not work for a year while a screaming infant demands your attention 24/7, let me know and we'll arrange it' she retorted. 'I haven't seen my feet for weeks, they're killing me. Poor Arthur should consider qualifying as a chiropodist, the amount of foot rubs he has to give me after I have a stint in theatre.' She laughed.

'Ok morning guys! Dom and Arthur, can you two begin ward rounds, and Zosia I need you to scrub in for a liver resection' Sacha smiled. 'We need to give you as much experience as possible before you go on maternity leave and while you can still just about reach the table' he laughed as Dom rolled his eyes.

Zosia was 32 weeks and was making the most of her time left as an F2- she was due to begin her CT1 portfolio before going on maternity leave and then taking it up again when she came back. Sacha was confident she would pass the F2 year and was impressed that despite the distraction of pregnancy, she seemed to be seizing the opportunity with both hands.

'So today I'd like you to lead- I'll supervise and talk you through the different stages before you do them' he smiled. Zosia was elated to have such an opportunity.

'So, first make your incision' he began and Zosia performed the various tasks and was about to close up, before she suddenly felt a tightening across her bump. Sacha looked at her as she had stopped. 'Dr March? Are you ok?' He asked, his brow furrowing with concern.

'It just feels a bit tight' she said, before she attempted to continue. However, Sacha came to stand by her, and out his hand on her shoulder.

'Zosia, stop a moment, wait until you're comfortable again' he said as he took the scalpel from her. She placed her hands on her bump and took a deep breath before she felt another tightening.

'Ahhh' she quietly moaned, and Sacha nodded. He had suspected her tightenings were Braxton Hicks.

'Ok Zosia, let's sit you down, don't panic, do you feel any pain?'

'A bit, it's more tightness than anything else though'

'Page Ms Campbell to close up please' he called out to the theatre nurse, 'Zosia come with me, it's ok' he smiled kindly as he helped her to stand up. She looked at him with concern.

'What's happening?' She started to panic.

'It's probably Braxton Hicks but I'll page a midwife, get them to take a look, I'll get Arthur too' he reassured as he pulled his pager out. He sat Zosia down outside theatre and within seconds, Arthur flew round the corner.

'Zosh what's happening?' He asked, sitting next to her and taking her hand.

'It feels strange, like really tight and then relieved again. Sacha thinks it's Braxton Hicks but he's getting a midwife down here just to be sure'. She was worried- what with everything else that had happened during her pregnancy, she wasn't sure how much more she could take without losing her mind to stress.

The midwife arrived and confirmed it was Braxton Hicks, and explained that it was Zosia's body getting ready for labour. Zosia was relieved, but Arthur being the worrier in the relationship, couldn't get it out of his head that something could still be wrong.

'Does that mean it could happen soon?' Arthur asked, worried. The midwife shook her head.

'No, no, most women get these practise contractions from 20 weeks, but only really feel them from around 30 weeks, but go onto go full term. Just keep an eye on them, if they get more severe, more frequent, Zosia has her show or her waters break, then come back in, but I can't see why baby won't go to full term' she smiled.

Zosia decided to stick to paperwork and admin for the rest of her shift, and Sacha, Arthur, Dom and Guy came to check on her occasionally as she sat in the staff room. _'You're causing trouble before you're even here, mister'_ Zosia jokingly scolded her bump, _'but it's ok because mummy's feet hurt and she'd much rather sit here and do paperwork and talk to you'_ She laughed as she then realised that she was talking to Lucas out loud. _'And if you tell anyone I've been talking to you out loud, you'll regret it_ ' she smirked at him.

'First sign of madness Zosh' Dom laughed as he had been leaning in the doorway, watching as Zosia talked away to her baby. She quickly turned out and buried her head in her hands as she realised that her flatmate had seen and heard everything. Dom laughed again and approached her.

'You okay?' He asked, smiling and putting a hand on Zosia's shoulder. 'I'm just coming in here fore a quick break...so Braxton Hicks huh? How are you feeling?'

'I feel weird...like, not physically, but...I'm going to be a mum in two months...I never expected this to happen in the years leading up to this point...it's still so surreal...today has just made it clear in my head that the baby will be coming soon...it's just weird, that's all. I can't wait' Zosia replied as Dom smiled.

'You and Diggers are going to be brilliant parents...and uncle Dom will help, obviously.'

'I can just imagine your face if I go into labour at the flat...you'll be horrified' she laughed.

'Well, yes. But then I'll help, honest!'


	19. Chapter 19

Zosia had rarely been one to know what to do with herself when she wasn't working, so when Guy forced maternity leave upon her when she reached 38 weeks, she didn't react well to the reality of waiting and daytime TV. Her resentment of this period was such that when she couldn't take it anymore, after only 3 days, she arrived on the ward as normal, which concerned Sacha.

'I thought Zosia was on maternity leave?' Sacha asked, entering Guy's office.

Guy looked up, confused. 'She is, I forced her to go a few days ago. Why?'

'Well, she's out on the ward, in scrubs, looking for a patient to treat' Sacha replied erring on caution. He knew that Guy was a protective father and he didn't want to get in the way, but as her mentor he couldn't not say anything.

When Guy arrived on Keller, he saw Zosia sitting behind the nurses station, still trying to find a patient she could treat. 'Good to see you Dr March, but correct me if I'm wrong, but it isn't 15th Seotember 2016 yet?'

'Well done papa, it's good to see we haven't travelled through time' she smirked sarcastically as her eyes scanned the computer screen for a suitable patient.

'Zosia, can I see you in my office please?' He asked calmly, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder.

'Yep...you'll have to help me up though' she replied slightly embarrassed. He smiled at her and held out his hands as Zosia took them and he helped haul her up and she waddled behind him to his office.

'We've discussed this Zosia'

'Discussed what?' She replied, lowering herself onto the ball that Guy was keeping in his office just in case she needed to sit down as he knew she'd never be able to get up from his chair or sofas.

'The fact that you're on maternity leave and therefore not supposed to be coming into work.'

Zosia huffed with frustration. 'I might as well make myself useful'

'Zoshie you haven't been able to reach the operating table for the past few weeks, and your bump has dropped, that means you could go into labour at any moment, have you had your show?' Guy pointed out.

'Eeeew dad!' Zosia grimaced and Guy looked at her. 'Besides, it will be better for me to be here, in the hospital, working, if I do happen to go into labour, because maternity is only upstairs. If I'm at home which is not in the hospital, if I go upstairs I will not find maternity, I will find some very confused neighbours.' So tried to reason, with a hint of sarcasm, but Guy wasnt having it.

'Your body needs to prepare Zoshie'

'I've cleaned the flat more times than I care to think of, and everyone on Jeremy Kyle is a moron- it's so obvious that it's basically a daily spoiler, so what's the point?' she sighed.

'You must be uncomfortable though?' Guy asked and he was right. Lucas's head was right down in her pelvis and she'd been waddling for weeks. Her back was killing her and she couldn't remember the last time she felt her feet. When Zosia didn't respond, Guy spoke again. 'Zoshie?'

'FINE! Fine, I'm going, but don't blame me if I'm back here in a few hours because daytime TV just got too much' she sighed as she waddled off.

'The next time I see you in this hospital, it is going to be when you're in labour, do you understand?' He called after her.

'Perfectly...spoilsport' she argued as she waddled out of his office and down the ward.

'She's her mothers daughter, alright' Guy sighed to himself, remembering fondly just how stubborn Anya was at the end of her pregnancy.

Zosia managed to get home by taxi and have a nap before she was woken by little Lucas shuffling around. 'Oh don't you start' she moaned at him as she sat up and realised that all she had done since she went on maternity leave was sleep, eat, annoy Arthur and Dom out of boredom, ask her dad to give her symptoms to diagnose by text, and sleep some more. She realised that she could be in for a long wait at home while the men were on shift, so she decided to get out a puzzle and reminisce about when she was younger and she would do puzzles with her dad. _I wonder whether you'll like puzzles? Actually, you wouldn't get much of a choice, you'll have to do them with me because I doubt that daddy or uncle Dom will entertain the idea, and when granddad babysits he'll definitely be doing one of two things- giving you puzzles, or teaching you what the full frontal lobe does_ she laughed to herself and smiled as Lucas seemed to respond by kicking.

'Zosia? Why did I hear you were on the ward this morning?' Arthur's voice called out as he entered the flat and found his girlfriend sitting on the floor in front of the coffee table doing the same puzzle she had started hours before. _Uh oh, busted..._

'I was bored' she replied simply. 'But Sacha told my dad, and now here I am, staying out of trouble' she smiled sweetly, like a child trying to get out of trouble. 'Arthur help me find the straight edges?' She pleaded and Arthur smiled, sitting down next to her.

'Sacha has sorted the rota so that if I need to take my paternity leave sooner than we planned, I can, so that was nice of time'

'Yeah Sacha's a good egg' Zosia smiled just as Lucas started kicking her hard. 'Oi, and that's enough from you, little man' she laughed. 'He's kicking really hard, you could probably see his foot if you looked'

A couple of hours later, they had finished the puzzle and surrendered to bed (after Arthur helped Zosia stand up off the floor, that is). As they lay in bed, it was around 1am and Zosia was in a light sleep, dreaming that she was in pain and all of a sudden she woke up and realised that the pain was real. She ran her hand over her bump as it passed. _Oh my god, what if...what if this is it...?_ She thought to herself as she grabbed her phone and unlocked the screen. She opened up an app that Arthur had downloaded for her which timed the intervals and duration of contractions and after timing a few pains, she concluded that she was going into labour. _Fuck, dad is always right..._ she sighed as she shook Arthur who grunted but didn't seem to wake up. Zosia rolled her eyes.

'Arthur!' She snapped to get him to wake up and his eyes opened slowly. 'Arthur, I think we've got a code red'

'Wha?' He grumbled.

'Oh for gods sake..Arthur I think It's started' Arthur's eyes shot open and he sat up, turning the bedside lamp on.

'Whoa, so you're...?'

'I'm pretty sure I'm having contractions...plus my dad said my bump had dropped, so...ahhh' she winced as another pain radiated her abdomen. Arthur's eyes widened with shock and fear as he leapt up out of bed, and started looking around for his phone. 'Don't panic Digby, it'll be hours yet' she tried to calm him down. _Bloody men, I'm the one who is supposed to be panicking, he should be reassuring me!_

'I know, it's just, um, we should get you to hospital, I'll call ahead and let them know we're coming in' he stuttered as he tried to help her stand.

'Arthur, I'm fine here for the moment. We'll probably just get turned away again. Let's wait until I'm further along, or at least until my waters break.' Zosia couldn't believe how calm she felt. She physically felt different, and knew it wasn't a false alarm this time, and although she was nervous, at the moment she was more excited than anything else.

'I'm going to get you some water' Arthur stammered as he went out into the kitchen and living room, and Zosia followed him and sat down on the ball that was similar to the one Guy had recently installed in his office. She bounced on it gently as another contraction faded in and then the front door clicked open and Dom stumbled in, having had a few drinks.

'Heyyy it's a flat party! I'll call some peoples' he cheered, slurring his words but then Arthur stopped him in his tracks.

'Oh no you don't!' He snapped as he snatched Dom's phone from his hands. 'Zosia's in labour' he explained, and Dom's face lit up and he hurried over to where Zosia was currently bouncing, and sat on the floor in front of her. She had one hand underneath her bump, and Dom took the other just as the contraction was wearing off.

'Nothing more sobering than the memory of what happened on One Born and knowing that that'll be you in a few hours' Dom blurted. Although he somehow meant this affectionately, he had little control over what he said when he was drunk, but Zosia glared at him all the same.

A couple of hours passed as Zosia paced around the flat, and her contractions were now around every 10 minutes, and lasted about 30 seconds.

'They're definitely picking up' Arthur noted as he looked at the app on Zosia's phone as another contraction wore off. She was holding his hand and was trying not to make much noise but with that one, she had to let herself groan a little. 'When do you want to go to hospital, Zosh?'

She exhaled as they had shown her in antenatal classes and thought for a moment. 'My waters haven't broken yet, can we wait until then? It's only been 3 hours' she sighed.

After another hour, her contractions were a little quicker, longer and more painful. She was leaning on the floor, and she rested her head on her forearms which were flat on the ground as a stronger contraction took over. She groaned as Arthur rubbed her back, kneeling next to her, and then the game was upped a little...as they heard water splashing onto the carpet, Arthur and Dom looked down to see a puddle forming in between her legs.

'Ok, looks like Lucas is well and truly on his way' Dom smiled as he helped rub Zosia's back supportively. 'Either that, or Zosh just wet herself' he tried to joke, but Arthur and Zosia glared at him which made him be quiet.


	20. Chapter 20

Zosia had been in labour for 13 hours and Arthur was doing his best to support her. She was only 2cm dilated by the time they took her to hospital, but because her waters had broken, they kept her in because of of the risk of infection. He held her hands, gave her ice chips and massaged her back and shoulders. He put his hands on the bed and let Zosia lean on his back during contractions when she finally decided that she preferred being upright as she believed that gravity would help move things along. He had phoned Guy when Zosia got to 7cm as she had told Arthur she wanted him at the hospital when she was far enough along.

'Arthur? How are you?' Guy smiled as he picked up the phone. He was in his office sitting with Colette and Jesse discussing a patient.

'Fine thank you Mr Self, umm...just thought you should know, Zosia's in labour'

'What?! Since when?!' He gasped, as Colette and Jesse looked at him.

'Since 1am, we brought her in at around 5, and now she's 7cm dilated, she's asking for you'

Guy felt a rush of all different emotions- he was excited, ecstatic, but also terrified.

'Ok, I'll be right up' he replied, 'thanks Arthur'. Jesse and Colette looked at him with desperate inquisitiveness, and Guy was pale.

'Zoshie's been in labour for the last, what, 13 hours! She's asking for me, oh my god, I'm going to be a granddad! Colette, Jesse, what do I do?!' He was panicking and started pacing, and Colette stood in front of him, and took hold of his arms while Jesse patted him on the shoulder reassuringly.

'Guy, did Arthur say there was a problem?' Colette asked, taking control.

'No, he just said she was asking for me' he replied. Colette smiled and nodded.

'That's good then- right lets get you upstairs, and just get in there and support your baby girl' she smiled.

When the three arrived upstairs, Dom was asleep in a chair, and they woke him up. 'Dr Copeland, how is she?' Guy asked.

'Screaming, groaning and crying a lot' he yawned, but then saw the look of horror on Guy's face, and realised he had to quickly reassure him. 'But doing really well, I don't think she's had any pain relief, so she's a trooper'

'Oh god, I can't believe it's finally happening, I knew it wouldn't be long but it was still a surprise' he sighed, sitting down next to him. 'Where are they?'

'She's having some quiet time in the birthing pool, something about warm water easing the pain- they said they'd come and get you when Zosia asks, she's adamant she'll definitely want to see you.'

Zosia couldn't stand the pain anymore and opted to get into the birthing pool in the hope that the warm water would give a little light relief from the stronger contractions she was now having every few minutes apart. Wearing nothing but a black halter neck bikini top, the gas and air had started to make her vomit as soon as she started using it hours beforehand and she didn't have any back up pain relief- and she was becoming increasingly emotional.

'I can't do this' she wept as she loosened her vicelike grip from Arthur's hands momentarily.

'Of course you can, you're doing really well-' he smiled, kissing her forehead.

'Arthur, I- aaaaaahhhhhhhh!' She screamed as she gripped onto her partner for dear life and all poor Arthur had to do was let her crush his hands and wrists, whatever she happened to grab hold of first, and try to encourage her. He appreciated that she was a lot more scared than he was but he was still bloody terrified.

'Do you want me to get your dad?' Arthur asked, and Zosia nodded whilst groaning.

Arthur squeezed her hand and then hurried out of the room to find Guy looking stressed, Colette rubbing his arm reassuringly, with Jesse and Dom, biting their nails anxiously as they heard Zosia groan, cry, and most recently, scream.

'How's she doing?' Guy asked, standing abruptly the second he saw Arthur. Colette also stood.

'She's doing amazingly, it seems to be progressing quickly now- Lucas is definitely on his way'

'We'd guessed that, if the screaming is anything to go by' Colette winced as she heard Zosia scream from another contraction.

'Mr Self, she's asking for you' Arthur said, taking some steps back towards the room. Guy shoved his phone into his pocket he hurried into the delivery suite where he found his daughter mid contraction. She looked so scared, so vulnerable.

'Dad! Help me!' Zosia screamed and groaned simultaneously as she held out her hand. She was on her knees, leaning against the edge of the birthing pool where the easing effect of the warm water was unfortunately wearing off as her labour progressed and her contractions got more painful. Guy hurried over and kneeled down next to the pool, taking her outstretched hand, despite knowing what was coming. She groaned as she squeezed her father's and boyfriend's hands as the pressure built and pain grew and peaked higher than ever before. She was shaking but the two men worked together to try and keep Zosia calm.

'Zoshie remember your breathing, you're doing so well' Guy sympathised. 'Do you want some gas and air?' He asked, desperately trying to help, but she shook her head.

'She's been sick from the gas and air' Arthur informed Guy, and Guy nodded.

'I see, ok Zoshie just take deep breaths- don't fight the contractions, it will just make it worse, just breathe them away'

'You can shove your breathing, I need this baby out NOW!' she shouted as she rested her head on the side of the pool. 'Arthur!' She groaned as another contraction took over. Arthur had never left her side and he squeezed her hand to remind her that he was there. 'Arthur I don't want a baby anymore, if you really loved me you would have it, so why aren't you?!'

Arthur looked confused and looked at Guy for help. Guy laughed and reassured Arthur. 'It's ok, Arthur- she must be in the transition stage, her mother was the same.'

'Transition stage?' Arthur asked.

'It means there isn't long to go- she must be nearly fully dilated'

'You're nearly fully dilated' Zosia argued back, to the amusement of Arthur and Guy as another contraction overwhelmed her and she crushed their hands.

'Darling it won't be much longer, I promise' Guy reassured as he kissed his daughter's forehead.

'There's so much pressure down there' she cried- she was exhausted, and close to giving up.

'That's good' Guy nodded supportively. 'It means that little Lucas is in the right place and that your body is doing everything it needs to do so you can meet him soon'

'Aaaaahhhh fuuuuuuuuck!' Zosia wailed as she grabbed their hands again. ' _Oh my god, This really fucking hurts, fuck...oh god he's coming'_ 'I think I need to push!' Zosia panicked as she felt the baby move down quickly and an extreme pressure peak.

 **Some time later...**

'Ok Zosia, go with your urges, and give me a nice big push' the midwife smiled.

'I CANT!' She screamed and cried at the same time.

'You can, Zosia, you can' the midwife smiled as another contraction took over and Zosia focussed all her energy on pushing.

'It hurts!' She cried as she ran out of energy. Arthur and Guy kneeled next to each other either side of Zosia who was now leaning against the edge of the pool while the midwife leaned over on the edges.

'You're doing so well darling' Guy wept with pride. When he thought about it, if someone had told him 2 years ago that this is where he would be now, he never would have believed that he would be here, with his daughter, supporting her as her own baby came into the world. When Anya died, it was no secret that Zosia had never felt more angry and let down by Guy, and he was determined to make things right. The fact that he was there right now meant more to him than the chance to see his grandson being born, to him it meant a new beginning in the relationship he had with his daughter.

'Keep going Zosh!' Arthur smiled encouragingly. Zosia pushed again and again.

'He's coming! Do you want a look, daddy?' The midwife smiled, looking at Arthur.

'It feels like I'm ripping in half!' Zosia screamed and then Arthur decided not to risk looking down there...

'I think I'll pass' he stuttered as Zosia put her chin on her chest and gave a big push.

'The head is out, now I just want you to pant for me. Daddy and granddad maybe you can help here, pant with her'. Zosia was still gripping hold of the two men's hands as she panted with them. 'Lovely! Now one last push, and you'll be a mum!'


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N huge thanks to perpetualpathology, Good cyberman and NiamhMcGrady-fanpage, and guest for the reviews!**

 **Full and complete credit to NiamhMcGrady-fanpage for a brilliant idea for another little twist (used in this chapter), thank you so much for letting me use your idea!**

 **And thank you to the guest reviewer as well! Fair enough to your point! I will make sure I research more thoroughly in future- there is a twist coming up where researching it will need to be critical so I'll be more careful with that- I hope the error I made hasn't detracted from the overall story, and if you have any other feedback on future chapters I invite it**

'Oh hello there little lady' the midwife smiled. _'Wait, what?!'_

'Lady?!' Guy and Arthur gasped in unison, looking up at the midwife in disbelief.

'We have a girl?!' Zosia gasped and the midwife smiled, and passed the baby to Zosia. Zosia was crying, as were Arthur and Guy, but all smiling from ear to ear.

'Arthur, we have a daughter' She wept with joy as she stared down at the crying newborn she was holding against her chest. She wrapped a hand round their new daughter's back and cuddled her close as she had heard that skin to skin contact was good for bonding, as little newborn cries filled the room.

'Good grief' Guy laughed.

'Were you expecting a boy?' The midwife smiled, and they all nodded, although Arthur and Zosia couldn't keep their eyes off their tiny little baby. Arthur put his arm around Zosia and they looked at each other.

'I love you so much Arthur Digby' she wept with happiness, and they kissed.

'I love you more' he smiled before the pair gazed down lovingly at their little girl. Guy laughed with pure joy as he put his arms around the new parents, and then hugged his daughter, kissing her forehead. 'I'm so proud of you Zoshie'

'I love you dad...thank you so much for being here' Zosia cried as the midwives let Arthur cut the cord and then took her to be weighed. Guy put his arms around Zosia and she relaxed into them. This was the most perfect moment.

'6lbs 1oz, such a tiny girl!' The midwife smiled as the three of them all smiled, and then passed her to her parents. She had stopped crying and was now sleeping. She had a little bit of dark hair, chubby cheeks, and from what the three of them could tell, she was the spitting image of Arthur. The midwife helped Arthur dress her in the white babygro they had brought with them, and realised that all the blue things they had bought needed to be replaced with pink! Meanwhile Guy and another midwife helped Zosia out of the pool and into a hospital gown before she sat on the bed.

'I'll take care of everything, you two just take care of your little one' Guy smiled. Zosia smiled at her father and then Arthur passed Zosia their daughter, who was throwing her arms around.

'Do you want a cuddle?' Zosia asked, looking up at him. He smiled and held his arms around and Zosia passed the baby to him while Arthur went outside to tell the others the news.

'She is just like you when you were a newborn, tiny and wriggly' he smiled as tears welled up in his eyes. 'Hello little monkey, aren't you a lovely surprise?' he smiled, remembering what the couple had referred to her as after our 12 week scan. 'So do you think she's going to be a daddy's girl?'

'Definitely' she smiled, looking over at them. She was in shock, all this time she was ecstatic she was having a boy, but even now she had a daughter, she was still overcome with love.

Meanwhile out in the corridor, Jesse, Colette and Dom all stood when Arthur came out of the room.

'Well all our blue stuff needs to be taken back! It's a girl!' Arthur smiled as the others looked thrilled but shocked!

'Oh my god congratulations man!' Jesse smiled, hugging Arthur. 'So she's not going to be a Lucas then' he laughed, as Colette and Dom went to hug Arthur.

'No, but she is perfect, so perfect' Arthur said welling up. 'Come in, come in and see her!'

As Dom, Jesse and Colette entered the room, Guy was just passing the baby back to Zosia, and she smiled from ear to ear as the three of them hugged her and Guy. Zosia was exhausted, she hadn't slept and she was exhausted, but she had a new energy about her- she was a mum, Arthur a dad. The most important person in their lives was sleeping in her arms, and she welled up with happiness, excitement and pride. Dom was perched next to his friend, looking down at his new little flatmate. 'Her hands don't even reach the end of her sleeves' Dom laughed as he reached inside the baby's sleeve to stroke her hand.

'So what's her name going to be?' Colette asked, peering over at her while Zosia passed her to Dom.

'We never discussed girls names' Arthur panicked. 'She was always going to be a boy'

'I promise I won't tell her that on her 18th birthday' Dom joked, and then he looked down. 'It's like looking at a mini Diggers'.

'Isn't she beautiful?' Zosia smiled, welling up.

After a couple of hours, Arthur went home to have a shower and get some things for Zosia and his new daughter, and Dom stayed with them in hospital.

'So...what does labour actually feel like?' Zosia looked at him with one eyebrow raised. 'What? I'll never get to know'

'It feels like your muscles are trying to squeeze a watermelon through a keyhole. It bloody hurts.' She grimaced.

'Was up as bad as you were expecting?'

'Worse. Arthur is never coming near me again. In fact, nobody is.' Zosia laughed adamantly.

'It sounded horrific...I thought you were dying at one point' Dom said sympathetically.

'Yeah, I did try to control my vocals but I couldn't. It's the worst pain imaginable.'

'Worse than being kicked in the, you know?'

'Yes, definitely' she replied, seriously.

'Then how come you get women who say 'oh I want another baby', but you don't get men who say 'oh I want to be kicked in the gonads again'?' He asked, smirking cheekily. Zosia smiled and shook her head.

'Because to feel this feeling again, I would go through labour time and time again- it is so worth it' she smiled down. 'I can't believe we made this...she's finally here' she stared in wonder.

'And it's all thanks to Sacha, if you think about it' Dom winked as Zosia playfully nudged him.


	22. Chapter 22

'Marie?' Zosia suggested.

'Nope! Reminds me of Maria'

'You want to avoid a name because it reminds you of your ex?'

'Ok, what about calling her Jessie?' He retorted.

'No, no, Jesse and I are on good terms now but that's still too weird' Zosia frowned. 'Point taken' Zosia sighed, looking down at their still nameless daughter whilst Arthur changed her. They had brought her home just hours before, and while Guy, Colette and Jesse were out shopping for the pair, trying to exchange the new family's blue baby things for pink, Dom stayed at home to help the new parents settle their daughter in. She had already managed to talk him out of a few horrendous names but just like when they thought they were having a boy, it was a struggle to find a name they both liked. 'What about Ava?'

'Hmmm' Arthur responded, twisting his face up a bit as he shook his head. 'Jasmine? Belle?'

'No, I'm just not feeling them, sorry. God why is this so hard?' She moaned, and Arthur looked at the baby and thought hard.

'Minnie?'

'Were you obsessed with Disney as a child by any chance?' Zosia laughed. 'What about Matilda?' She suggested, as she stood to go and get them both a glass of water. Arthur went to object but then stopped, and looked down.

'That...actually suits her' Arthur replied, his eyes widening. 'Yeah I like it' Arthur smiled as Dom entered.

'So, have you two finally decided?' He asked out of curiosity as he slumped down into the sofa next to Arthur.

'Arthur? Have we?' Zosia asked, looking over to the pair.

Arthur peered down at their little girl and smiled, nodding. 'Matilda' he smiled as he passed her to Dom to hold.

'That's cute' Dom smiled, watching Matilda sleeping. 'I still think she's the spit of you, Diggers...but with Zosh's eyes...I think' he smiled. Then Matilda started to cry, and he panicked. 'What do you think she wants?' Dom panicked. 'Tilly I don't understand what you want' He freaked out as Zosia laughed.

'Tilly?' Zosia smiled, looking at Dom.

'Yeah...short for Matilda...I thought it was quite cute...anyway, Zosh are you going to do something about this?! Crying babies and Dom don't mix!' He freaked out, his voice getting higher in pitch and quicker, as he held out the crying little person in front of him.

'She probably wants feeding' she laughed as she sat down, relieving Dom of his baby holding duty. As she got ready to feed her, Dom quickly turned away and grimaced.

'And now that's my queue to leave' he pointed in the direction of his bedroom and he got up and left, leaving Zosia and Arthur laughing and shaking their heads.

'Anyone would think he was afraid of babies' Arthur shook his head and Zosia laughed. 'I rather like Tilly as a nickname, don't you?'

Zosia nodded, and went back to focusing on Matilda. She couldn't believe how perfect she was. Of course, time would tell of what kind of baby she would be, and she was hoping she would be a good sleeper, especially for their work patterns. Either way, motherhood excited her. She kept thinking of the journey they all had ahead of them, and at that moment, her thoughts were interrupted by the front door opening.

'Hey it's only us! Guys, you are going to LOVE the things we picked out!' Jesse called out enthusiastically, carrying several large carrier bags. Colette and Guy followed shortly after.

'We had to practically drag him out of the shops, he was getting way too into baby shopping.' Colette retorted, rolling her eyes before sitting down next to Zosia who was now trying to get Matilda to burp by gently patting her and rubbing on the back.

'Are you getting broody uncle Jesse?' Zosia winked, laughing.

'No way!' He replied, looking embarrassed.

Zosia laughed, and then turned her attention back to Matilda. 'Dad, what should I do if she doesn't burp?'

'She might not need to, you could try another position but she looks like she's quite content with just having a little sleep at the moment, aren't you darling' he smiled, reaching for her tiny hands. 'Have you chosen a name yet?' Guy asked, and Zosia smiled.

'This is Matilda' and with that, Zosia passed her to him. Guy was loving being a grandparent, and as he, Jesse and Colette got out all the things they had managed to get in exchange for the blue baby things Zosia and Arthur had bought previously, it was obvious that they were finally a tight family unit again. Everything was going to be ok. And Zosia, for one, couldn't wait for their new adventure.


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N Thank you to NiamhMcGrady-fanpage and Gillian Kearney Fan for the reviews!**

 **Also massive thank you to NiamhMcGrady-fanpage for the colic idea in this chapter! It feeds in really nicely with what I had already written so I've included it here, so thank you and full credit to you! I may be a bit quiet the next few days as I'm trying to write ahead, but depending on whether I get chapter 24 ready tonight, you'll have that too.**

'Oh Tilly baby, please go to sleep' Zosia cried as her little girl cried in her arms. She had been crying for over three hours and she had tried everything to get her to stop. Sadly, the new parents hadn't slept well in the past few weeks since they brought Matilda home, and she persistently cried. They were awe-consumed with love for her and loved being parents but they were experiencing new levels of tiredness that they never knew even existed. Arthur had gone back to work and was on a late shift, and fortunately for him, that meant he missed Matilda's prime crying time, as she was worse in late afternoons and evenings.

'Is she broken?' Dom sighed and yawned, rolling his eyes, and this only upset Zosia more.

'I'm doing my best Dom! Why don't you try if you think you know everything?!' She snapped, and Dom recoiled.

'Whoa, ok, I'm sorry- I know you're doing your best. Why don't you let me try?' He offered, holding his arms out. Zosia reluctantly passed Matilda to him but it seemed that passing her to uncle Dom was a bad move, as it made her scream even more. 'She wants her mum' he quickly blurted, passing her back quickly.

'I think she has colic, she keeps clenching her fists, arching her back and curling her feet.' She exasperatedly sighed as she gently bounced Matilda, and shushing her comfortingly.

'Have you been winding her after feeds?' Dom asked, and Zosia nodded.

'Yes, I read that it can help with a colicky baby...oh little girl, I don't know what you want' she moaned as Matilda continued to cry loudly. Zosia was exhausted, and knowing that Arthur was at work made her more stressed. She took Matilda out in the car, gave her a dummy, and eventually when she finally fell asleep over an hour later, Zosia was elated. Arthur arrived home from a long shift exhausted and Zosia practically pounced on him when he came through the door. 'Arthur! She's asleep!'

'Huh? Oh yeah, great, well done' he replied, kissing her, and then yawning with a tired smile before he slumped back onto the sofa. Zosia knew she should take this opportunity to sleep herself but her mind was buzzing. Instead, she just sat next to Arthur who was gazing lovingly into the Moses basket at his daughter, and began to give him a blow by blow account of the ordeal, without taking a breath.

'Well the first thing I tried was just cuddling her, but that wasn't enough, so then I tried feeding her, but then she was sick, and then winding her which made her sick again, so I gave her a dummy which she spat out and then I laid her across my chest and she seemed to like that for a little while, but she likes being in the car so I think what we should do next time is-'

'Zosia, slow down!' Arthur laughed, both of them being careful and quiet so as not to wake her again.

'But I'm just trying to explain to you what you should do if she cries again, because she will' she warned. 'I got her to stop and sleep' she smiled before she yawned.

'Go to sleep Zosia, really' Arthur smiled.

'Hey Diggers, what do you think of- oh crap, sorry!' Dom blurted louder than the two of them would have liked as Matilda stirred and started to cry again. Zosia and Arthur both glared at him as Arthur picked her up out of the Moses basket and walked around with her.

'Nice one, Dom, she was finally asleep' he snapped as Zosia went to get a small amount of expressed milk.

'Let me try and feed her, and then we can give her this' she sighed, passing the small bottle to Arthur as sat and she tried to feed the little girl. 'I added some lactase drops to the expressed milk to see if that settles her if it's her tummy' She added as Arthur stroked her hand, and Tilly grasped hold of his finger.

After an hour of Arthur and Zosia taking it in turns walking around with her as she cried her heart out, Matilda started to feed and as Zosia winded her, she started to settle. 'I think it's colic, Arthur, what if it's something I've done to her?! What if she's allergic to breast milk, what if I'm not holding her right, oh god' Zosia panicked. She looked so upset, and Arthur reassured her the way he could.

'Nobody knows what causes colic, but it affects 1 in 5 babies, we just have to keep trying different things. You said she liked being in the car? It's probably vibrations she likes, and we can try a warm bath maybe, we'll figure it out. You're doing a great job' he tried to be reassuring, but the truth was he just didn't realise the extent of what was happening in his partner's head. He'd been there for her through her previous bipolar episodes, and her behaviour struck him as a little odd but he thought she was just adjusting to parenthood.

However, it only took a couple of days for him to realise just how much Zosia was struggling, and just how much she needed help. More help than he alone was able to give...


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N I'm nervous about posting this chapter as it departs from the tone of the story quite dramatically but I felt like it was something that would be a challenge to write about, so I just went for it…I've tried to research as much as I can but I'm bound to make mistakes, so if you do know more about this and I have made a mistake, feel free to tell me but bear in mind that I'm no expert, and I hope it doesn't detract from your enjoyment of the chapter. The thoughts here may be confusing but that's the point. Thank you in advance!**

'Let me take her, Zosh, you go back to bed, you must be exhausted' Arthur offered, moving to sit next to her. 'Come on Tils, let's have a cuddle with daddy' he smiled as he reached over to take her out of Zosia's arms but she abruptly stood up and moved away. _He's going to take her away from you, he thinks you're a terrible mother, Tilly has been crying for a long time, a good mother would have gotten her to stop by now, but it's ok Zosia, if you don't let her out of your sight they can't take her away..._

'Zosh? It's ok, I can take her' he smiled again. _He knows there's something wrong with Tilly and thinks you can't look after her...but there is no way he's going to have Tilly sent away, he's not on your side..._

'No, it's fine, I've got her' she abruptly said very quickly, and Arthur noticed that she was expressionless. Her eyes were vacant, and she didn't just look tired. At this point, Dom appeared wearing his green kimono and looking tired but sympathetic.

'Would you like me to try?' He asked, holding out his arms, but then Arthur shot him a worried look. Zosia caught onto this and snapped.

'You both think I'm a bad mother, don't you?! I see the way you both look at me when I hold her, you want to take her away from me! Well I won't let you' she snarled as Arthur and Dom were taken aback with shock.

'Zosh?' Arthur said gently and quietly, trying to approach her. She looked terrified, angry and psychotic. _He wants Matilda for himself...he wants you to give her up, you're shit at this._

'Shut up, I won't let you take her away from me!' She screamed. Matilda by now was crying uncontrollably and Zosia did the only thing her impulses were telling her to do- run. She held Matilda close to her, and made a beeline for the door. Arthur ran after her and called to her, but as her car sped off, he ran back inside.

Arthur and Dom looked at each other in horror as they had a terrible feeling that Zosia's bipolar was spiralling out of control. Arthur knew he had to call someone for help, and knew that Guy was the best bet. Guy was at home, getting ready to come to the flat to see Zosia and the baby, and when he saw Arthur calling, he didn't expect what he had to say.

'Mr Self? Please help, we have a problem with Zosia, she's taken Matilda, I don't know what to do'

'Where is she?!'

'We don't know, she just ran out the door with her. She's taken her car'

'What's happened?'

'She hasn't been herself for days but now it's out of control, she's possessive, elated and happy to the extreme one minute, down and depressed the next, and she's really paranoid, she thinks we're trying to take Tilly away from her. Do you think it's postnatal depression?'

'Unfortunately I think it's worse than that' Guy sighed sadly. 'I know a few places where she could have gone, keep your mobiles on, keep each other updated yeah?' He asked as he headed back out the door and down to his car.

'Nobody is ever going to take you away from me, my little princess' Zosia whispered as she cradled Matilda. She was sitting on a bench, next to her mother's grave. 'Mama will keep us safe, daddy and uncle Dom don't trust mummy, but your grandmama and papa will help us...'

She smiled as her daughter squirmed to get comfortable. Guy had a feeling she would come to Anya's grave, and knew that when he approached her, he needed to take care. She was a natural with her, he thought to himself, looking on at them. She was such a good mother, and it broke his heart to know that her mental health was deteriorating again. 'Zoshie?' He approached her and she turned around and smiled.

'Daddy' she smiled. He felt deflated but was relieved to see that both of them were safe. 'Tilly was just wondering when she could have her cuddle' she smiled as she passed Matilda to him. He sat down next to her and kissed her on the forehead.

'Zoshie, i've been worried about you- Arthur said you took Matilda out in a hurry...what's going on?'

'He wants to take her away from me...and Dominic' she replied reluctantly, playing with her sleeves.

'Zosia, they love you and want to help you' he smiled, sadly. 'They are worried about you...when you disappeared with her, they thought-' Guy continued but then he saw his daughter well up and shake her head.

'I would never hurt her' she cried as she stroked Matilda's head gently while Guy was holding her. 'But I'm scared...my thoughts are telling me I'm a shit mum and that Arthur and Dom are trying to take her away from me, it's confusing' she cried as she looked down at her. 'She cries all the time, she doesn't sleep, I hear them, they think I'm fucking shit at all of this. I see how they look at me when I hold her! Mama told me to run away, she always knows what to do and what to say, so I brought her here because mama will protect her...'

'Zoshie...mama is dead...we've been through this'

'But she talks to me dad. She's the only voice I hear that tells me what to do, the others are determined to see Tilly taken away from me and I can't let that happen' she replied manically, her voice getting quicker and louder.

Guy's heart broke as he saw his daughter broken before him, and he looked down at the sleeping baby girl in his arms. 'You're a wonderful mother Zoshie, we all think so, but you're having these thoughts because you're not very well...we need to get you a little bit of help...'

'I'm fine, I just need to go to mama and she'll make everything better. She'll make it all stop, she always knows how'

'Zoshie you both need to come with me now' he replied with caution in his voice, like he wasn't sure of what her reaction would be. She was sounding paranoid, and right now, although he needed her to come with him and get help, he needed her to trust him.

Zosia went quiet. _What were you thinking, he's not on your side! You stupid bitch, you trusted him, and now you've given him your child! At least now he's got your baby, and you'll never see her again. You'll never damage her now._

Guy noticed a look of distress in Zosia's face as tears welled up in her eyes and a look of terror came over her. 'Zoshie?'

'You're one of them' she blurted, looking disgusted, and she tried to lunge towards him to take Matilda but he stepped backwards and Zosia all of sudden collapsed to the ground in tears. Guy quickly laid Matilda in her pram and then knelt down to his daughter who was now a crying heap on the floor. He held onto her tightly while she cried hysterically, and he cried too. He hated seeing her like this, and knew that he needed to get her help. As he held his daughter, he got his phone out and called Arthur.

'Arthur? Yes I've found them...physically they're fine, but I'm going to call ahead to the psych unit...I think we have a problem...'

 **A/N I'm sorry for anyone who doesn't like this chapter! I promise it gets more upbeat again soon, I just wanted to try something a little different!**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N Many thanks to NiamhMcGrady-fanpage and Amelia for your reviews and encouragement! I'm sorry it's taken me so long to get these next two chapters up, it's taken a while for me to write them!**

'She's been hearing voices, including her late mother, possibly hallucinating, and according to her boyfriend and Matilda's father, Arthur, she's been fluctuating between depression and mania, has been extremely paranoid and possessive, and struggling to cope with the demands of parenthood. Tilly rarely sleeps and her hormones are all over the place' Guy explained. 'We knew this was a possibility with Zosia having bipolar, we had a care plan, but we were desperately hoping that she would be ok...she came off her medication for the last couple of weeks of her pregnancy and she seemed to be doing ok until now'

'We can offer Zosia a place in our mother and baby unit for the treatment of postnatal psychosis' the doctor explained. 'We don't want to interfere with the bonding process between Zosia and Matilda, so they will stay together, monitored of course, and we can help with Matilda's basic care whilst also looking after Zosia's mental health and working through undertaking treatment plans with her. How has she been on her medication?'

'She's been fine up until the last week or so where her symptoms have been recurring again...she even stopped taking them for the last couple of weeks of her pregnancy... Will she be allowed visitors?'

'We have two sets of visiting hours a day, but our usual policy is close family only.'

'But I'm sure she would appreciate being able to see family friends' he replied, considering Jesse, Colette and Dom. The doctor shook her head sadly.

'I'm afraid we do have to limit visitors to strictly family only, at least for the moment.' She explained, and Guy nodded sadly in response.

Arthur was sitting outside while Guy spoke to the doctor and a psychiatrist helped settle Zosia in. How can this be happening? She got through the whole pregnancy without any issues with her bipolar and she was still taking her medication. His thoughts were interrupted by Guy sitting next to him.

'Arthur? Arthur I need to talk to you'

'What's happening?' He asked. Matilda was crying a little and Arthur was trying to comfort her by rocking her gently. Guy looked at him sadly.

'Zosia needs to stay in the psych mother and baby unit...Tilly will be staying with her so they can help look after her, so they can still bond. Now, they have two visiting sessions a day where you can see them both...'

'I can't believe this is happening' Arthur was terrified. He knew that Zosia would be terrified- when she was sectioned before, she had told him she was scared, lonely and couldn't trust herself to do anything, and with the baby he was worried that she would struggle with her in the unit. He felt helpless, all he wanted to do was support Zosia and be with her and their daughter. Guy put his hand on his shoulder comfortingly.

'She's in the best possible place- all of us are here for you, and I will visit whenever I can so I will do everything I can to help both of you through this, and help with Matilda. She's dealt with this before, and she can do it again. The doctors here have a lot of techniques they can use and treatments to suggest, and we'll all work together to find one that works and we won't rest until we do, and it isn't like the psychiatric unit she was in before, she'll have a lot more freedom and it's a child friendly environment' Guy reassured him.

'I just want Zosia to be ok...I love her so much' he sighed, trying not to cry in front of Guy. 'Can I see her now?'

Guy shook his head reluctantly. 'She was, quite frankly, psychotic when I brought her in...she's currently being settled in herself, and she may need medication before any of us can see her. Let's get this little flower settled in and we'll stay until we know what's going on' Guy suggested.

'She probably wants feeding' he added as Matilda started to cry. Arthur pulled out a bottle and started to feed her. 'You need to be a good girl for mummy, ok princess?' He spoke gently. 'I'll see you very soon' he sniffed as he kissed her on the head gently, as a nurse appeared to take Matilda through to Zosia.

'Lets go and get Zosia a bag packed with some of their things' Guy suggested, knowing that it was likely that Zosia was being assessed and wouldn't be able to see anyone at least until they got back...


	26. Chapter 26

Arthur visited his two girls at every opportunity, and Zosia continued to have Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and other therapies. During a meeting with a psychiatrist, 6 weeks later, she was asked again about her feelings and the voices she had been hearing.

'All the voices...they're confusing...they don't give a consistent message, some are nice and others are horrible. When I got here I didn't know what was real and what wasn't anymore.' She admitted to her psychiatrist. 'I felt like I couldn't do anything, and then the voices started telling me I can't give her a good life, and that I was going to damage her if she stays with me, but I also knew that I love her, even though it felt wrong that I could love her but still be damaging her...' Zosia started to cry.

'What about Arthur? Does he help out a lot?'

'Yes' she nodded, 'he's amazing with her' she smiled slightly, looking down at her now 2month old Matilda who was sleeping in her arms. 'Will I ever be cured?'

'I can't answer that, Zosia' he replied, sadly. 'But, you're responding really well to the therapy and new medication...living with mental health problems, it's best to take things one day at a time, you know that.'

Zosia nodded in response. 'So, I can go home?'

'Yes, I think you're well enough, so I'll sign you off for, say, end of the week' he smiled. 'That's the beauty of places like this, it isn't like a psych unit...you've come so far'

'This has been a life saver so far...I feel awful that I've put Arthur and my family through this.' Matilda was sleeping in her arms and she was becoming a much more content baby in the 6 weeks she was spending in the unit, 'but I feel ready to face the world again...'

Their routine consisted of Zosia caring for Matilda, followed by a chat with a psychiatrist, then group therapy where they discussed anxiety coping techniques and parenting techniques, and then an activity like baby massage or baking. She was feeling stronger by the day, and while the voices hadn't disappeared, they were quietening and she felt that she could cope with everything. Arthur visited every day, and so did Guy, although they had to miss their morning visit one day. When they arrived in the evening, Zosia was lying on her front on the floor while Matilda attempted to bat the teddy she was dangling in front of her with a closed fist, and she wriggled her arms and legs. She had also developed a strong grip, which Zosia loved when she grabbed her finger, but didn't love so much when she wouldn't let go of her hair!

'Clever girl!' Zosia cooed as she then caught Arthur smiling at them through the window, and she leapt up and ran to the door as Arthur opened it.

'How are you beautiful?' Arthur smiled as Zosia ran to greet him. She wrapped her arms around him and he held her tightly, kissing her. She was excited to tell him and her father that she was ready to leave the unit.

'I feel good...Tilly's missed you today, you should see the faces she's been pulling, she definitely gets her serious face from you' she laughed as she showed him some photos she had taken.

'Oh god you'll be teaching her how to gurn next' Arthur laughed, swiping through the camera, while Guy danced around with Matilda who was looking around, taking everything in, and looking around for where the talking in the room was coming from. 'She's calmed down a lot, hasn't she?' He smiled as he stood to take Matilda from Guy.

'Have they said when you can come home?'

'They've said I can leave at the end of the week!' She squealed as their faces dropped with surprise and happiness. 'The CBT is helping, and my new medication is great..did you hear that darling, we're going home' she smiled as she took hold of Matilda's hand and then started making funny noises at her as Arthur rocked her gently, and then they saw something magical...her first ever smile.

'Did she...did she just-?' Arthur stuttered

'That is the most beautiful smile I have ever seen' Guy smiled and Matilda beamed.

'She's never properly smiled before' Zosia welled up, and Guy hugged her. 'I've been trying to get her to smile for the past couple of weeks but this is the first proper smile she's done...she's sleeping much better too...she sleeps a little longer and is awake during the day a lot more.'

'How do you feel about coming home?' Arthur asked, and Zosia smiled, taking Matilda.

'I feel ready...this place has saved me...I'm not cured, but I'm ready to leave and be the best mum I can be to this little smiler' she cooed as Matilda was still beaming her gorgeous, toothless grin.

'I'm so proud of you Zosia...we all are' Arthur smiled.


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N Thank you NiamhMcGrady-Fanpage for yet another lovely review, you're too kind! I really appreciate the feedback, so thank you! This chapter has some Zosia/Colette as requested**

'I think that's the longest she's let us sleep in' Zosia yawned as she woke up to whimpering coming from the cot on the other side of the room. She smiled as she picked Matilda up and sat back down on the bed next to Arthur who had reached over to put his glasses on. Zosia leaned back and raised her knees, lying Matilda down on her legs so she was facing them. '7 hours! Thank you baby girl' she cooed as she kissed Matilda's hand that was currently grasping her finger. 'She's got a really tight grip on her!' She laughed, and Arthur smiled at the pair of them, and Zosia turned to him.

'Thank you for everything Arthur...' She smiled as Matilda continued to whimper. 'I couldn't have gotten through the past year if it wasn't for you' she continued honestly as Arthur smiled and put his arm around her. They looked lovingly at their daughter who was pouting a little, and Zosia knew what this meant. 'Are you hungry missy?' She turned her attention to their crying daughter. 'I've noticed she pouts a little for a second or two when she's hungry' she smiled to Arthur who gazed lovingly at the two of them. He had only just got his girls back a few days before, and he was dreading having to go back to work. He wanted to be with them all the time, and although he was confident that Zosia would be alright, he missed them.

'Colette said she would pop round later when she's finished her shift if you were up for visitors' Arthur sighed, 'although I really want to stay here'

'We'll be fine, I'll text Colette in a bit, it'll be good to see her' Zosia replied as she lifted Matilda away to wind her as she had just unlatched. She placed a cream muslin cloth over her shoulder and gently patted Matilda on the back and within seconds, she was sick and started to cry.

'Ohhhh I know, it's not nice being sick is it darling?' She cooed as she tried to sooth the crying baby, and then wiped her face down with the cloth. Matilda settled rather quickly and Arthur took her for a cuddle. As he walked her out of their bedroom, Dom stumbled out of his own room, yawning.

'My human alarm clock is a bit late going off this morning!' He laughed as he knelt down slightly to be Matilda's level and let her grab his finger. 'Thank you for the lie-in, little pretty' he laughed, and she smiled as he blew a raspberry on her hand and then he turned to Arthur. 'It's been weird without them here, hasn't it?'

'I would have thought you rather enjoyed being able to live in a baby-less flat for a few weeks, the being able to talk at normal volume, have music on, have sex with anyone you bring to the flat..'

'Well I think Tilly would appreciate the stories I have to tell and the music I listen to. And can I bring men home if it's just to cuddle?' He winked sarcastically. Arthur rolled his eyes.

Dom dragged a reluctant Arthur to work while Zosia tidied the flat ready for Colette's visit. Matilda was entertained by her play mat, batting the dangling toys and trying to grab hold of them, and when Colette knocked on the door, Matilda stopped and looked around for where the noise was coming from. Zosia went to open the door, and when she did, Colette practically went flying as she threw her arms around Zosia.

'It's so good to see you chick' she smiled as Zosia hugged her back. 'I'm so relieved you're ok'

'Me too' she smiled back, and then they were disturbed by whimpering.

Zosia invited Colette in and they made their way into the living room where Matilda was wanting some attention. Zosia picked her up and she stopped crying instantly, and Colette looked at the pair in wonder.

'Hasn't she grown?!' she gasped as Zosia smiled at Matilda who was focussing on Colette.

'She's doing really well, she can support her head for a little while when on her tummy, and she doesn't cry as much as she used to...gave us all a nice lie in today too, didn't you Tilly?' She smiled. 'Would you like a cuddle?'

Colette smiled and nodded, 'I'd love one!', as she sat on the sofa and got comfortable.

'Let's have a cuddle with Auntie Col' Zosia kissed Tilly's head as he laid her down in Colette's arms, and they gazed at her.

'I talk to her a lot, I learnt that talking to babies a lot can help their development, preparing them for when they learn their first word...she recognises my voice, it's amazing, she looks around when I'm talking but Arthur holding her to see where I am' Zosia grinned.

'There's no denying she's yours and Arthur's, she's the exact replica of the pair of you, utterly gorgeous...definitely got your eyes. Zosh, your mum would be so proud of you'

'I think of mama a lot...she'll always be here while I have her...it's strange but I feel like she's just over my shoulder when I hold her...not physically I mean, but spiritually...is that strange?'

Colette smiled at her and passed Matilda back to her and she watched as Zosia babbled to her and watched how happy Tilly looked- she reached up to Zosia's face, and smiled away. Colette felt warm and happy that Zosia had found so much happiness with her new little family. She had come a long way since Anya had died and being a mother suited her.

'No, that's not strange. It's ok to believe you feel her presence if it brings comfort to you' she smiled as she brushed a section of Zosia's hair away from her face and softly stroked her cheek.

'I just worry that it's just my bipolar, or psychosis, that if I tell anyone I sense she's here, that they'll just tell me I'm ill'

'Zosia, you've come so far from how you were before...the difference between how you are talking about her now, compared to how you talked about her before when you were convinced that patient had your mother's spirit in her, to when she talked to you, they are so different. When my granddad died, I felt the same as you, like he was watching over me and still here in spirit, there's nothing wrong with that.'

'Thank you Colette' Zosia welled up and Colette put her arm around her and hugged her. 'Now you' she smiled, turning to Matilda, 'shall we show Colette what you can do on your tummy?' She squealed as she lay Matilda down, and they watched her lift her head.

'Such a clever flower!' Colette gasped as both she and Zosia laid on the floor with her.


	28. Chapter 28

Zosia had just finished changing a four month old Matilda when her mobile started ringing- it was Sacha. 'Sacha! How are you?'

'Very well thank you Zosia, how are you and Matilda?'

'We're great, thanks! To what do I owe the pleasure?' She asked as she supported her phone to her ear on her shoulder as she picked up Matilda who was nibbling on her fist.

'Well, it's Arthur- he's just suffered a panic attack, is there any way you can come in? He wants to see you both...I've never seen him so shaken up by a death before'

 _What the? That's not like him...I wonder what's happened..._ 'Yes of course, I'll be right there...what happened Sacha?'

'Great, that's great, thank you- we just lost a patient...it transpires that he was Arthur's best friend from school...he's shaken and I just want to help him' Sacha admitted, and Zosia welled up. _Oh my darling...he must be devastated._

'We'll be right there'

When they arrived at the hospital, they were greeted by Dom and Sacha, who offered to take Matilda for a little while Zosia headed into Keller's locker room where Arthur was sitting with his head between his knees. She hurried over to him and sat down, putting one arm over his shoulder nod stroking his arm with the other. He looked shaken, scared and upset. 'Arthur? What's wrong? What happened?!'

He looked up and there she was, his beloved Zosia. He had not seen his best friend from school for years, not since Arthur went to university. They had lost touch when his friend isolated himself and Arthur had heard that he'd moved away, turned to drugs, alcohol, the lot.

'We lost him, Zosh' he replied. He was freaked out. 'It could so easily have been me, we were inseparable as teenagers, it was only when we went our separate ways that he went down the wrong path...I tried to keep in touch, but he just disappeared...I thought he had moved away, and seeing him today just reminded me of everything that we went through together...I tried to make the right call...Sacha says that both options were valid but I should have gone with the other option...I should have saved him!' he wept, shaking. Zosia could feel her heart breaking into a million pieces as she held him. 'I let him down, all those years ago...I should have been there...'

'Arthur, listen to me. You are not responsible for someone going down the wrong path. You did your best for him then, just that I have no doubt in my mind that you did your best for him today' she tried to reassure him.

'I'm sorry' he cried. 'It was just a shock'

She nodded with understanding. 'I know' she smiled weakly as she held his hand, and kissed him on the cheek. As she held him, and reassured him just as he had done with her many times, they were interrupted by a knock on the door. Zosia answered it to reveal Guy.

'Darling is everything ok? I heard you were here...'

'We're fine, Arthur has just had a shock and some sad news, I'm just sitting with him for a bit...'

'Where's Matilda?' He asked out of curiosity. 'We'll take her for the afternoon if you like? We're just doing paperwork anyway, and I'd rather look after my granddaughter' Guy smiled, and Zosia nodded.

'Thanks dad, she's with Dom at the moment, he offered to take her during his break because he could see how upset Arthur was...I'll tell him you'll come for her soon- thank you' she smiled weakly, hugging her father.

'So Matilda, you can recognise objects because of your parietal lobe is developing, and you also have a temporal lobe which lets you hear things, see?' Guy smiled as he held Matilda in one arm, and showed her a picture of a brain with the other. She was staring at it and Guy liked to think that she was taking everything that he was saying in, but Colette thought otherwise.

'Guy, she doesn't understand you. Stick to baby talk, babbling, or if you must teach her something, make it animal noises' she laughed.

'I did this with Zoshie when she was Tilly's age, and look at her now, she's a doctor.'

'Let's give her some tummy time, Zosia said she enjoys that, give her brain a rest' she laughed

Zosia and Arthur went up to Guys office to find him and Colette lying on the rug playing with Matilda. Guy put a plastic pyramid ring on top of her head which confused her but then when it fell on the floor she was squealing away, so Guy kept doing it. They looked up when they saw them standing there, taking a photo. 'Now that's one for twitter' Zosia laughed before Colette passed Matilda to her, or at least tried to because she grabbed Colette's hair and smiled as Colette said 'ouch' in a playful way.

'Oh and by the way, she's learnt how much she enjoys grabbing hair- have fun!' Colette smirked sarcastically before laughing and kissing Matilda on the cheek.

'Yes and we rescued her from Dr Copeland and Mr Levy after they snap chatted me this video' Guy frowned, reaching for his phone, as Zosia chortled.

'You have snapchat?!'

'Not of my own free will, Dr Copeland made me download it and befriend him on it when he was drunk at Sacha's birthday, all that time ago. He thought it would be funny to, and I quote, get a selfie with Selfie', and with this he pulled out his phone and showed us the video of Matilda- she was lying on her tummy and then a hand started attaching fake eyebrows, a moustache and an evil pointy beard to our daughters face as she looked totally bewildered and then when Dom, and Sacha in the background, started laughing, she laughed too. _I love her little laugh, she's such a happy little thing..._

'You've had a big adventure today haven't yoooouuu?' Zosia cooed as she bounced Matilda up and down on her hip as Matilda laughed with delight. Their hearts melted and Zosia looked at Arthur.

'Dadda needs a cuddle' she whispered to Matilda and she passed her to Arthur and Matilda gurgled.

'She's been as good as gold, I should warn you though that I am going to make a neurosurgeon out of her yet...'

'Don't tell me you've been trying to explain the brain to her?' Zosia laughed, rolling her eyes.

'Didn't you do that with me when I was a baby?'

'Yes' Guy smiled proudly, putting his arm over her shoulder.

'I think between the efforts of you and Arthur, she's going to have an eclectic medical vocabulary before she can spell her own name...you suit being a granddad, by the way, you looked adorable with her down there' she smiled.

'Thanks...I think!' He chuckled.

'Did you have fun with grumpy Grampy and auntie Col poppet?' Zosia cooed as her daughter sat in Arthur's arms nibbling her fist. Zosia took her feet and blew a raspberry on them to make her laugh and squeal.

The young family went home and that evening as Matilda slept in her cot, Arthur and Zosia sat on the sofa and Zosia held him. He was still very upset about his friend, and she didn't want to pressure him to talk- she just wanted him to know she was there for him, and he knew she was Dom arrived home to find the pair of them asleep in each other's arms and he decided that there was mischief to be had.

He crept into Zosia's bedroom and found her makeup bag, and as he crept back into the room and positioned himself on a cushion in front of them on the sofa, he used her eyeliner to draw moustaches, whiskers and monobrows on their faces, and they didn't flinch until they heard whimpering come from Zosia's and Arthur's room, and Zosia and Arthur shot awake.

Zosia stood and went into her room to collect the baby and Arthur wiped his eyes as Dom sat opposite, looking smug and pleased with himself. Arthur noticed Dom smiling at him and immediately felt suspicious.

'What?' He asked, feeling nervous.

'Nothing' Dom replied, and then Zosia came back out, bouncing Matilda on her hip in an attempt to comfort her.

'Arthur we've run out of nappies in our room, can you get some out of the...Arthur what on earth has happened to your face?' She asked, looking confused, concerned but amused all at the same time. Arthur pushed his glasses up his nose and stuttered in response.

'What's happened to your face?', as he stood and the pair stepped towards the mirror in the hallway while Matilda continued to cry. As they stepped in front of the mirror, they shouted 'DOM!' as he laughed hysterically. Matilda was still crying and as Zosia and Arthur were reminded of their daughter's apparent discomfort, they decided to give her to uncle Dom.

'What?! I don't know what to do?!' He squealed with discontent as Matilda cried more and more.

'Consider it payback...you'll find nappies and wipes in Arthur's room, but don't leave her unattended even for a second, she's rolling over a lot lately' Zosia smirked as she kissed her daughter on the cheek.

'Even if I say sorry?!' He called out after the parents as Matilda carried on crying. Dom realised he had lost this particular battle, and he sighed. 'Right then you...I don't want to be here, you don't want to be here. Let's just get this over and done with shall we?' He grimaced.


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N Sorry it's been so long- I've been struggling with ideas but I think I'm getting back on track now. I'm hoping to update at least twice a week, but if any of you have any ideas, feel free to contact me! Full credit will be given, of course! Many thanks to NiamhMcGrady-Fanpage and perpetualpathology for your, as always, lovely reviews!**

 **These next two chapters introduce Arthur's parents- I honestly cant remember if they've ever been in the show or mentioned so I'm sorry if they have featured (either directly or being talked about!) and I'm way off! Anyway, I hope you enjoy these updates!**

'Did you pack any bottles?' Arthur called out into the flat as he went to carry some bags down to Zosia's car. The young family were going on a long weekend break to Cornwall to visit Arthur's parents, and because his family had never met Zosia and had not seen Matilda yet, Arthur was nervous. Zosia knew he was apprehensive about the family meeting...he hadn't had much to do with his family since he left home, but after his friends death he realised how important it was to see and spend time with his family and they had a lot of catching up to do.

'Yes, Arthur, relax. It's not like we're going into the outback, if we're forgotten something it won't be the end of the world'

'I don't know, their house is quite far out of Padstow' he frowned as he picked up Matilda and strapped her into the car seat.

The 5 hour journey from Holby to Padstow wasn't made particularly easy by the fact that Zosia was travel sick and Matilda was grizzly, but they finally made it to his parents cottage, located around 5 miles outside of Padstow. The sun was shining but it was cold being the middle of February, and the area surrounding their cottage was lush and green, with a coastal breeze as they were close to a coastal path. 'It'll be nice for walks and things' Zosia smiled as she picked up Matilda out of her car seat and followed Arthur to the front door.

They were greeted by Arthur's mum and dad. His mum, Jennifer, was around the same height as Zosia, slim, with dark wavy hair tied up into a bun and wearing a pink shirt, navy blue body warmer and jeans. His dad, Peter, was tall, slim, and wearing a shirt and corduroys, and wore glasses just like Arthur. They looked around the same age as Guy, and Arthur was a perfect combination of them.

'Arthur! Great to see you' his father approached them, putting his arms around him and hugging him, patting him on the back as Arthur did the same. Jennifer hugged him when Peter pulled away, and then they both smiled at Zosia and Matilda. 'And these must be the ladies in your life,' he smiled, and Arthur went to stand by Zosia. He put his arm around her waist and she smiled nervously.

'Yes, this is my partner Zosia, and our daughter Matilda'

'Nice to meet you, Zosia' they said, shaking her free hand, 'and you! Aren't you a cutie!' They cooed as Matilda took them in. Now at 5 months old, she had a thin layer of dark hair and Zosia's bright, beautiful blue eyes. Zosia bounced her gently to make her smile, and she grinned.

'That's the first time she's smiled all morning, she's been a bit grizzly' Zosia laughed.

'She's beautiful Arthur' Jennifer smiled with tears in her eyes, 'may I?' She gestured to Zosia, her arms out. Zosia passed Matilda over and she cried instantly, and it got progressively worse until Jennifer passed her to Peter, and then she calmed down.

'Lets go inside shall we?' Peter smiled, gesturing to the door. _I don't know what Arthur has been worrying about, they're lovely!_

They went inside and while Peter was busy getting to know his granddaughter, Jennifer was talking to Zosia, asking her all the usual questions a mother asks a potential daughter in law, about her background, family etc. they were having a lovely talk, but then the tone changed slightly.

'So when are you two getting married? I was rather surprised to hear you weren't married when you told us you had a child, Arthur' Jennifer stated, and Zosia and Arthur shot a look at each other.

'Umm, there are no plans at the moment mum' Arthur stuttered. 'We've only been together for about a year'

'So, you weren't together when Zosia fell pregnant?' She replied, sounding shocked. 'Artie, didn't we raise you better than that?' Arthur began to fidget nervously, and Zosia stepped in.

'Arthur and I have lived together for over 2 years, we've been through a lot together, and when I got pregnant it was 4 months or so before we decided to get together properly...he's always been there, he's always done the right thing' she explained. 'Matilda just sped up what we both wanted.'

'I just think that children should be born with a married mother and father, or at least engaged' she retorted, trying to sound innocent and holier-than-thou. _Oh...NOW I know..._

'Leave them alone, Jen, they have a beautiful little girl, they're an adorable couple, what does it matter that they're not married?' Peter chimed in, bouncing Matilda on his knee while she smiled and laughed.

'It'll give her more security, Arthur was always getting his heart broken...couples always break up over the tiniest things these days'

'Mum!' Arthur shouted, and then Zosia stepped in.

'Mrs Digby, I know you have your opinions and that's fine, but believe me, I have no intention of hurting Arthur or leaving him- he's been the most loving and caring boyfriend I have ever had, he's been there for me through so much, he's an amazing father and I love him.' She snapped. She didn't appreciate being made out to be like the other women he had been with who hurt him, and it annoyed her to think that someone she had only just met could have that opinion of her. Arthur had been out of touch with his parents for a long time and now it was like she was trying to be his main woman again.

'Jennifer, leave them be. They're happy' Peter warned, putting his hands on her shoulders to try and relax her. _I can see where he gets his kind nature from...and I can see where he gets his anxiety from too..._

Arthur and Zosia decided to retreat to their room to simmer, and Zosia was quite wound up. 'This is just what she's like...I've tried to stay away, not because I don't love my mum because of course I do, but she has very, um, firm opinions, and I felt like I couldn't live up to her expectations'

'She definitely seems full-on...' Zosia sighed, and Arthur could see she was uncomfortable. He placed his hands on her shoulders, and rubbed them up and down gently. Arthur could see she still looked a little bit rattled so he held his arms out and she moved into them and let him hold her, and then they kissed.

'They're obviously very proud of you, Arthur' she mumbled, 'I just wasn't expecting such a blunt woman to be your mum' she laughed, and Arthur did too before kissing her forehead.

'I fully intend to marry you one day, Zosia March, if you'll have me. I just want the time to be right' he admitted, and Zosia smiled to herself.

'You're not going anywhere Digby'


	30. Chapter 30

Zosia was hoping that the next day would be different, that maybe she was just being sensitive to Jennifer's comments. Arthur had warned her that she was fiercely protective of him and that was why he hadn't been in touch or to visit for a long time- he had wanted to be independent. It was a shame- she thought Peter was lovely.

When they went downstairs after feeding Matilda and getting dressed, Jennifer was sitting at the kitchen table reading the Sunday paper and drinking a coffee, and Peter was getting some more coffee prepared for their guests. Zosia and Arthur appreciatively took the coffee that he had made for them and joined Jennifer at the table.

'Sleep well darling?' She smiled at Arthur, and then nodded at Zosia.

They made small talk and Zosia could tell that Jennifer was working her way up to something...it didn't take long before she started to nose into their history...

'So you said you'd been through a lot together...what?'

 _I don't really see how it's any of your business..._ she thought. She sighed and prepared to admit to Jennifer and Peter exactly why she and Arthur were stronger than Jennifer was giving them credit for...

'I'm bipolar' she blurted. Jennifer and Peter looked shocked, but then while Jennifer's face didn't really change, Peter's softened.

'That must have been hard to admit' he smiled kindly as Matilda looked up at him, stroking his face. Then Zosia noticed that Jennifer looked like she wanted to say something...

'So...how is that affecting Arthur and Matilda?' She asked. _Wow, I can't believe the nerve of this woman..._

'It is under control. I stayed in a mother and baby unit with Matilda for a few weeks and it made me a better mother and much more in tune with my feelings...Arthur has been there from day one, since I was diagnosed, and he knows that for the sake of him and our daughter, that I want to be well. I'm keeping up with my meds, therapy, Occupational Health...it's all under control. It doesn't define me' she stated, bluntly. Arthur was silently proud of Zosia. 'Tell me Jennifer, do you have a problem with me?'

'No, no. I just want Arthur to have the best.' _What?!_

'What are you trying to say?' Zosia replied, inquisitively but suspicious. Arthur and Peter could sense the claws coming out, and as they looked like eh were going to try and step in, Jennifer came out with it.

'It sounds like your situation would bring even the most resilient person to stress...and I don't want that for Arthur and my granddaughter-' and then Arthur snapped. He couldn't stand it anymore. He stood, and approached his mum, taking hold of Zosia's hand.

'Mum! I love Zosia, yes she has bipolar, but it doesn't for a second change how I feel about her. She's a strong, loving, caring woman, and I love her' he said confidently. She looked shocked that he could stand up to her, and then he turned to Peter, who stood slowly. 'Dad, I think coming here was a mistake. It was lovely to see you, and I'm glad you finally got to meet Zosia and Matilda, but I think we'll be leaving now' he said, taking Matilda out of his arm. Peter smiled sadly.

'I understand...' He replied, as he followed Arthur and Zosia to their room where they collected their bags. As they reached the bedroom, Peter continued. 'I'm sorry about your mother...I don't know what's gotten into her. Zosia-' he turned to Zosia and took her hand, 'it was lovely to meet you. You're a lovely young woman, I can see your little family adore you, and I would very much like to be a part of your lives...I'm sorry that Jen has made you feel uncomfortable'.

Zosia smiled, and hugged Peter. 'Thank you Mr Digby...it's been lovely meeting you too- thank you for, you know...and I'd love for you to be part of Matilda's life'. Arthur smiled and then hugged his father.

'Mum hasn't changed then?' Arthur laughed and so did Peter.

'Don't worry, I'll have words' he frowned. 'Arthur, I'm very proud of you...I always have been'

'Thanks dad...Tilly say goodbye to grandpa' he smiled at Matilda as Zosia passed her to him.

'Goodbye sweetheart, be a good girl' he coped as she smiled at him. It was amazing how quickly Matilda had taken to Peter, and it was odd, because she cried as soon as Jennifer held her...she seemed to be a good judge of character.

Driving home, Matilda was asleep in her car seat, and Arthur and Zosia talked.

'Arthur? Thank you for everything' she smiled meekly, and Arthur smiled back, blowing her a kiss.


	31. Chapter 31

'Oh darling, it's ok, ssshhhhhh- Zosia! Can you come in here?- shhhhhhh' Arthur called out, focussing his attention between Matilda and Zosia. He was carrying Matilda around the flat, cuddling her and bouncing her gently as she cried. 'Zosia'

'what's wrong?' She panicked, stumbling out of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around her body and her hair dripping wet.

'Does she feel feverish to you?'

'She does feel warm...' She glanced at Arthur who was obviously worried. 'But I'd imagine it's just a cold, they have been going around...and her poor little nose is running like a tap'

'You're probably right...'

'She's been off her milk too, and she's teething, poor little mite' she cooed sympathetically as Matilda wailed. 'I know, it isn't fair is it?' She pouted before kissing her on the cheek. She was snotty, very warm and very restless. 'Arthur where is the infant paracetamol?'

'Bathroom cabinet, top shelf' he replied.

Zosia finished dressing and came out to relieve Arthur who was worrying as this was the first time Matilda had had a cold, and to come at the same time as teething seemed cruel to them... _as if my little flower wasn't suffering enough._ She came back with Matilda's teething ring, a mouth syringe and a couple of bottles of medicine. 'I'll give her some paracetamol now, and put some Vaseline on her nostrils to stop them from becoming irritated...Arthur wipe her nose, she can't blow' she rolled her eyes as Matilda's nose ran down her face, and Arthur wiped her nose gently.

Dom arrived home and resisted the urge to roll his eyes...'has she actually stopped crying since last night?' He winked, and Zosia glared at him.

'She has a cold and she's teething, give her a break' she replied. 'She'll tire out soon' she hoped...as much as she defended her daughter's complaining, she was tired and wouldn't mind having a few hours sleep. She and Arthur had hoped for some alone time to be couple-y the night before as Dom was doing a nightshift, but while Matilda was in so much discomfort they couldn't face it. Now they faced the day ahead on very little sleep and a poorly baby. The good thing, however, was that Guy and Jesse had arranged to come over. _Maybe they'll take pity on us and offer to babysit for a couple of hours_...she laughed to herself as Matilda cuddled her closely, still very uncomfortable and in pain.

'Zoshie you look tired' Guy laughed when he and Jesse arrived. Matilda had finally fallen asleep but Zosia was sure it wouldn't be for long. She smirked at her dad before hugging him. 'She has her first cold and she's teething...I don't think the poor thing can take much more pain'

'Ah yes I remember what it's like...'

'...you remember teething?' Zosia raised an eyebrow, smirking, and Guy shoved her playfully.

'No, I remember YOU teething. You cried for hours on end, nibbled on most of my shirts...none of mama's clothes, just mine' he sighed as Zosia laughed. 'But we ended up giving you chunks of cucumber to soothe your gums, and that lamb of yours was soaked 24/7' he laughed as Jesse peered down at her sleeping.

'She's a little cracker though, isn't she? Looks just like Arthur'

'She's so funny, she babbles to herself all the time, my little chatterbox'

'I remember when you were little, I asked Jesse to babysit and when we came home you were both playing a game in the garden in your paddling pool, splashing water, you loved it'

'Yeah we let Tilly knock over piles of blocks and make a noise, except when Arthur and Dom were playing Jenga while I was sitting next to them with her on my knee next to them, she knocked them over because she thought that was the point' she laughed, and then Arthur entered.

'Frank you look exhausted too!' Jesse laughed. 'When was the last time you had a decent nights kip?'

Zosia and Arthur thought hard...it had been a while, since Matilda had started teething. They shrugged and then Guy said the words Zosia was hoping to hear. 'Why don't we take her tonight? Give you two and Dom the night off from screaming babies? We're just watching the rugby anyway, she might even enjoy it'

'We couldn't do that, she'll cry too much' Zosia sighed, suddenly realising how cruel it would be to leave her in that state, and to let Guy and Jesse babysit her while she was poorly.

'It's ok, you deserve a night off, really, we can handle it'

Arthur and Zosia made the most of their night off and decided to have a date night. They got dressed up and went out for a meal, and then come home to an empty flat.

'Dom's on a night out with Essie isn't he?' Zosia smiled and Arthur agreed. He flirtatiously smirked, he knew what she was suggesting.

They kissed and then without even moving to the bedroom, their kisses got more passionate. However, while they were distracted, they didn't see Zosia's phone light up or ring because it was on silent, and Arthur's phone was in their room out of sight. Guy opened the door, and quickly shouted out when he saw something he really, really wished he hadn't seen...

'Zosia!'

'FUCK, DAD! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?!' She screeched as she stood abruptly.

'I need to pick up some clean clothes, Jesse decided to let her do some painting...I tried to tell him it's not a suitable activity for a 6 month old but then again what do I know, it's not like I've ever been a father to a baby or anything' he sighed sarcastically. '...more to the point why on earth are you doing... that...out here where anyone could walk in?!'

'Dom is out for the night with Essie, and to be fair we weren't expecting you and Jesse to get our daughter into such a mess that you'd need more clothes than we supplied you with...'

'First rule of babysitters, always provide the babysitters with more than they need. Second rule of babysitters, always provide the babysitters with more than they need when one of those babysitters is Mr Adrenaline, Jesse Law'

They were all horribly embarrassed so Zosia went into their room, pulled out some spare clothes for Matilda and thrust them into Guy's hands.

'Sorry I walked in on you but-'

'Dad we're not going to talk about this, thank you for watching Matilda, we'll see you tomorrow' she gabbled as she tried to get rid of him quickly. Arthur was yet to make eye contact with anybody, and then as Guy said his goodbyes and left, Zosia pounced on him again...although not before she double locked the door...

'Hey man what's up with you? You look like you've seen a ghost' Jesse laughed, lying in the sofa cuddling a tired Matilda who was wrapped in a towel having been given a bath by Guy before he left to get all the paint off of her. 'I admit now in hindsight that the painting wasn't the best idea...' He laughed, and noticed that Guy was still pale. 'What's wrong with you?'

'I just walked in on Arthur and Zoshie...um...you know' he trailed off. Jesse looked confused for a minute and the realisation hit him suddenly and he too looked uncomfortable and awkward.

'Mate they're probably more embarrassed than you...' He tried to reassure Guy, but he shook his head.

'Doubt it' he sulked as he looked at Matilda who was fast asleep. 'Come on, let's put her down before she wakes up again'.


	32. Chapter 32

**A/N Thank you NiamhMcGrady-fanpage for the kind review! I love your Essie idea, I've used it in the next chapter, so full credit to you!**

 **Sorry I'm so late in updating (twice a week, lol, that's going well so far!) but here are two chapters to make up for it ;-)**

'Arthur! Arthur come out here! Look! Dom! Dad!' Zosia screeched with excitement as she ran around the flat to try and gather the men. As Arthur and Guy ran from one of the bedrooms, they were flabbergasted and excited to see the now 7 month old Matilda crawling across the floor, smiling and laughing.

'What a clever little flower!' Guy smiled. 'You were quick to be on the move too, Zoshie, mama and I couldn't take our eyes off you for a second once you started crawling, you got everywhere. In cupboards, if we didn't have a stair gate you would have tried to go up and down the stairs too. Once we couldn't find you and then we heard Jesse yelling, you had crawled into the room he was staying in at the time and you were just lying on the rug with a toy we'd left in there' he laughed as Matilda then crawled into the hallway.

Dom stepped out of his room but got the shock of his life as he realised he nearly tripped over Matilda. 'Dom! Careful!' Zosia snapped as she went and retrieved her daughter.

'What?! Since when was she crawling?' He asked, confused and shocked

'Since about a minute ago' she sighed happily as Matilda fidgeted to let her mum know that she wanted to be on the floor again. 'Sorry Dom, I didn't mean to snap'

'This is perfect' Arthur whispered to Guy, who nodded in agreement. They had just been in Arthur's and Zosia's room having an important discussion...

 _ ***10 minutes previously..***_

'So, umm..yes, I have known Zosia for a long time, and the time we've been together has been the happiest of my life...'

'You'd better not be thinking of leaving Digby' Guy warned, his voice icy and sharp.

'What? No, no, oh god no' he stumbled as he realised Guy thought he was intending to leave. 'No, what I'm trying to say is, is that I'm in love with your daughter...and I'd like to ask for your blessing...to ask her to marry me...' Arthur thought his heart was going to make a quick exit from his throat as soon as he said those words. He watched Guy's facial expression closely, and he stood and then engulfed Arthur into a hug. Arthur immediately relaxed and then Guy smiled.

'You have my blessing- you make my daughter the happiest I have ever seen her, how could I not bless this marriage?' He smiled. 'How do you think you'll ask her?'

 _ ***present***_

'Arthur she's moving!' Zosia laughed, very proud of her little monkey. Arthur smiled back and put his arm over Zosia's shoulder as they all watched Matilda crawl around, looking incredibly excited.

Arthur had ideas for the proposal racing through his mind...grand gesture in a restaurant? No, probably not, she doesn't really like embarrassment...placing clues around Holby for her to find, like in films? No, she'd probably get bored. But now that Matilda was crawling, he thought it would be a great opportunity to get her involved...something personal and intimate...

Zosia had arranged to meet Colette for a meal that evening, so Arthur, Jesse, Dom, Sacha and Guy played poker round Guy's while they babysat (which was easier nowadays because Matilda was back to sleeping well), and Arthur filled them in on his plans...and he was thrilled that all the guys thought his idea was brilliant...

It took a couple of days to execute Arthur's big plan. Guy and Dom helped him to choose the engagement ring, a gorgeous white gold band with a single diamond, and got a few other bits essential for Arthur's plan. He decided to propose when he had a day off, and when he was sure Zosia wasn't going to come out into the living room, he got Matilda ready ...

Zosia was lying on the bed, reading her book when Arthur called in 'Zosh, Tilly's on her way in for a cuddle' and sure enough, at that moment, Matilda crawled in and made a beeline for the bed, looking up at her mummy with excitement. Zosia reached down, picked her up and sat her on her knees and noticed that not only was Matilda wearing a bracelet, but attached to that bracelet was a white gold diamond ring...she looked at it for a moment in confusion and then noticed that Matilda was wearing a t-shirt that she hadn't seen before...and when she read it, her mouth dropped open and she gasped. The white shirt read, in red writing, 'Mummy, will you marry daddy?'

'...Arthur?' She called out. _What on earth...it was only a couple of months ago that we weren't ready...but...wow, oh my god_ she smiled. Arthur stepped into their room with his tail between his legs, and sat down on the bed next to Zosia, who was now crying with excitement.

'Arthur you're such a nerd' Zosia cried smiling. She stroked his face affectionately before kissing him. 'And that's why I love you. Yes' she wept the happiest tears since Matilda was born. 'Yes, of course I'll marry you!'

Arthur thought his heart was going to explode. He threw his arms around his now fiancee's waist and kissed her passionately before he pulled away, stood Zosia up and then got down on one knee. 'I want to do it properly as well' he snuffed happily as Zosia wept, and laughed.

'As soon as I met you, I knew one day I would marry you'

'Really?' She winked and Arthur laughed. 'I could have sworn you were a little, what's the word? Ambivalent towards me when I started...' she winked.

'Well...maybe not, but you make me the happiest I have ever been. You're a perfect woman, a perfect mother, and I would remain to be the happiest man alive if you do me the honour of becoming my wife'

Zosia smiled and nodded ecstatically, and he slipped the ring onto her finger, before standing to meet Zosia throwing her arms around his shoulders and kissing him.


	33. Chapter 33

'Morning dad' Zosia smiled as she entered Guy's office the next day. She was in dropping off Arthur and decided to stop in and see her dad with Matilda.

'Ah darling- let me see!' He laughed as Zosia smiled confused.

'How did you know?!'

'Arthur asked for my permission' he smiled, and then she smiled and held out her left hand to reveal the engagement ring she was wearing. Guy smiled 'perfect- Arthur is a good and lucky man' he smiled, bringing Zosia into a hug as she hugged him back. 'I'd like to take you both out tonight to celebrate, my treat'

'But we'll need a babysitter'

'No need- I spoke to Dr Copeland. I promised he could assist in theatre next week if he watched Matilda this evening. He mentioned something about Nurse Harrison helping him...does he really need help?'

'He's fine with entertaining her, but when she cries or needs feeding or changing, he can't cope' Zosia laughed.

 _ **Later that evening…**_

'I think Essie's broody' Dom laughed as Matilda crawled around her playpen. Dom was sitting on the sofa next to the playpen, dangling a teddy and tossing it to various ends and watching Matilda crawl after it and then tossing another toy in at the opposite end and watching her fetch it.

'I can't thank her enough for agreeing to help watch Tilly' Zosia smiled, putting on some earrings and then starting to apply her makeup. 'And will you stop playing fetch with my daughter? She's not a dog. Just let her play' she laughed. Dom smiled apologetically. 'What makes you think she's broody?'

'I saw her with a patient's 3 year old son today, she looked like she was having the time of her life, running after him and playing. I bet she'll love looking after this little one. I caught her having cuddles with another patient's baby yesterday as well...I wonder whether I should warn Sacha...'

'You'll do no such thing!' Zosia laughed. 'So did you invite her to help so you could assess her on this theory of yours?'

'You make it sound so calculated..but, yes' Dom laughed as the doorbell rang. He greeted Essie who came in and smiled at Zosia, and went to hug her.

'Congratulations Zosia, Arthur and Dom told me the news' Essie smiled and Zosia pulled away, smiling

'Thank you! I still can't believe it' she smiled, 'and thank you for coming to help watch little Dynamo over there' she laughed, pointing to Matilda. Essie nodded, laughing and wandered over to the playpen to find Matilda playing by herself.

'I can't get over just how much she looks like the two of you' she gasped as Zosia picked Matilda up.

'You'll need to keep a close eye, Essie- Dom doesn't do grumpy Matilda very well' Zosia poked her tongue out at Dom, passing Matilda to Essie.

'This little lady does grumpy?! Oh noo we don't want that, do we lovely?' Essie cooed as she bounced Matilda gently while she smiled and laughed.

'Thank you both so much' Zosia smiled gratefully as she grabbed her handbag. 'Arthur, are you coming or what?'

'I can't decide whether to wear a tie or not...' He stumbled out of the bedroom, looking down at three different ties he had in his hands. Zosia smirked.

'Just wear your dickie-bow' she laughed as Arthur shoved her playfully. She took a dark blue tie out of his hand and proceeded to put it around his neck, tucking it under the collar of his shirt.

'Don't they make an adorable couple?' Dom smirked and Essie laughed.

 _ **Later…**_

'Where is thumbkin? Where is thumbkin?- Dom, come on, join in-' Essie sang as she hid her thumbs in a fist while Matilda watched intently, smiling. Dom rolled his eyes and joined in, and then they carried on singing the song as each of their thumbs came out, with a face drawn on them, and started 'talking to each other' while Essie carried on with the song.

'What is this doing again?'

'Helping with her fine hearing and motor skills- if we get the pen we can draw the faces on her thumbs as well and we can help with the movements.'

'But does she understand?' Dom frowned, looking cynical. Essie rolled her eyes.

'We encourage her to wave at her new friends, and we can help her make the gestures with her hands- it's just a bit of fun Dom' she smiled as she picked up Matilda and put her on her knee. Dom smiled. She looked like a natural with her, and Dom was desperate to bring up the subject of his suspicions...

'You want one don't you?' He blurted out and Essie looked at him, her eyes wide with shock.

'What makes you think that?'

'Just how you are with kids these days...I can just tell'

'Shut up' she laughed, nudging him as Matilda started to cry. Dom smiled knowingly as Essie cuddled her and tried to comfort her.

'Whatever you say.,,you're a natural with babies though' he replied as Matilda quickly settled.

Zosia, Arthur, Guy and Colette arrived back at the flat to find Matilda asleep on Essie, and Dom and Essie watching a film.

'Thank you both so much for this evening' Zosia smiled as she gently picked up Matilda and took her into the bedroom to put her down.

'It was my pleasure, you have a darling little girl' Essie smiled. 'Did you have a good night?'

'It was great, thank you' Arthur smiled. 'Now, you're welcome to crash here if you like?' He offered.

'It's ok, but thank you' she smiled, grabbing her bag and coat. Arthur held out £40 which Essie turned down. 'Honestly, I don't mind, it was nice to meet her and spend an evening with Dom just chilling instead of drinking' she laughed. After she, Colette and Guy left, Zosia and Arthur spoke to Dom.

'So? Still think she's broody?'

'Err yes!' He replied. 'She doesn't admit it, but I won't be surprised if this time next year we are babysitting for a mini-Essie or mini-Sacha' he laughed.


	34. Chapter 34

'Mama!' Matilda squealed as Zosia picked her up and swung her around. It was her 1st birthday and Zosia was in full swing celebration mode. Zosia kissed her on the cheek repeatedly as Matilda giggled.

'I can't believe our little pickle is one! Crazy isn't it?!' Zosia smiled as Arthur entered the room. Matilda held her arms out to Arthur and he took her.

'This time last year she was well and truly on her way' Arthur remembered fondly, and Zosia smiled but grimaced.

'Never known pain like it' she shuddered. 'She's worth it though. I can't wait for her party!'

'Neither can we' Arthur smiled as Matilda fidgeted out of his arms and went walking around. 'I don't think I'll be able to keep a straight face if your dad starts playing tea parties with her new set though' he laughed. Zosia laughed too.

'Trust me, madam wears the trousers in her relationship with her granddad. If Matilda wants him to play tea parties and wear silly hats, he will. She's got him wrapped around her little finger and she's only 1, I've taught her well' she laughed.

'Did I hear something about a tea set?' Dom asked, coming out of his room. 'Isn't she still a bit young to know what to do with that?'

'It's pretty basic, it's designed for 1 year old kids and up, it's fine'

'Are you going to play Dom?' Zosia winked and Dom rolled his eyes. 'Oh come on Uncle Dom, don't be a spoilsport' she pouted. 'I expect daddy will be playing' she laughed, looking at Arthur who was now running after Matilda. Dom grimaced

'It weirds me out when you call each other mummy and daddy' he poked his tongue out and Zosia smiled, poking hers out back as the bell rang. It was Guy, Colette and Jesse arriving to celebrate Matilda's birthday. As they arrived, Matilda approached Guy and he picked her up.

'Happy birthday darling' Guy fussed as he kissed her on the cheek. 'You wait until next year, you'll understand what all the excitement is then!'

'Papa' she babbled as Guy gave her all his attention. During the day they talked about the wedding, played with Matilda and tried to teach her how to use the toy tea set, and Dom was smug when it became obvious that it was too old for her to understand, but Matilda did manage to get Guy to wear a flowery hat which amused everyone.

'Dad? We were thinking about the wedding...what church did you and mama get married in?'

'We had two ceremonies...one in Poland and one another here...the Polish wedding was very traditional, in the church your mama was christened in and went to when she was growing up, the ceremony here was more of a blessing...why?'

Zosia looked at Arthur- they had thought about getting married in Poland so that Zosia's elderly grandparents could be there, and inviting their friends and family out there, and having the marriage blessed back in England and having the reception. 'We were just thinking...as a way of bringing mama into it...that we'd have a ceremony in Podlaska...so babcia and dziadek can come...and you guys come out too...then have it blessed back here...' she replied, hesitantly and nervously. She was relieved to hear that this was how her parents had gotten married, and she was even more relieved when she saw Guy smiling, and he pulled her into a hug.

'I think that's a lovely idea Zoshie...but what about Arthur's family?'

'I'm inviting them...I'm not sure if they'll come...we're still not on good terms with my mum after how she behaved when we visited, but my dad will probably talk her round and tell her to behave. Besides, they like Poland, they took me there as a child and told me all about the war and history...the ceremony, we thought, could be for close family and friends and then the blessing and reception for everyone'

'So that's where your love of history comes from' Jesse laughed as he play-chased Matilda around.


	35. Chapter 35

2 weeks later, and it was Zosia's first day back at work, and although she was nervous about being back, she knew she would miss Matilda. She had arranged for her to go into the crèche for some of her shifts so at least she'd be in the hospital with her and Arthur. Zosia's first patient back as a CT1 in neurosurgery was a young woman, Tricia, slightly older than Zosia, who had a brain tumour that Guy was going to try and remove. As she settled Tricia in, she noticed that she was upset, as if she had been crying.

'Are you ok? I know it's frightening but Mr Self is a brilliant surgeon...he's done this operation hundreds of times before-'

'I'm just...I don't know...I'm terrified. I'm terrified that even if I make it, my children won't have a mother...I know the risks'

'It's ok' Zosia soothed, sitting down next to her. 'How many do you have?'

'Two' Tricia sniffed. 'A boy and a girl' she added, reaching for a photo of them she kept in her purse. 'That's Caleb, he's 5...and that's Sarah, she's 2...' She continued as she welled up again. Zosia passed her a tissue and placed a reassuring hand on hers. 'Do you have children?'

Zosia wasn't sure whether to answer or not...she wasn't really supposed to talk about her private life but she felt like it would help Tricia if they bonded...'Yes, I have a daughter' Zosia smiled. 'Matilda, she's just turned 1'

'It's hard to imagine being without them isn't it?' Tricia sniffed, and Zosia nodded in understanding and agreement. 'Can you do something for me?'

'Yes, of course' Zosia replied, putting her chat back into the end of her bed.

'Can you call their father? We're not together, but I just want to see them one last time before I go in...' Tricia pleaded. Zosia's heartstrings pulled as she nodded and headed over to the nurses station to phone Tricia's ex, just as Guy appeared, walking with urgency and drive, carrying some scans and an iPad.

'Tricia I'm afraid it isn't good news...the tumour has caused your brain to form an aneurysm, and we only have theatre slots now, or later this evening, so I'd like to get you in now as opposed to later today if that's ok..'

Tricia looked scared and shocked. 'But the doctor, she's just gone to call for my children...I really want to see them before we go in...'

'I'm afraid we don't have time for that' Guy sadly concluded as Zosia came back over.

'They'll be here in about half an hour...what's wrong?' Zosia asked, sensing a tense atmosphere.

'She needs to be in theatre, now, there's an aneurysm and we can't afford to wait for her original slot...' Guy said urgently as nurses prepared Tricia for surgery. She as crying, obviously scared and Zosia was torn.

'But dad, it's risky, what about saying goodbye to her children?' Zosia whispered quietly.

'Zosia, it's imperative that we operate as soon as possible, you know that...'

'But dad, her kids-'

'Dr March, I won't tell you again. We cannot wait. Now are you scrubbing in or are you determined to carry on arguing?' He snapped. _Oh for crying out loud...half an hour won't hurt, why doesn't he see that?!_ Zosia sighed as she followed her father to theatre to scrub in. She was wound up and she couldn't shake how she was feeling...it was like how things were before, when Guy had just started working at Holby and demanded that Zosia worked on a case with him, pressuring the patient into a procedure.

The procedure was a success as as Tricia was in recovery, Guy approached Zosia who was doing her obs. 'Dr March, is there something you want to say?' He could sense that she was annoyed with him, she had hardly said a word in theatre. Zosia turned around to face him.

'Couldn't it have waited, just for half an hour?'

'Every minute counts with an aneurysm that large, you know that'

'All she wanted was to see her children again, just in case it was goodbye- what if that had been me and Tilly? Would you have refused to wait?'

'Darling, I know it's your first day back, but please, just think about this logically for a second' Guy said calmly, rubbing his hands up and down her arms. 'Please. I know what you're thinking, that it's how it was before, everyone do what I say or else, but I promise you, the patient comes first, every time. I wasn't trying to be difficult...and as it was, we got to the aneurysm just in time, her prognosis would have been a lot worse had we left it...had it just been the tumour, it would have been easier to hold off. We saved her life Zoshie, she may live to see a few more Christmases yet' he smiled, and Zosia sighed. She knew he was right…

His hands stayed on her arms and he slowly moved them round into a hug, which she reciprocated.

'I'm sorry dad...' She sighed as he kissed her on the top of the head.

'You don't need to be...you were looking out for the patient' he reassured her.


	36. Chapter 36

**A/N Many thanks for the review NiamhMcGrady-Fanpage for the review! I have used your idea in this chapter, so thank you and full credit to you!**

 **The story has a little twist and surprise for the next couple of chapters which I'm uploading this evening- hope you all enjoy!**

'Arthur, hold her hand and encourage her to walk towards you' Zosia smiled, holding up her phone to film her partner and daughter. 'I think she'll be walking unaided before long, she's had a lot of practice'. Matilda had been able to walk along when holding onto furniture but Zosia and Arthur were trying to encourage her to walk on her own but she wasn't very confident at walking. She was quite unsteady on her feet, which prompted Dom to nickname her 'Bambi' but they were seeing her make real progress. 'That's it darling, well done!' Zosia cooed as they watched Matilda take some small steps towards Arthur, while he held one of her hands. Matilda smiled as Arthur cuddled her.

'Shall we try and get her to walk towards you?' Arthur asked, looking at the short distance between the two of them. Zosia nodded and put her phone down and settled herself on her knees, about 5/6 ft away from Arthur. Arthur initially supported Matilda by holding her hand and then let go and to their amazement, she kept walking. She was a little unsteady still but she didn't fall, and Zosia held her arms out.

'That's it darling!' Zosia gasped, a huge, proud smile on her face. Matilda grinned back and then fell into Zosia's arms as she planted dozens of kisses on her daughter's head. 'I'm so proud of you, my clever girl' Zosia smiled, and then she felt something...like her stomach churning. She frowned slightly in discomfort and Arthur noticed this.

'Are you ok Zosh?' He asked, standing up and sitting on the sofa behind her, placing a hand on her shoulder. 'You're a bit pale...'

Zosia nodded, slightly uncertain. 'Yeah, just a bit nauseous-'

'Right Diggers, you ready?' Dom asked, coming out of his room. He and Arthur were going out to buy their suits for the wedding. 'Alright Zosh?'

'Zosia isn't feeling well...' Arthur asked, looking concerned, as Matilda started to walk towards Dom.

'Guys I'm fine, I probably ate something past it's best' Zosia reasoned as Dom picked up Matilda who had started to stumble just before she got to Dom who had caught her.

'Bambi's hero to the rescue' he laughed as he held Matilda out in front of him on her front, swing her gently so it was like she was flying and she squealed with excitement. 'Are you ok Zosh?' He asked, turning his attention back to his friend. Zosia nodded.

'I'm fine, have fun guys' she smiled as she took Matilda from Dom. Arthur wasn't convinced but he'd always been a worrier. Zosia kissed Arthur and then the guys left, and Zosia settled back down to help Matilda with her walking, this time holding her hands above her head as she circled the living room and kitchen. After about 10 minutes, however, Zosia's nausea returned and she quickly put Matilda on the floor safely near some of her toys and hurried into the bathroom to throw up.

After a few moments she felt like she could move so she headed back out to the living room where Matilda was playing with her toys. Zosia smiled. 'Aren't you good?' She smiled as she sat back into the sofa and lay down. She figured a rest may help, and then Matilda climbed up and cuddled into Zosia for a snooze. Zosia stroked her hair until she was asleep and then carried her out to their bedroom, before feeling queasy again.

 _'Great, my day off and I get a bloody vomiting bug'_ she sulked after she threw up again. She had been feeling more tired than usual in the past few weeks, but had been putting it down to being back to work doing shifts, but then she also realised...her period was late...

Zosia had managed to keep Arthur and Dom out of the loop by acting completely normal for the rest of the day, and had gone out to buy a pregnancy test. That night Zosia struggled to sleep with anticipation, but eventually at 6.30am, she had had enough of waiting...besides, she knew that she needed to wait until she woke up when the hCG hormone levels in her urine would be at their highest, making any result more accurate.

 _'Right...let's do this'_ Zosia whispered to herself as she climbed out of bed, careful not to wake Arthur. After she took the test, she crept back into the bedroom, shaking Arthur. 'Arthur wake up' Zosia whispered, turning on the bedside lamp, and Arthur squeezed his eyes shut as they adjusted to the light. He looked at the time. It was only 6.30- he didn't have to be at work for 2 hours, and Zosia had a late shift, so he couldn't understand why he was awake.

'Arthur I have to talk to you...'

He sighed and sat up, rubbing his tired eyes. 'What's going on Zosh?'

She looked like she was looking for the right words to say something but then she sat next to him, and turned towards him...

'What would you say...if I told you we're having another baby?' she whispered smiling, holding up the positive pregnancy test that she had just taken moments before waking Arthur up. 'I think I'm about 8 weeks...'

'Oh my god' he stuttered, and Zosia looked at him, hoping for a reaction.

'Arthur?'

'Oh my god...' he smiled, pulling her in for a hug. 'Are you sure?'

'100%..Arthur, I'm pregnant' she smiled, welling up with happiness, and they kissed. 'Let's not tell anyone yet...it'll be a surprise...we could tell people at the wedding' Zosia smiled and Arthur agreed.


	37. Chapter 37

A week later, they were doing well at keeping their secret. Zosia's morning sickness wasn't as severe as when she was pregnant with Matilda, and even Dom had no idea, and he was normally very astute. However, their secret was threatened to be revealed when in the middle of the night, Zosia was awoken by sudden, severe pain in her abdomen and pelvis. _Fuck owwww oh no, please no..._

'Arthur wake up, please' Zosia panicked, shaking him awake. He woke up and immediately saw the look of fear and terror on her face. He sat up and put his arm around her.

'What's wrong?' He asked, putting on his glasses. She was starting to cry.

'It really hurts, help me' she cried. 'This isn't right...' She wept. Arthur scrambled out of bed and shoved on some clothes before helping Zosia stand, putting an arm around her waist to support her. She was crying, scared, in pain, and all Arthur wanted to do was make it all stop. Then he remembered something- Matilda.

Arthur helped Zosia into the living room and sat her down on the sofa while he ran to Dom's room and banged on the door. 'Dom! Wake up!' He called in. He heard some groaning coming Fromm the room and the footsteps come towards the door which flew open, and a tired and annoyed looking Dom glared at him, arms crossed and leaning against the doorway.

'What do you want? I have work tomorrow'

'Something's wrong with Zosia, I'm taking her to hospital' Arthur panicked and Dom's face softened and turned to worry.

'Oh my god what's wrong?'

'...I think it's a miscarriage...' He replied reluctantly as the pair hurried back to Zosia.

'What?! Since when was Zosh pregnant again?!' Dom gasped, kneeling in front of Zosia, putting a comforting hand on her knee.

'8 or 9 weeks...anyway, we need you to watch Tilly, and can you phone ahead for us?'

Dom nodded, 'of course, go go!' He encouraged as they left the flat. Arthur helped Zosia into the car and he drove as quickly as he could to the hospital where they were met in the car park by Sacha and Mr T.

As Arthur jumped out of the drivers seat, he ran round to Zosia's side and helped her out of the car. As she doubled over, he put his arm around her waist and let her hold onto him. She was bleeding and crying from the pain she was in. 'Arthur I'm scared' she cried. Sacha and Mr T ran over, and Mr T took control.

'We've cleared a side room on Keller, let's get her up there...now Zosia, how far along do you think you are?'

'I think I'm about 9 weeks- ahhhh!' She groaned, as Zosia doubled over. 'Please, help me, don't let me lose it.'

All that time they thought they knew what was happening but after Mr T performed a scan, nothing could prepare them for what he had to say to them...

'I'm afraid it's an ectopic pregnancy, and because of the amount of pain you're experiencing, your hormone levels are high and we have a heartbeat, I'm going to have to perform a laparoscopy to remove the embryo...'

Zosia and Arthur looked horrified and scared. _What? Why is this happening? What have I done, I've been looking after myself, why?!_ Zosia welled up and Arthur squeezed her hands.

'What's going to happen? What's the recovery time?'

'The laparoscopy should be possible, although it may be that we have to remove one of Zosia's Fallopian tubes, depending on damage. The scan shows that it hasn't ruptured yet but there may still be damage...however, with the other healthy tube there Zosia should be able to become pregnant again in future. The recovery time is different for everyone, but with a laparoscopy she can be doing gentle exercise within 2 weeks. The emotional recovery time, however, we can't know that.' Zosia was in shock- they'd only just found out about the second baby and were so excited to give Matilda a brother or sister, and it was almost like her mind had shut down to block any emotion coming through. Arthur nodded in understanding and squeezed Zosia's hand. 'Zosia, can you sign this consent form to go into theatre?' Mr T frowned as he passed Zosia a clipboard. She signed it and then tears started to roll down her cheek again. _I've failed my baby...I've failed my family..._

Arthur paced around in the corridor outside theatre, anxious that the operation could mean that Zosia's fertility would be affected, and he was worried about how it would affect her emotionally. He phoned Guy, figuring Zosia would want him there. He wasn't best pleased about being woken up initially but when Arthur explained what had happened, Guy hurried to the hospital. They both waited nervously, and then Mr T greeted them outside theatre.

'How is she?' Arthur asked, nervous. Guy put a hand on his should to reassure him.

'I've successfully removed the embryo...I'm so sorry' Mr T frowned, solemnly. Arthur nodded, looking down, upset. 'Unfortunately there was damage to Zosia's Fallopian tube where the embryo embedded, and we had no choice but to remove it...'

'Does that mean she can't have any more children?'

'It's ok, she can still become pregnant and carry a baby to full term' Mr T reassured, and the two men nodded. 'Now, she's in recovery, you can sit with her if you like' Mr T said kindly. 'And Arthur...I'm so sorry' he frowned, sadly.

When Zosia came round and remembered what had happened, she started to cry. Arthur hadn't left her side, and he held her hand and kissed her forehead. 'Zosh I'm so sorry'.

Zosia turned her head away and a single tear flowed down her cheek followed by another, and another, until she was fully, and uncontrollably, sobbing. Arthur sat holding her hand, gently squeezing it, crying for the baby they'd lost. He stood, stroked her hair and wiped her tears. 'I'm so sorry Arthur' she cried. 'You must think I'm useless'

Arthur was shocked that she could even think this, so he held her hand tighter to reassure her.

'I want to discharge myself' she blurted as she suddenly started to sit up and Arthur tried to stop her, but she shook him off. 'I just want to get home to Matilda and get back to normal.'

'Zosia, you've just had surgery, you can't leave.'

'Arthur please!' She cried out of frustration just as Guy re-entered the room.

'Zoshie?' He asked, looking concerned. 'Darling I'm so sorry' he said, sitting and taking her hand.

'Dad I want to go home' she cried, and Guy kissed her temple, shaking his head sadly.

'You can't Zoshie...you need to recover...it could be a couple of days, but we'll have you back at home as soon as we can' he replied. 'Do you want to talk about what's happened?' He asked, caringly, and she shook her head. 'Ok...just rest sweetheart' he said quietly.

 **A/N I'm sorry if any readers don't like the sudden change of tone in the story! It'll be more upbeat in a couple of chapters, I promise** **I just wanted to write something where it isn't all happy all the time, but showing how strong the relationship between Zosia and Arthur is in the story**


	38. Chapter 38

**A/N Thank you NiamhMcGrady-fanpage for once again reviewing, you're too kind**

 **And I've been looking at my stats and this has been getting a lot of views, so I'd like to thank everyone who has been reading so far**

'Welcome back Zosia' Sacha smiled as the CT1 stepped behind the nurses station about 3 weeks after her surgery. She smiled at him and replied with a 'good morning' but barely said anything else. Sacha noticed that she seemed, almost shy, but also knew that when things were tough, she liked to throw herself into her work. Guy was helping to keep her busy but even when he tried talking to her, she refused to indulge it. Sacha kept an eye on her during the day whenever she wasn't in theatre with Guy, and half way into her shift, Arthur phoned the ward to speak to Sacha...

Arthur was worried. Zosia had barely spoken about what had happened to him, Dom or Guy, and the three of them were concerned that the apparent denial she was in was bad for her mental health. She had been working hard at home, and playing with Matilda, and Arthur wanted to give Sacha the heads up. However, Sacha wanted to speak to her to make sure she was ok.

'You know, Zosia, many women who have ectopic pregnancies and go on to have perfectly normal and health pregnancies later on-' he began, and Zosia sat down.

'I know what you're trying to do, Mr Levy...Arthur and Dom have spoken to you, haven't they?'

'...Yes' he admitted, 'but they're just concerned.'

Zosia sighed, 'is it to do with my bipolar?' She asked, and Sacha stood and walked to the other side of the desk sitting on the edge and reassuringly patted her on the shoulder. 'Why is it that whenever anything happens and I try dealing with it in my own way, everyone just assumes that my bipolar is acting up?!' she frowned. 'They're bad as dad'

'You know you can talk to us?' Sacha said, gently and Zosia nodded.

'I'm taking my meds, I'm talking to my psychiatrist. I'm fine' she sighed, although deep down she knew why they were concerned. She hadn't dealt with grief well in the past and when she was as emotionally shut down as she was, they were concerned that her bipolar would manifest itself again.

Later when she got home, Zosia was cautious and knew that Arthur would try and bring up the subject about what had happened. She opened the door and she was greeted by Matilda who, to Zosia's amusement, was wearing a minion onesie that Arthur had bought her that day. She stood in front of Zosia and lifted her arms up.

'Uh' Matilda reached up, wanting to be picked up, and Zosia smiled down and lifted her.

'You're very clean my girl' she smiled, kissing her on the cheek. She was relieved that Arthur had given her a bath. After such a busy day, all she wanted was to relax, and Matilda would have been going to bed soon.

Arthur came out into the hallway, having been cooking dinner, and greeted her with a kiss.

'How was your day?' He asked, sounding encouraging.

'Yeah it was fine...spent most of the day in theatre with dad...oh and I had an interesting conversation with Sacha. Why did you call him?' She asked. She wasn't annoyed, but she didn't understand why everyone was making such a fuss over her. _Yes, something bad happened, but it's happened..._ Itwas hard on Arthur but he knew that it was way harder on Zosia...

'Zosia you've barely said a word since we lost the baby...I'm worried about you, we all are.'

'Arthur...' She began, sitting down and gesturing that he joined her. 'I'm fine. Yes it's a shame and I am feeling sad about it, but it wasn't meant to be, I'm trying to live with that. I'm taking my meds and talking through everything with my psychiatrist. I'm getting there' she defended. 'Besides, we need to look to the future- we're getting married in a few weeks! I'll never live a day where I won't think about the baby...but we can't bring him back' she frowned. Arthur smiled at her gently, and kissed her on the cheek.

'I'm so proud of you' he smiled, stroking her cheek. Zosia smiled and kissed him, before they were pulled apart by Matilda. They laughed and looked at her with a shocked look on their faces.

'Oh excuse me' Zosia laughed and Matilda kissed her and then Arthur. 'She's an affectionate little thing isn't she?'

'She just didn't want to be left out' Arthur laughed as Matilda climbed over onto his knee and cuddled into him in the same way as she had been with Zosia. 'Daddy's girl' he laughed as he passed her a pen to play with. She lifted it up to him and tried to speak and although nobody could understand what she was saying, they still found it adorable.


	39. Chapter 39

Zosia and Dom arrived home from work to find Arthur having a little bit of trouble disciplining a 15 month old Matilda, who was standing on the coffee table. He had been intending to pack to go to Poland a few days later for their wedding, but his daughter was driving his patience and making him lose his mind with worry as she stood on the table, seemingly unphased by her father's cross exterior.

'Matilda Rose Digby, I won't tell you again, get down' Arthur scolded, pointing to the ground in front of the coffee table as Matilda stood, looking up at him.

'No!' She shouted, staying put.

'I mean it young lady, now'

Matilda scowled and shouted back what was roughly translated from 15 month old babble as 'Leave me alone' and as the three had spent a lot of time around Matilda when she was speaking, or trying to speak, they knew what she meant...

'Did she just try to say, leave me alone?' Dom smirked and Zosia nodded, laughing. Dom and Zosia were in stitches as Arthur was taken aback.

'She's definitely your daughter' he turned to Zosia who went and picked Matilda up to put her down on the floor while she screamed. 'She learnt that from you, because she definitely didn't get it from me...'

'Calm down Digby' Zosia sighed. 'Why didn't you just pick her up and put her down?'

'Because she just kept climbing back up' Arthur replied, exasperated, as Matilda climbed back up with a cheeky grin on her face. 'Just like that'

'I've been dreading the day she can climb...' Zosia frowned. 'Come on you, we have to get you all packed'

Zosia picked up Matilda and carried her into the bedroom, and Arthur carried on trying to pack, and then Matilda ran out wearing her hat and a pair of Zosia's sunglasses which were both too big for her.

'Oh beautiful' Arthur laughed as Matilda walked around and then the glasses came off. 'We really have to watch this little Dynamo, here one minute and gone the next' Zosia laughed as she came out of her room, and Matilda gave Zosia's glasses back to her. 'Ta!' She smiled as Matilda tried climbing again, but this time Zosia picked up and put her back down onto the floor repeatedly as she kept trying. 'Ohhhh no you don't' she warned as Matilda looked up at her. In the end, Zosia just picked Matilda back up and carried her into her room to play, and Arthur asked to speak to Dom in private.

'What is it Diggers? You're not getting cold feet are you?' Dom asked, worried.

'No! No not at all, I just need a favour...'

'...go on?' Dom replied, suspicious. Arthur shuffled slightly and reached under the couples bed and pulled out a box. It was rather dusty and a bit bent and misshapen, but when he took off the lid it revealed a beautiful white lace veil, embellished with floral mesh and lace patterns.

'It was Zosia's mothers. She doesn't know that I have it. Mr Self gave it to me to take with us to give to her as a surprise, but if I pack it she'll most likely see it- can you pack it?'

'What makes you think I have room? Besides, shouldn't it be Colette's job as her bridesmaid? Or why can't Mr Self?'

'Please Dom, I won't ask you to do anything else' Arthur sighed, and Dom smirked.

'Of course I will. I love winding you up Diggers' Dom sniggered, picking up the box.

That evening, Arthur, Dom, Guy, Jesse and a few others from the hospital went out for Arthur's stag do. They started at Albies where after a few pints, Jesse and Dom collaborated and bought the group some shots. Arthur was getting tipsy rather quickly, and the men had a plan...

"Relax Digby, I know I'm going to be your father in law in a few days…but I want you to enjoy yourself…but any shenanigans and trust me, you'll wish you were never born" Guy said, his voice deadpan and his face lacking expression. Arthur looked confused for a moment.

"Mr Self…Jesse hasn't ordered a stripper has he?" he asked, worriedly, and Guy started laughing.

"I couldn't keep this up, sorry Digby. No, there is no stripper, I wouldn't allow it" he laughed, putting his arm over Arthur's shoulder and giving him another a shot. Arthur took the shot and the rest of the night was blur for him…after several hours, Jesse and Dom had succeeded in stereotypically tying Arthur to a lamp-post in nothing but his boxers, wearing L plates and pink fluffy handcuffs. Guy decided to phone Zosia, but only after laughing hysterically for 10 minutes and taking a photo as evidence.

"Zosia can you come and collect your fiancé…he's in a spot of bother…" Guy laughed down the phone as Zosia heard the other laugh and Arthur slur what sounded like "this isn't fair, let me go".

"What is it dad?" she asked, Colette's ears pricking up.

"Let's just say…he won't make it back unless you come and get him" Guy smirked.

"Dad, you're being cryptic. What is it?" Zosia sighed. She could tell everyone was drunk.

"You need to bring the keys for the handcuffs-" Guy laughed and Zosia looked over at Colette confused.

"Um dad, I don't have any handcuffs…for gods sake!" she sighed. _I don't like where this conversation is going…_ Colette looked up from her phone when Zosia said this and started to laugh, and Zosia rolled her eyes.

"You didn't let me finish, they're in Dominic's room-"

"It wouldn't surprise me if Dom has handcuffs-" she sighed again, and then Guy interrupted her.

"Dominic assures me he bought them specifically for our little prank. What you young ones all get up to is none of my business and I really don't want to know…"

"I've already told you, they're not mine! In fact, why are we even talking about this? Have you attached poor Arthur to a lamppost somewhere?!" Zosia continued, trying not to laugh but Colette couldn't contain herself. Guy looked over at Arthur who had now slumped to the ground in surrender while Jesse fed him tequila through a funnel.

"I'm sorry…we've broken him" Dom laughed as he snatched the phone from Guy. "We're outside Revolutions…I think we're all calling it a night…Arthur's really enjoyed himself…" he laughed. The amount Arthur had drunk ensured that he had a beast of a hangover the next morning, made worse by the fact that his daughter just wanted his attention and to play, and the photos had already circulated Facebook…


	40. Chapter 40

**A/N Thank you to everyone who has read so far** **and special thanks to NiamhMcGrady-fanpage for another lovely review!**

'Matilda you need to stay sitting down!' Zosia said sternly as her daughter got fussy and fidgety while the plane was taking off, and Matilda frowned.

'No!' She sulked as Arthur took her arms and held them away from her buckle as he could tell she was going to try and climb up out of the seat.

'Your daughter...' Zosia sighed, and Arthur looked at her in disbelief.

'What do you mean?'

'I bet you were a fidgeter' Zosia sniggered as Arthur smiled and shook his head.

'No way, I was an obedient child' he smiled, feeling smug. 'I bet you were a fidgeter'

'Pfft nope' she laughed and Arthur turned around to Guy who was sitting behind him.

'Mr Self, was Zosia as fidgety as Matilda?' He asked and Zosia went bright red with embarrassment as she took over trying to stop Matilda from climbing out of her seat.

'Zoshie hated flying when she was little, it always made her ears pop...and after take off and landing she was quite fidgety, yes. She wanted to be up one minute, sitting the next, wanting to sit on my knee, then Anya's, then up again...we arrived on holiday or in Poland absolutely exhausted' Guy laughed.

'Thanks dad, and here I was hoping that Matilda would have inherited Arthur's behavioural genes'.

After a 3 hour flight, they landed in Lublin. They all rented a couple of cars and drove out to Podlaska, where Zosia's mother had grown up and her grandparents still lived. Guy felt nostalgic, having visited the area a lot in previous years, and Arthur, Jesse, Dom and Colette were enjoying their first visit. They had arranged to meet Zosia's grandparents for dinner that evening and although Arthur was nervous to meet them, his mind was more heavily occupied by anxiety about the wedding. He loved Zosia, of course he did. But he was afraid of being in the spotlight, nervous that he wouldn't be enough as a husband, that he would just let Zosia down. Of course, these thoughts were exaggerated, Zosia was excited to be marrying her soulmate. But Arthur wondered whether it would be better if they just stayed engaged for a little while longer, and called off the wedding?

During dinner with the grandparents, Arthur sloped off outside for some fresh air, and Dom noticed that he had been gone for a while. He went outside and watched Arthur for a few moments. Arthur didn't notice him, but the sat nervously, fidgeting with his hands a lot. Dom wasn't getting a good vibe from Arthur's body language at all, so decided to investigate. After a few moments, Dom went outside.

'Are you alright Diggers?' He asked, sitting down on the edge of the wall next to his flatmate. Arthur snapped out of his daydream and for a second, considered talking to Dom about his dilemma. But he thought better of it, he knew he was being selfish but he couldn't seem to shake these feelings, not now they were in Poland and hours away from getting married...

'I'm fine, thanks. Just wanted to get some fresh air.' He lied.

'You sure? You've barely said a word since we got here...' he replied, eyebrow raised and crossing his arms. 'Not having second thoughts are you?'

'What? What makes you think that?'

'You're even more of a nervous nelly than usual' Dom replied, matter of fact and deadpan.

'I'm fine' Arthur snapped, standing abruptly and going back inside. He caught Zosia's glance and she smiled at him.

'Where did you get to?' She smiled as he sat down and put Matilda on his knee. Zosia's grandparents smiled at him, but as they couldn't speak much English, Zosia and Guy had to translate. 'Babcia and dziadek were just saying that they have sorted their outfits for the wedding, they haven't been to one for nearly 20 years!' Zosia smiled, and the elderly couple next to her smiled back as her grandmother held Zosia's hand and stroked her hair affectionately.

'I'm so proud and excited Zosia' she smiled in Polish, and Arthur smiled weakly.

'You know, Arthur, the church is the same one that our family have married in for generations' her grandfather said, and Zosia translated, and again Arthur smiled weakly.

'That's fascinating' was all he could think of to say in response, and Zosia looked at him suspiciously. _He's more nervous than usual...I wonder what's on his mind?_

As they arrived back at the hotel, Arthur was still very quiet compared to usual and Zosia wasn't getting a good vibe from him at all, so while their guests had drinks in the hotel bar, Arthur slipped away to the bedroom and Zosia followed him.

'What's wrong with you today?' Zosia asked, causing Arthur to jump and turn around abruptly. She looked upset, worried, he thought. 'You've been really distant all day, and it hasn't gone unnoticed with the others either. Are you having second thoughts?' She asked, welling up slightly. _No Zosia, you will not cry._

'No, everything's fine' Arthur smiled, but Zosia shook her head.

'It isn't' she said sadly. 'I know you, remember? You're hiding something...' She continued cautiously as she stepped towards the bed where Arthur was now sitting. He turned towards her, and she looked worried. He wanted to be honest, but he knew it would break her heart if he revealed that he wanted to give themselves more time for the wedding...he knew how it would sound.

'Honestly, everything is fine. Yes I'm a bit nervous, but tomorrow will be great' he smiled, but deep down he was crumpling, wishing he could have the guts to go through with everything...she looked a little more relaxed, and she put her arms around him and he kissed her. 'I love you Zosia...never forget that.'

Arthur was worried. He hoped that with sleep things would feel clearer and he would start to feel excited about the wedding...he desperately wanted to…


	41. Chapter 41

Arthur didn't sleep all night with worrying about the wedding and that he wouldn't be a good enough husband for Zosia. He had spent the night sitting in the armchair in the room, just thinking, too anxious to sleep. He loved Zosia too much to let her down, but in his state of anxiety it became a choice of letting her down on her wedding day, or letting her down (despite how unlikely that was) in later life. Zosia was sleeping in Colette's room so that they wouldn't see each other until the wedding, and Arthur knew he had a decision to make. They were due to walk down the aisle in 2 hours, and he knew that Dom and Jesse would be along shortly...

'Diggers, wakey wakey! Rise and shine!' Dom called through the door, and then he opened it but was confused to see the room empty, the bed hadn't been slept in...and Arthur was nowhere to be seen...

'Where is he?!' Jesse asked, alarmed, and Dom frowned.

'Oh no...please, no' he muttered, and Jesse looked at him, confused. 'He was acting really weird yesterday...I think he's done a runner...we have to find him'

'What about his folks? They're here aren't they?'

'Morning...where's Arthur?' They turned around and Peter was behind them, looking as confused as them.

'He's not here...we don't know where he is...' Jesse frowned.

The three men searched everywhere in the hotel and couldn't find Arthur, and couldn't reach him over the phone either. With time rapidly running out, they had no option but to tell Zosia, Colette and Guy...

'Guys...we have a problem...' Dom frowned as he sighed, entering the room where Zosia, now in her wedding dress, was having her makeup done by Colette. They were half an hour away from walking down the aisle, and the news that Dom had to break was the last thing she wanted to hear...

'What is it?' Zosia turned

Dom took a deep breath, approached Zosia and took her hands. 'Arthur is missing'

The room was silent, and they all stood. Guy looked furious, Matilda looked around at everyone wondering what was going on, Colette looked at Zosia and Zosia looked like she was about to cry...

'What?!' She gasped. 'What do you mean, missing?!'

'I'm sorry, we haven't been able to find him all morning, his bed hasn't been slept in, he isn't answering his phone...even his dad doesn't know' Dom replied sympathetically. Zosia looked stressed, and started to cry

'I knew something was wrong!' She cried, pacing around the room while Guy and Colette tried to calm her down, and Jesse and Dom tried phoning Arthur again and again, desperately hoping to get through to him. 'How the fuck could he do this?!' She shouted, sitting down and putting her head in her hands. Matilda was being occupied by Zosia's grandparents by now, and Guy and Colette comforted her. Meanwhile, Dom finally got hold of Arthur...

'Diggers, where the hell are you?!'

'I can't do this' Arthur panicked, and Dom rolled his eyes.

'We'd guessed that...I'm coming to find you, where are you?'

Dom and Jesse found Arthur sitting in the park opposite the church, where he sat in his suit, loosened tie, cold and pale. They didn't know what was running through his mind, but Dom felt conflicted by his wanting to protect Zosia, and be supportive to Arthur. He sat down next to Arthur while Jesse went back to inform the others they'd found the groom...

'Are you seriously considering bailing on her, Diggers?' Dom asked.

'I don't want to bail, but I don't want to let her down- it's inevitable that I will'

'And jilting her at the alter isn't letting her down...' Dom snapped slightly, sarcastically, and Arthur frowned, putting his head in his hands. Dom took a deep sigh and sat next to Arthur. 'You seem to be forgetting how good you are together. I know you're worried, everyone is before getting married. But every second you're spending out here, is making your wedding day worse, and women don't forget that...apparently' Dom commented, realising that now wasn't the time for joking around, in his mind he had a wedding to save! However, they were interrupted by someone clearing their throat behind them, and they turned around to see a very confused, and upset, Zosia...

'Dom, can you give us a moment?' She said quietly, not taking her eyes off of Arthur. Dom nodded and stood, and squeezed her hand before he left. Zosia sat down next to Arthur, who had turned away slightly. He couldn't face making eye contact with the woman he had already let down so badly, which was ironic given that that was what he wanted to avoid in the first place.

'What's going on Arthur?' She said quietly, trying not to cry. 'Don't you want to get married?'

'I want to marry you...it's just-'

'Just what? Is it me? Don't you love me anymore?' She welled up, and Arthur quickly tried to reassure her.

'Of course I love you, I mean it more and more every time I tell you. But...I'm scared I can't be the husband you deserve. What if I let you down?'

'Arthur, I'm in love with you. You could never let me down. Besides, we've been through too much together for me to turn around now and tell you that you snore and its irritating' Zosia smirked and Arthur looked at her, confused. 'Arthur we're bound to have ups and downs, all couples do, but we're good together- is that all you're worried about?'

Arthur looked down, and stayed quiet. He felt like he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. 'You need to decide what you want Digby' she sighed sadly, welling up, and she stood and started to walk away.

Then, everything clicked. Arthur looked up to see Zosia walking away, and he realised that he never wanted to put her through that again, but also that...he couldn't be without her. He needed to be brave to give both of them the future they deserved. He stood abruptly. 'Zosh! Wait!'

Zosia turned around and Arthur threw his arms around her and kissed her. 'I'm so sorry' he cried. 'I didn't want to let you down, but I can't break your heart either...I think I want to marry you today'

'You think? Or you know?' Zosia asked, nervously, a tear flowing down her cheek. Arthur wiped away the tear with his thumb and took his hand.

'Let's go' he smiled.

 _ **Half an hour later**_

'Zosia, I know that the past few days have been a roller coaster for us' Arthur began his vows, and she smiled, laughing. 'But all this time, ever since we got together, all I've wanted is to be sure I can be the husband you deserve. I promise to love you unconditionally, and until I met you I never knew what it felt like to have a soul mate, a life companion, and to share my life with my best friend. You are an amazing woman, amazing mother, and you have truly saved my life in a way I'll never be able to explain. I love you and can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you.' he smiled with tears in my eyes.

'Arthur, the past few years have been tough, but you've never left my side, and time and time again you prove why I love you and why you're my soulmate. You're a perfect father to our little girl, and every day I am more proud of, and more in love with you. I will look after you the way you've looked after me, I promise to love you more every day. It's you and me against the world.' Zosia smiled, tears in her eyes and Arthur smiled at her. In the congregation the guests of the couple were smiling, Guy had a tear in his eye, and then came the moment they had all been waiting for...

'I now pronounce you husband and wife- you may kiss the bride'

Zosia and Arthur leaned in together and as they kissed with an eclectic and exciting mixture of fireworks and butterflies, Zosia and Arthur smiled. As the wedding drew to a close, the group returned to the hotel for a small reception and it was smiles-all-round as they realised that they were married...Mr and Mrs Digby.

Matilda was enjoying being a bridesmaid as it made her look like a princess, and as she danced with Jesse and Colette, Guy congratulated the couple and gave them both a hug.

'Congratulations darling' he smiled at Zosia, holding her arms and kissed her on the cheek. The. He turned to Arthur, and shook his hand. 'I don't know what happened earlier, but well done Digby. Welcome officially to the family' he smiled before giving Arthur a man hug. Zosia's grandparents were over the moon to have witnessed their granddaughter getting married, and they enjoyed a dance and reminisced about their own wedding, and Guy's and Anya's wedding.

Matilda eventually ran over and Zosia picked her up, and as the young family danced and enjoyed the evening, Zosia thought to herself that she had a lot to be grateful and happy for. She was celebrating the best day of her life with her family, close friends, daughter and husband, and she smiled.

 _So this is what it's like to marry your soulmate...I wouldn't change this feeling for the world.'_

 **A/N so we've reached the end! It's been a pleasure to write this fanfiction and I wish this didn't have to end, but if I'm honest, in my head I'd only thought about writing up to the wedding and finishing it there, but I'm open to the idea of a sequel in future!**

 **I want to sincerely thank everyone who has read this story, the stats have been overwhelming and have given me so much confidence as a first-time fanfic writer (so much so that I'm writing another one!), so thank you! I never expected to both finish this story and put it all out here, so thank you. And huge thanks also to those who have reviewed and given feedback, particularly NiamhMcGrady-fanpage (who has been of real help with some brilliant ideas along the way, so thank you!), perpetualpathology and good cyberman who have reviewed on more than one occasion :-)**

 **I am still writing 'Be Brave, Cara' which I should be able to update more frequently, and in the very early planning stages of a Zosia/Ollie fanfic, so watch this space!**

 **Thanks again everyone- happy reading!**

 **CArfwedsonFan91 x**


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